MetaChat - Damn! Damn! Damn!

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20 November 2007

Damn! Damn! Damn! →[More:]

It's my friend Alycia's 13th AA anniversary today so I emailed her to send my congratulations.

She emailed me back to say she started drinking again a few weeks ago.

I am heartbroken for her. She's a wonderful woman, a cancer survivor (double mastectomy) and she's been through some tough, tough times without drinking.

I've seen lots of people go back out drinking again, and in my experience, the longer they've been sober, the harder it is for them to stop again.

There's an AA saying: Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

I fear for her.

post by: essexjan at: 17:57 | 11 comments

Awww :-(

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 20 November | 17:58

Poor thing.

posted by redvixen 20 November | 19:17

I do have a friend who went through AA and was sober for about 20 years. He drinks again now, but with extreme moderation, and has done for at least five years. He's OK. Of course, he's one story, and I know more people who have a more negative story to tell about slipping. But maybe it won't be the end of the world....it might not work for you, but as you know everyone has to find their own path.

posted by Miko 20 November | 19:20

Here's hoping it goes like meeks' friend.

posted by chewatadistance 20 November | 20:15

Well, is she drinking or is she boozing? There's a difference. AA is a great program and it's saved countless lives, but total abstinence isn't for everybody. I did 7 months in AA, until I decided that it really wasn't for me and I have yet to have any alcohol related disasters since. Maybe it's the same for your friend.

posted by jonmc 20 November | 20:17

Oh, Jan, I'm so sorry to hear this.

posted by By the Grace of God 20 November | 20:30

I'm so sorry, jan. That's so sad especially after such a long time sober.

I thank the stars that sobriety seems to be holding in all my family members, especially my mum who's still trying to get on the right drug for her depression. She's been sober 29 years.

posted by deborah 20 November | 20:59

Echoing what other people have said, that's a long and hard time sober. I can't imagine the effect that it must have on her friends who've been through AA with her, which I understand can be a deeply bonding and profound experience. Even if you didn't do AA with her specifically, I suspect it might feel rather personal to you, outside your obvious concern for her well being. Take care of yourself.

posted by Lassie 20 November | 21:44

Look at it this way... If she is drinking to excess and hasn't managed to handle moderation, then today she lost the struggle. But tomorrow is another chance to start over. You can be there to support her in that.

posted by kellydamnit 21 November | 00:15

Apparently it started out as a glass of wine when she was on a trip to Montreal. Now she's drinking in the morning, just a few weeks later. She's just moved 300 miles away from home and is lonely. I think it will be good for her to go to 'new' AA in a new place where she doesn't know people from her 'old' sobriety. She said she's trying to get back to meetings.

I hope she makes it.

posted by essexjan 21 November | 02:19

It's bad she's started drinking, but it's good she's being open about it. I hope she doesn't drift back into alcoholism, but if she does I hope that she's able to do something about it.

I've known two people who have drunk themselves to death. Alcoholism is a terrible disease.

posted by seanyboy 21 November | 02:22

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