Yes, post a note.

It never ceases to amaze me the way our toilets are left at work. I wrack my brain sometimes trying to guess who amongst my co-workers could leave them in such a state.

A couple of years ago we even had a shit-thrower, who daubed the stalls. It was bad enough that Facilities sent an email round the building saying, look, we know this isn't accidental and if we find out who it is ...

It stopped.

It wasn't me.

Go ahead and put up a sign. Just don't expect it to do any good. Alas. The only thing that might work is a concealed camera and subsequent remotely activated cattle prod. People don't read signs. They really, really don't. Sometimes I spend hours creating signs that say helpful things like, Admission: $4 and then I place these large, clear signs above the admission desk and then I weep in despair and turn to drinking heavily when, one after another, the general public walks in and stands in line right by my clearly visible sign only to say "How much is admission?"

Other people piss on the toilet seat, and you're worried about whether you're being appropriate??

Heh.

Yeah, put up a note. I've seen 'em around here and there. I too cannot imagine the type of person who just leaves a stall without cleaning up.

Someone in our office building put up a similar notice in our restroom, though, weirdly, in only one of the stalls (and the note said they had had complaints about that particular stall).

(I found out about the note when my boss, who was using that stall at the time, asked me (I was at the sink) if I had noticed it; I said no and she laughed and said that I must not be the culprit, since I hadn't used that stall since the notice went up. It was a weird moment. Advanced etiquette tip: Don't talk to your subordinates about their peeing behaviors from the bathroom stall.)

Anyway, where was I? Oh, right. The building management has an office on our floor, and I think they were the ones to put a notice up, and they did it on building-office-management letterhead so it looked all official and less passive-aggressive. Any chance of that happening at your place?

I don't think very many women actually pee on the seat (I could be wrong, of course); I think what's more common is that the power of the WHOOSH of the toilet splashes the top of the seat. You might have a more successful campaign if you post as though all splashage is caused the latter, and encourage everyone to look out for one another by cleaning up after the toilets.

Beware the power of the WHOOSH.

DO NOT SPRINKLE WHEN YOU TINKLE.

occhiblu, I think they would, but there's currently a whole fiasco about the state of the men's bathroom due, specifically, to the volume of usage on weeks when we run a bunch of classes [about 70% of the time.] Consequently, I'm hesitant to ask them to be responsible for policing the activities in the ladies' bathroom as well. We're a bit of a problem child, you see, and I was hoping to avoid cementing that image in their psyches for as long as possible.

TPS, I need to re-iterate that it only happens when we have a large number of women in classes as well as the fact that I'm not talking about a fine mist of urine on the seats, I'm talking large, yellow drops all over the seats, not to mention on the floor itself [seriously, wtf, do they drip dry or what?] Again, occurring only when we have a bunch of women in class.

I find it hard to believe that the true issue is that the female tenants posses unique and superior flushing skills. ;)

And, 'pups, sprinkle to your heart's content, but for f*ck's sake, wipe that mess up!!

DO NOT SPRINKLE WHEN YOU TINKLE.

If you sprinkle when you tinkle,
Be a sweetie, wipe the seatie!

Seriously, though, these indiscriminate pissers must be walking out with some substantial amount of urine still on them. They must experience mad chaffing.

I'd say go with aggressive. Notes only work here if you start them out with something like "For Christ's sake clean the f***ing toilet seat when you piss on it!" Passive aggressive notes are disregarded.

I wonder if you could do a warning note instead: Warning! Possible Piss on Toilet Seat! (Women here raised in barns.) though we kept our barn very tidy and relatively piss free, thankyouverymuch

I don't think you're going to make any headway posting angry notes. Everyone will just assume you're talking about someone else.

Perhaps a mop, paper towels, and other cleaning supplies could be placed near the toilet? Nothing makes me crazier than wanting to clean up a mess and not being able to find anything to do it with (my mother keeps her toilet plunger in the GARAGE- what good does it do there when the toilet is overflowing????)

