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27 September 2007
Things Not to Say On Your First Day of Work→[More:]"It's only 3 o'clock?!? I feel like I've been here forever!" Do not say this at all, and especially do not say it if you arrived to the office at noon.
On my third day at a job I had several years ago, I stepped on my editor's dog, who was in the office because he was sick and had to have medicine every few hours.
The editor is now one of my best friends, but I don't think her Shih Tzu ever really forgave me.
It wasn't something I said, but what I did. The server was kept in my boss' office, behind some caution tape. I was sitting on a stool, and got off. Stool kicked back and landed smack on the rocker-style power button on the server.
"Well, there's the nigger in the woodpile!" (a former tech of mine discovers a problem in a server configuration - he lasted about a day and a half. This came from him at a client site.)
See, TPS, each one of those is what my old boss would refer to as a "career limiting move." Looking into my magic crystal (okay, 8-) ball, I'm failing to see a bright future for this person, somehow. Man, those things are uncanny.
An aquaintance of mine was training a new person at her workplace. As his supervisor, she was mentoring this young and enthusiastic type boy. She was explaining some technical blahblah to him when he asked her if anyone in the office was "gay or retarded or anything"so he'd know who not to tell offensive jokes around.
Little did he know he was talking to the office lesbian with the mild mental illness.