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15 May 2008

I got me da blooze. [More:] Today was a pretty ordinary day until a young lady sidled up to the selling counter with a laundy cart full of cloth bags and one bag that looked like a little suitcase. I emptied the books out of the cloth ones and as I reached for the little case, she said "No books in there, just a bunch of harmonicas." "What?" "Harmonicas, like ten of them. I found it on the street." She opened it, and sure enough, there they lay like Little Walter's honeymoon luggage. "Want one? I found the case on the street." (There's somebody out there all bloozed up with no place to go, I guess). "Sure," I said and picked out a Hohner Marine Band model with a sticker on it saying 'Low D.' I live within phlegm-hawking distance of two railroad tracks, so my life is crying out for a mouth organ, you know. It's currently soaking in a cup full of soapy water in the kitchen.

When I got home, I saw my landlady's son on the stoop smoking a cigar and told him the tale of the magic Hohner from Heaven and he seemed amused. Sadly, a few minutes later as I tried to open my apartment door I discoved my lock was broken and summoned him and a friend who he was talking to. They took a ladder out of the garage and I climbed the three floors (just call me a second story man) to get in our porch door (and tied it to a lawn chair so it wouldn't get stolen-a major worry of the aforementioned landlord's son). After about an hour of unscrewing, gouging and loud Grecian cursing, the lock mechanism was removed and they're out getting a new one.

I got me them broken door in Astoria, climbin' ladders on Ditmars Boulevard bah-looze...

(my blues name is Caffienated Slim, I've decided.
I have nothing witty to say here, just that this post made me LOL several times.
posted by BoringPostcards 15 May | 19:45
If everything I've heard about New York streets is true, there's no way in hell I'd let that thing within 20 feet of my mouth, soapy water or no.
posted by bmarkey 15 May | 19:52
Well, she found the case on the street, not the harmonicas themselves and I'm not sticking the case in my mouth.
posted by jonmc 15 May | 19:54
Still. At the risk of sounding like my mother, you don't know where that harp's been. TB is no fun, and mere soap won't kill it.
posted by bmarkey 15 May | 20:00
I'll buy some rubbing alcohol.
posted by jonmc 15 May | 20:15
Go get you a new one. You can get a nice clean uninfected Marine Band harp fairly cheap - a little poking around online says they're going for about $30, and I'll bet you can find one cheaper in a music store. (If memory serves, they usually suggest C harps for beginners - I'm pretty sure that's what mine was. Damn, now I wanna go out and get one myself.)
posted by bmarkey 15 May | 20:22
Eh, soak it in something killing and let it dry repeatedly. Unless it's rusty and weird, it should be okay.
i've used a rusty weird one, unknowingly. You don't wanna do that.
Now i wonder what happened to the one my dad gave me 20 years ago.
posted by ethylene 15 May | 20:41
It's the city man's version of Local Hero. Groovy, baby.
posted by chewatadistance 15 May | 20:41
Pips has convinced me not to play it (unless I can get it autoclaved somehow), but I'm keeping it.
posted by jonmc 15 May | 21:06
Great story. What a sad tale, who would dump their organs [mouth] in a dumpster... or onto the street¿ now Them's 'da blues, indeed.

But jeebus man, not soapy fucking water. What are ya doin'¿ You washing your hands or sumthing¿ You're rusting the shit out of that puppy. Quick, dip in 99% rubbing alcohol, [or some overproof vodka-seriously], ask the pharmacist, it's behind the counter here in Communist Canada./ [No, not the vodka...]

Ask Carlos Del Junco, Toronto's eminent harpist. He carries a suitcase full to each gig. Fucking wicked./

Start here, enjoy.
posted by alicesshoe 15 May | 21:06
I guess I'm a glass-half-empty guy. I keep picturing some sad old hobo wondering where he left his life's collection of harmonicas when he blacked out last night. Ghaaaaah.
posted by shane 15 May | 21:11
The case had a little plate on it with the 'Fender,' logo, leading me to believe that they belonged to a semi-professional musician at least. I'm hoping i can get this bad boy sterilized since it would be cool to blow a harp with some history to it.
posted by jonmc 15 May | 21:14
Soap actually works as well as most disinfectants and there aren't many things that can survive a long time outside a lively medium.
i wouldn't be so worried about getting herpes or hep or anything from it as much as the weird taste and fear of tetanus from a rusty one. If it looks fine, clean it well with a hardy disinfectant and you should be fine, but look up care guides on the internet just in case. You don't want to damage it.
posted by ethylene 15 May | 21:25
Pips has convinced me not to play it (unless I can get it autoclaved somehow), but I'm keeping it.
Don't be a fucking wuss - stick that sucker in your mouth and blow your wizened lungs out. With your lifestyle, you are never going to die of any kind of infection.
posted by dg 15 May | 21:36
Play it. I'm sure dirtier things have been in your mouth.
posted by spork 15 May | 21:41
Get a real Blues Name here (courtesy of MeFi's Own Cortex)
posted by wendell 15 May | 21:44
DO IT.
≡ Click to see image ≡
posted by ethylene 15 May | 21:44
Play it. I'm sure dirtier things have been in your mouth.

