I hope this doesn't sound too morbid, but when I looked at this collection, I thought of my mother when she died and wish I had gotten a picture of her -- both immediately after she died and when the funeral home had done its magic with makeup.

I had not seen my mother since my wedding in March 2007, and when I saw her the day before she died in December, I was shocked at how much she had withered in such a short time. Cancer can do that to a person. Yet, my mother was still a beautiful person, one who became prettier with age, despite her thinning hair and widow's hump. When she died, her cheeks looked sunken because the doctors had removed her dentures, and her skin was yellowed.

The body in the casket looked a lot more than the mother I remembered, with the ivory-rose complexion and strong features I knew so well. She looked serene, which as I have said before was a state I had never associated with my mother. She was still beautiful.

Wow, that's a pretty heavy read. Thanks, I've not been over to dooce much lately.

I had the opportunity to see my little sister's body before the funeral home had done all of it's makeup, but I just couldn't do it. Seeing her body at the funeral, I understood how people could believe with all of their heart that their loved one really wasn't dead. The makeup was so heavy - she never wore makeup in real life - that she didn't look like herself.

I really wish I could be one of those people that say they're ready to die. But I have to admit, I'm not ready. Better get to work on my dreams.
Seeing this from my rotting-in-an-office-all-day job really makes me wonder what the damn point is.

Wow. That is a very beautiful and powerful series of portraits.

and yeah, what Specklet said.

"And I’d only just bought myself a new fridge-freezer! If I’d only known!"

I hope I'll be in the mood to say such things when I'm dying. They are very lovely pictures.

I looked through that entire set yesterday, and never realized that the second portrait of each person was post-mortem. Guess my reading comprehension skills need work.

I didn't see my dad between his death and before the funeral home had done its magic. Everyone who did has told me that I shouldn't be sorry.

[and I was writing up why they said so, and I couldn't fucking finish it. Damn I miss my dad.]

what Specklet said for sure

I made it to the woman with breast cancer who preferred to die alone and couldn't hold back tears anymore.

The funeral home we took my grandfather to did a great job. It wasn't until after that I realized he had been made up at all.

I, the only one out of the family, could not bear to go to the viewing of my father. Just could not do it, both for my own feelings and not wanting to be around my mom and sibs (I was 17) for it.

'Pode, this is a great post.

Wow. This is really affecting. It's striking (maybe surprisingly) how sad a lot of them are. You usually hear about people putting on a brave face, talking about ascending to heaven, whatever. This was really honest and really gut-wrenching.

(We saw the Annie Leibovitz exhibit in SF last week. I'm reminded of the photos of Susan Sontag's death.)

This really got to me:

Beate had been receiving treatment for breast cancer for four years, but by the time we met she had had her final course of chemotherapy, and knew she was going to die. She had even been to see the grave where she was to be buried.

mudpuppie- that's the exact spot where I started crying at my desk. :(

Yeah, this really resonated with me. Particularly, as pups points out, the honesty in the people's statements. I really hope I die suddenly. It's selfish, I guess, because it's only really better for me (rather than my loved ones), but hey, if you can't be selfish about your own death...?

This was featured on MetaFilter yesterday.
I say this just in case any of you'd like to read or contribute to the thread there.

Death just sucks. . it's one of those constants. Part of our condition but that does not make it OK.

Beautiful and sad and moving. Good link.

Beautiful link. Such an elegance in the post mortem photography. I only hope when my time comes I can face it bravely. When my ex-mother-in-law passed, no one had a recent photo of her (they could've asked me, as I've always been the family photographer, but didn't) because she'd been sick for a while and didn't want her picture taken. Therefore, the woman in the casket didn't look anything like the woman I'd known. The funeral home had done teh best they could, but the picture they'd been given to work with was probably from the '70s, and she died in 2002.

not to be morbid, and please forgive me if this offends anyone, but if Mr. V does not survive his cancer, I would like a post mortem photo (done beautifully). To me, he is the most beautiful man I've ever met, and I want to remember every aspect of his being.

Beautiful.