I agree with TPS that more often than not, the water on the seat is caused by a too-powerful flushing mechanism.

Oh, missed your follow-up about the yellow drops. Yuck.

We have the same problem at our office. I think it's from germ-o-phobic people not wanting to have their butts touch the seat, so they squat, leading to the drops. But then it should be their obligation to lift the seat before squatting or to wipe off after sprinkling. But (my guess) they're still germ-o-phobic so they won't touch the seat to lift or wipe.

We've put up signs and emailed all of the ladies to no avail.

Perhaps the problem should be addressed on the front end. Female class participants should be required to sign a contract that details which actions will result in the loss of pee-pee privileges.

Piss on the seats and floors? This only comes from women who hover.

Make a hover haiku!

If you hover when
you wee you must wipe seat or
we will see your wee

Piss on the seats and floors? This only comes from women who hover.

Make a hover haiku!

If you hover when
you wee you must wipe seat or
we will see your wee

why the heck does that doublepost thing keep happening to me, dammit!?

Could your instructors say something to the class at the beginning of the day? Something along the lines of "We've been getting complaints in the building because our students have been leaving both the men's and women's bathrooms a mess. If you'd like to be able to use the bathrooms this week, please clean up after yourselves"?

It might be more effective than a note. On the other hand, it might induce more rebellion than a note. My only experience with similar things involved college students who were somehow too self-absorbed to understand, "The dining hall workers are annoyed with us for leaving dirty plates, so please pick them up when you leave," and only responded to "If you leave any plates tonight, I will not allow anyone to bring any food to rehearsals at all, ever," delivered in my sternest, calmest don't-fuck-with-me voice.

okay, I have discovered that this phenomenon is directly related to the neurotic germophobes amongst us who refuse to actually SIT THE FUCK DOWN on toilet seats. Which, by the way, have been scientifically proven to be more hygenic than your average keyboard, desk surface or kitchen counter and don't even TALK to me about those nasty dishtowels / kitchen sponges .

Maybe something along the lines of IT IS ONLY OK TO SQUAT AND HOVER IF YOU LIFT THE FRACKING SEAT FIRST KTHXBYE!!!!

I swear to god I've been SO VERY tempted to use the men's room in places where this occurs grumblegrumbleripsnort

And this is why I'm glad to be the only woman in my workplace. Where they have separate men's and women's bathrooms.

(Fuck those people who hover and then piss all over the seat. Ew. I like to be comfortable when I'm taking a leak, not concentrating on my fucking aim.)

I don't know how you guys gals walk around with those things.

Know what? I was just thinking about this Saturday night, out at my favorite local pub. I had to wait on line for the bat'room, and the gal passed right by me as she left and smiled in a friendly way. Then I go in and find that this sweet, otherwise human-looking individual has left dribble all over the seat. And it was my final personal straw on this.

So here was the solution I came up as I sat there fuming. I would like to issue a Design Challenge. This will be a contest for designers who have access to some server space. The goal: design a printable sheet of labels that can be printed as stickers. The design should be a way to graphically or textually represent the idea that YOU SHOULD NOT PEE ON THE TOILET SEAT. No hover! Or if you hover, wipe! Or if you use a layer of carefully mosaic'd TP, you should flush it! But no matter what, you should LEAVE THE SEAT CLEAN for the next gal.

Ideally, this would take the form of a small design repeated six or eight times over the page, so that we could download and print a copy (or even print it off the web), cut the stickers into small sizes that can easily fit into a goin'-out purse or jeans pocket, and then slap on a bat'room wall as necessary. It'll help start a campaign, and I feel like it's a meme that would spread rather quickly and easily.

So who wants to be known as the designer who empowered a generation of guerilla girls to TAKE BACK THE BATHROOM from sprayers, hoverers, and TP-decorators? Please, design folks! We need you!

Hahaha, Miko, brilliant!!

It's been two hours since the signs went up and I have to wonder if it isn't some kind of quasi-exhibitionistic fetish as I swear there was twice as much pee on the seat.

It's as though we have a pee flaming urine troll attacking the loo.