I'll never forget that weekend we shared in Sheboygan either, but this is a different issue...
posted by jonmc 15 May | 21:47
Shit shane, now That's blue[s]. Well said.

I was thinking the same thing, dg, but really and truly¿ NAH./

From what I know, soap and water just doesn't cut it, unless you scrub for 18 seconds. Or till you sing happy birthday while scrubbing...

That's why they say that glycol gels are more sanitary than soap and water. Ask the doctors and nurses at the hospital how they sanitize their hands.
Glycol.
So, that's why the rubbing alcohol soak.
One for the harp, 2 for you.
One for the harp, for good measure, 2 for you...

Now you're all gettin' set to play./

posted by alicesshoe 15 May | 21:48
Wow, crazy. Who would leave their whole kit out for someone to pick up?

I'm in favor of picking up a new one, too. Not for fear of sickness, but so you're assured of in-tuneness. Nothin' worse than an out of tune harmonica.
posted by me3dia 15 May | 22:44
Need an autoclave? Sounds like a job for gaspode to me. ^_^
posted by TrishaLynn 15 May | 22:50
Play it damn it. A gift from the godz.
posted by arse_hat 15 May | 23:25
My friends got a poem where she says she can't afford to soak a harmonica in bourbon, so she uses the corner shop's cheap lager.

Instead of it sounding like the Mississippi swamplands, it ends up sounding like small-town boozy England. The sound of football fans, cheap neon, the karaoke pub on the corner, chino's and white shirts.

So yes... Best bourbon only for that harp my friend.
posted by seanyboy 16 May | 01:44
Oh, gosh. I see things like that by the dumpsters around here sometimes (we got an amazing vintage sewing machine this way), and I always think it was an old person who died. :( The family or landlord doesn't want to deal with their old shit. I'm always amazed.

I'd say dump in alcohol then blow dry, or set in the hot sun... but that's probably surely stupid advice. I don't know what I'm talking about.
posted by taz 16 May | 02:14
Aside from the human health concerns being pointed to in this thread, there are also harmonica health concerns to consider. Here's what the good folks at Hohner have to say:

Never soak, rinse, or boil a harmonica. A number of harmonica instruction books and other sources recommend this practice. However, soaking or boiling a harmonica will make painted surfaces peel, cause the wooden combs to warp or crack, promote corrosion of metal reeds and the reed plate, destroy the wind saving valves and void the warranty. In short, soaking or boiling your harmonica will damage it beyond repair.

But then, I don't reckon Caffienated Slim is all that worried about any warranty....
posted by flapjax at midnite 16 May | 04:42
Since Guiliani's time as mayor, it's safe to put ANYTHING in your mouth that you find on the street. Or so I have been told. .

So no worries.
posted by danf 16 May | 07:33
Now I see why the email happened... sure if you're serious I can autoclave it for you, jon.

Doctors and nurses use alcohol because it's quicker, not better, AFAIK.

posted by gaspode 16 May | 07:52
A good story well told becomes a great one. Thanks for the larfs, jon!

It reminds me of some friends I had years ago, who talked about starting a blues band. One of them was a pale, lean specimen with the last name of Wyatt. When they were coming up with their blues names, he decided his would be Fishbelly.
posted by elizard 16 May | 10:17
This shall surely be the first autoclaved harp in the history of Blues.
(Can we call it an autoharp then? No, not really.)
posted by me3dia 16 May | 10:43
(Can we call it an autoharp then?

Too bad it isn't a percussion instrument -- then it'd be claves!
posted by tangerine 16 May | 13:13
According to my research, some hydrogen peroxide is all it takes.
posted by jonmc 16 May | 18:41
I Live in the Nostalgia Capital of the United States || I need help pairing a dish

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