God help me, I thought that said "taste yer boss."

And the answer was No.

Oh hell yes. Not my current boss; she's really cool. The guy before her though... I'd taze the holy living fuck out of him. Repeatedly.

But I'm not vindictive.

I had a boss I wanted to taste but I was in a relationship so I didn't.

I had a boss I wanted to taser but I did not want to go to jail so I didn't do that either.

No fun.

Oh, I'm so sending that to my boss today.

I never had a boss I wanted to taste, but I had a couple who wanted to taste me. They were otherwise nice, though, so I didn't taser them.

I had one completely insane boss that I would have tasered to kingdom come (whatever that means) who was like BTGoG's boss plus Specklet's boss, plus methamphetamine. Frankly, tasering her would have been a favor to her, because it would have given her at least 30 seconds of her life in which she wasn't running around like the proverbial headless chicken having a panic attack.

I've had many bosses I'd have liked to taser. Like, every square inch of them. In a certain precise order, that they have to guess the next zap site correctly or I start over from the top. That would match their micromanaging insanity torture they doled out daily. Tasting? Uh no. No thanks.

Uh, I can be mean.

woohooo! *LOVES mean chewie*

That, my dear, was a thing of beauty.

Tasers are nice and all, but I've heard that stun guns (similar principle, no wires) are much less pleasant.

That's a great idea; we should have taser day here in my office, wherein everyone gets a taser gun and tasers the colleague of their choice.

I'd bring one of those shotguns that shoots beanbags, incapacitate everybody one by one, relieve them all of their tasers, and as they started to move back to their desks, I'd taser them with their own guns, take their wallets, drop the tasers in the incinerator, and go have a long lunch and probably take in a show, depending on how much cash they had on hand.

Maybe I'd take a Circle Line cruise. My office-mayhem daydreams usually end in me going and doing touristy shit, like spending the afternoon eating at Carnegie Deli or watching basketball at the West 4th Street cage. Lemon Ice King of Corona, anyone?

woohooo! *LOVES mean chewie*

That, my dear, was a thing of beauty.
posted by taz 06 September | 08:18

* beaming proudly *

Frankly, tasering her would have been a favor to her, because it would have given her at least 30 seconds of her life in which she wasn't running around like the proverbial headless chicken having a panic attack.

Exaaaaaactly.

I'd use a taser on my boss, but I'd have to do it before lunch. Cause after lunch the bottle of wine or three martinis he drank would keep him from noticing. It's great making sure every bit of business I need him for gets done before 11:15 everyday.

This is why so many of you have pseudonyms, isn't it?