MetaChat - Speed Dating Advice

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23 October 2007

Speed Dating Advice I got talked into speed dating tonight, so hit me with your best possible speed dating advice, bunnies. →[More:]Do you think I should open with something like "Don't you think that all Republicans should be clubbed to death like baby seals?" or "Whoa! What is that weird growth on your forehead?"

post by: mygothlaundry at: 12:26 | 22 comments

How about: "Tell me about your dark side..." You'll learn a lot from their response.

posted by mightshould 23 October | 12:34

I love speed-dating! It's hilarious.

I have no advice though. Except don't ask "what do you do?" cause no-one wants to have that conversation 40 times in a row (but you knew that).

posted by crush-onastick 23 October | 12:38

Just be funny. That should a breeze for you.

posted by chuckdarwin 23 October | 12:50

Shout "OK GO!" Then keep yelling out time like a game show - "THIRTY SECONDS!" "TEN SECONDS!" "HURRY UP! DAAAAATE!"

I so can't wait to read about this on your blog.

posted by rainbaby 23 October | 13:02

Depends on your goals, or lack thereof. If you are looking for long-term or just someone to hang with, say so up front.

posted by mischief 23 October | 13:47

I think you should think of the most ludicrous things you can think of and open with those (think of a few and bust out one for each guy/gal). You can tell a lot about a person by their reaction when caught off guard.

posted by LunaticFringe 23 October | 14:05

1. Get an empty container that's labeled Vanax, Valium, Prozac, or sumthin' like that.

2. Fill it with Tic Tacs.

3. If there is an awkward part of any conversation, whip this out of your purse, tear off the cap, and let a few pour into your mouth, without bothering to count.

4. "Now, where were we?"

posted by danf 23 October | 14:12

Speed Dating Advice

Grind it up and snort it. It kicks in faster. The date will last all night. What? Oh. Never mind.

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 October | 14:32

I think from now on I will wait more than a few minutes after waking to post comments. This flew right over my head.

posted by mischief 23 October | 14:53

Two things:

1. If you like the person, talk really, really fast. If you don't, talk really, really slow.

2. I'm reluctant to share this, because it's my own personal parachute for awkward social situations, but I like you MGL, and I don't mind if you use it. I know it's "speed" dating and all, but that doesn't mean you're not going to encounter some schmo who talks forever about things that don't interest you. (By the way, I perfected this technique on a marine biology grad student whose specialty was warm-water algae.) So, if Dude goes on and on and you want it to be done with, at the first possible (in)opportunity, with a very straight face, say "I'm considering changing the brand of cat foot I buy."

And bingo. You're free.

posted by mudpuppie 23 October | 15:07

Mudpuppie: you are the awesomest!

posted by crush-onastick 23 October | 15:15

If that doesn't cause their eyes to glaze over, launch into a diatribe against the feline prosthetics industry as a wing of the Military Industrial Complex, and explain in minute detail your design for a home-made cat foot, assembled using duct tape, baling wire, velcro, spray paint, sparkles, and maybe macaroni, which is capable of jamming all listening devices in a 100' radius.

posted by elizard 23 October | 15:16

Mudpuppie buys cat feet?

The type bring the fog in, or the more grisly kind?

*shudder*

ya think ya know someone. . .

posted by danf 23 October | 16:56

Huh. I totally missed the typo and thought elizard was just being silly. I blame the oncoming head cold, yes I do.

posted by mudpuppie 23 October | 16:59

mudpuppie knows how many cat feet there are in a yard.

I so can't wait to read about this on your blog.

What rainbaby said!

posted by BoringPostcards 23 October | 17:32

Based on this unofficial poll, most of us wouldn't last 5 minutes at an event like that (unless it was just MeChazens. Then it would be hilarious). If you start to get nervous, just think of what a cock-up we'd make of it and how breathtakingly suave you are by comparison. Good luck--hope you have fun! *makes note to check mgl's blog tomorrow*

posted by elizard 23 October | 19:12

"Don't you think that all Republicans should be clubbed to death like baby seals?"

How about instead:
"Don't you think that all Republicans should be clubbed to death with baby seals?"

I don't think there was speed dating when I was still on the hunt. I don't know that I would've gotten into it.

Then again, I saw some friends last week who told me that I inform people against their will.

posted by plinth 23 October | 19:13

Ooh, Mechazen speed dating. For some reason, I kinda like that idea.

*lingers at elizard's table*

And mgl, I've got one word for you, or maybe two: live-blogging.

posted by box 23 October | 21:09

Ooh, Mechazen speed dating. For some reason, I kinda like that idea.

Ladies and gentlemen (and the rest of you), I present the first activity at Burning Bunny! *winks at box*

posted by elizard 23 October | 22:00

I'm all for MeChaZen speed dating. Start a thread! Figure out how it works! I'm beyond that.

posted by Miko 23 October | 22:06

I'm with Miko. Somebody figure it out and lets do it.

posted by rainbaby 24 October | 00:02

Down here, we don't get too fancy, and just call speed dating "$1 draft night" at the local bars. Some bar is having one, every dang night.

posted by paulsc 24 October | 20:30

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