Uh... maybe I should have warned you before you put any signs up.

There are only 3 or 4 women who use our bathroom regularly, although on occasions we have several guests and clients using them. A woman put up bathroom ettiquette signs once. Once.

They were met with ridicule, sign-ripping-down, and a sort of a witch-hunt of retribution. It was Not Pretty.

For some reason, when grown women are scolded, we turn into crazy people. Crazy!

Let me say that the WHOOSH theory only holds water if the same thing happens in men's rooms-- and I can assure you it doesn't. This is why I'm a fan of urinals.

muddgirl: the response to such ridicule should have been a very loud, very shrill, "Are you seriously defending your right to pee on the seat? Are you a seat-pee-er? ARE YOU? ARE YOU THE SEAT-PEE-ER, CHRISTINE?"

As in poker, sometimes you have to come right back over the top to win.

Wipe the goddamn seat with TP, drop the TP in before you flush, flush, then wash your mother-plucking hands.

There is very little that gets so dirty that it can't be cleaned.

Well, in our case, it was the allegation that "someone wasn't flushing the toilet - how gross!"

Except, really, it was because we had low flow toilets, and sometimes newbies would rush out without thinking about the second flush. In other words, a woman got all offended over a perceived "non-flusher" that didn't exist.

I think that the increasing prevalence of auto-flush toilets is responsible for the dreaded rise in the nonflusher population. We're getting so used to not needing to flush, that some people don't even bother anymore.

I disapprove.

I had to try very hard not to laugh at a woman the other day who kept waving her hand under the faucet and looking confused and somehow not noticing the very large handle things right next to the faucet.

Amen to that, plinth!

Good point, mudpuppie. I hadn't thought of that. On that note, I've noticed that if you move wrong and accidentally activate the auto-flush while still seated, it can damned near serve as a bidet. A very cold, less than optimal bidet, at that.

occhiblu, I once watched a guy walk full stride into a door, having mistaken it for an automatic one. Unfortunately, I was incapable of rising above my baser sense of humor and instead laughed and laughed. Bad Frisbee.

No, good Frisbee.

I had an odd seat pee-ing moment on New Year's Eve. I was waiting for a stall, a normal looking girl came out, saw me waiting, and then went back into the stall, as she said "To see if I left any pee on the seat." Why she would only do this because she saw someone waiting and not as a matter of course escaped me, and why she was willing to admit it was even stranger.

Consider this:

As a hoverer a lady is so disgusted by toilet related things that she will not sit on the seat. It should not be suprising that this person would be highly unlikely to wipe the seat after them, which would increase her proximity to 'disgusting' matter and involve having to look and think about it. Better to run away, run away.

Putting the seat up would probably have to involve taking sheets of toilet roll to act as a buffer between one's hands and the seat. It should be possible though! However, I would have thought that they would also want to return the seat to horizontal after the event, in order that the following toileteer not discover their idiosyncratic behaviour. This would require further interaction with the disgusting object which could be too much to bear...

Pity those that cannot enjoy a relaxing excretion. And then laugh at their insecurities.

It would also make sense that a visiting lady would be more likely to hover in an unfamiliar cubicle.

Maybe there should be a big sign that just says:
HOLD IT!
If it's too gross to sit on, you shouldn't even be here

Yeah, the women who are too precious to sit on the toilet, and think it's fine to leave pee for the next person really piss me off. (why, yes, that pun was intended.) It's so very nice to have clean water, flush toilets and modern sanitation; why do people have to be knuckleheads?

Meanwhile, you have stupid, seat-peeing clients and normal, pee in the toilet clients. Get a container of wipes for each stall. Even if the pee-on-the-seaters don't use them, the next gal can. Does anybody actually use seat covers?

Miko's idea is genius; it would make an excellent design project.

Update: 8 office sized pots of coffee and over three hours into the day, barely a drop is on the seats or the floor. Signs are still up and not a tearful recrimination or spiteful hiss is to be heard.

Yay for ladies with good manners!!