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14 April 2008

Please send good energy my way: [More:]
I don't know what's going on with me lately. I am absolutely exhausted and almost weepy this morning, and I am getting enough sleep. I know it's toward the end of the semester, and I have more on my plate than usual (a search committee; some new research project; plus the usual end-of-semester crunch). I'm wondering if my antidepressant is failing me, or if my mother's death (which I haven't cried over yet) is finally getting to me or what.

So please send good energy my way so I can see clear through this.
I'm sending big, warm hugs and whuffles. Hang in there.
posted by Specklet 14 April | 11:18
Be gentle with yourself. That's an enormous amount to deal with, even if you don't consciously recognize that. *hugs*
posted by occhiblu 14 April | 11:25
Thinking of you...
posted by shane 14 April | 11:30
*hug* Hang in there, lleachie!
posted by BoringPostcards 14 April | 11:32
*soft, enveloping hugs, sent your way*
posted by danf 14 April | 11:33
*whuffles*
posted by sperose 14 April | 11:40
(((lleachie)))
posted by small_ruminant 14 April | 12:00
*hugs* and *whuffles*
posted by lysdexic 14 April | 12:26
nice big warm hug for lleachie
posted by special-k 14 April | 12:41
Awww, lleachie, I just read the post you made this morning about what you had to do today, or had already done, and was thinking you're working a bit hard. (Had no idea about your mother passing away, sorry!)

Yes, have a good cry, let it all out--you'll feel much better. And don't worry about the work; we know you'll get through it.
posted by hadjiboy 14 April | 12:52
*hugs* lots of 'em. Heading your way.
posted by gaspode 14 April | 12:55
Thanks all for the hugs -- they really do help! I can feel the whuffiness!

Mom passed away in December, so it's not THAT recent, but I really haven't cried about it yet. Nor did I take any time off, as it happened during Christmas.

I think at least two of the other stressors that might have contributed are:

1) I came out as a childhood sexual abuse survivor for our student paper, because they were writing an article about the value of college support systems for that sort of thing. I mean, it's 30 years and a lot of therapy later, but it's still a bit stressful.

2) One of my former students last week confided in me that he was housing a friend of his who, it turned out, was wanted for murder. I didn't believe the guy at first (he tells some tall tales, let's say) until I read about his friend in the newspaper the next day. So I wondered if I was going to get a call from the cops and whether it was ethical to report this confidence, until I found out the friend turned himself in and was held on bond.

I can't wait till this semester is over! I get a week's break before summer classes -- and that's not nearly as strenuous.
posted by lleachie 14 April | 13:37
It sounds as if you've had a lot on your plate lately. Don't be too hard on yourself, and take some time to do some things that make you feel good.
posted by essexjan 14 April | 13:59
Not to dismiss the emotional basis for your feelings, but how's your potassium level? When mine gets low I get weepy. I don't think it's a huge problem for most people but it hits me pretty hard. I take diuretics (which is cause of my low potassium), and now I take a potassium supplement too. It helps quite a bit and very quickly too (within a day). Go eat a banana or 2 and see if you feel better.

posted by doctor_negative 14 April | 14:15
Sending lots of good thoughts your way. Be patient with yourself and any way you are dealing with your mom's death is appropriate. But make sure you are gentle with yourself with all the stresses you have. If you have the ability to take long hot bubble baths, do so, it really helps (I don't, but did when I could).

Hugs.
posted by Sil 14 April | 14:16
More hugs to you.
posted by Stewriffic 14 April | 15:48
When I read this, I wondered if I had written and posted it. My Mom died in December, and I was sad, and the funeral made it real, etc. But it didn't hit me hard. I've been logy and physically depressed the last couple months, but couldn't pin it down. Then I had some realizations about my Mom, cried a bit, thought long and hard, and have felt better. Grief can't be hurried; it came out the way it had to and my brain's been busy processing. Sending you good thoughts.
posted by theora55 14 April | 17:20
Long, strong hugs coming your way. I wish I could sit beside you and listen, and make funny jokes and make you laugh.
posted by redvixen 14 April | 18:29
gosh lleachie that is a lot to bear at one time. Do look after yourself, and go with the grief when it arises. I'm sorry for you and for theora55 for losing your moms. One day / hour / week / whatever works at a time. :)
posted by chewatadistance 14 April | 19:21
Reading the thread late.

That's a lot to handle, lleachie. I hope you're feeling better. Not too long ago I discussed some damaging things in therapy and I swear I was wiped out for weeks, and that was just one thing. Hugs, lleachie.
posted by LoriFLA 14 April | 19:52
*Hugs again, lleachie*
posted by hadjiboy 14 April | 22:07
Thanks for the good energy. I have some more energy today; I think some of that stuff was stressing me more than I thought.

I did blow off a faculty meeting yesterday; I was so tired by 3 PM I was sick; they proceeded just fine without me.

Thanks again!
posted by lleachie 15 April | 13:07
Skeets McDonald 'The Tattooed Lady.' || What are you looking forward to this week?

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