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19 August 2007

Hidden key strategy. I have to come up with a clever hidden key idea for getting into my house if locked out... [More:]

I had to climb in through an open window today (by balancing one chair on top of another - yikes), after leaving my keys inside. If I had been running the AC at the time, the window would have been closed, and I would have been in trouble, since mr. taz is out of town, all my neighbors are out of town, and the friend who has an extra key is out of town. (I told you I was the last person left in Athens.)

I haven't decided what to do yet, but I'll do it tomorrow, to be safe. In the meantime, I'd like to tell you the story of my old hidden key for my last place:

We were on the top floor of the building, and on our landing, opposite our apartment, was a locked door that led to the rooftop, where there were storage areas. So, at the termination of the stair handrail (wrought iron, painted black) I taped on the underside a small key to our mailbox, using black electricians' tape. It was completely invisible, unless you knew it was there. In the mailbox, I left an old junk-mail envelope that looked unopened - something totally uninteresting, in the event someone broke into our mailbox, and inside I put a key to the rooftop door. On the rooftop, I put a key to our apartment inside a removable bit of metal that was part of a window frame on one of those storage sheds.

So, even if any of those keys were found (the one on the rooftop would never be found, unless serious demolition was going on), the whole trail would be pretty invisible. I never had to use it, but it made me feel more secure knowing that I'd never have to sleep on my landing while waiting for a locksmith to open for business. :)

This spot is entirely different, and will call for something of a different nature, that I haven't figured out yet. Got any fun hidden-key or locked-out stories to tell? (Don't reveal any current hidden keys, unless you know for sure your address cannot be in any way deduced!)
Someday when I have a house with a yard of my own, I'm going to bury a key.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 19 August | 18:08
Those are some awesome key hiding spots!

In NH, when my brother and I were latchkey kids, we had a few good spots (as we were ALWAYS losing/forgetting our keys). We had one of those "fake rocks" for a while, mixed in with a few hundred real rocks under our front porch. We also at some point had a piece of bark which had a little hollow for a key (which I believe my brother just found and decided a key would fit in there), which we would wedge into the fork of a tree.

Leaving a key in the mailbox was the standard way at my old apartment. Sometimes in an envelope, sometimes just sitting there under the mail. It seems unsafe, but it's Toronto. If someone's going to break into my house I bet they're not going to look for a key first.

Other good spots - light fixtures, underneath steps, stuck beside a specific plant or tree. I remember leaving the key to my apartment for a friend who was visiting and arrived before I got out of work. I left it in the ashcan out front of my apartment in Florida. I stuck the key in the sand in the bottom and put the cigarette butts back on top. Gross, but no one would look there, and all my friend had to do was turn over the can into the other big ashcan (one was metal, one was terra cotta).
posted by SassHat 19 August | 18:20
I mainly don't lock my door. That's my plan. Small city life has it's pluses! One of these days, I'll probably get paranoid and start locking again. I do lock my car, unless I forget, and leave all the windows open!
posted by richat 19 August | 18:21
While this is all clever and good - any decent and motivated burgler isn't going to go hunting for your spare key for much longer than 60 seconds. They'll look under the mat or in the unlocked mail box or under a flowerpot.

Then they'll either kick in your flimsy door or window - or simply pick the lock.

Which is trivially easy, once you know what you're doing.

No, seriously. Most common keyed locks take about 5-15 seconds to open once you've practiced a little bit. And by "a little bit" I mean maybe a couple of hours of practice.

It's not magician's slight-of-hand. It's not like flying a plane. It takes extremely little skill once you have the concept in mind. Monkeys can be trained to do it.


Keyed locks only provide an illusion of security.

Which, as we've learned in many real world object lessons over the past century, is much worse than no security at all.
posted by loquacious 19 August | 18:28
Heh. True enough, but my doors are self-locking anyway (then you can lock them further with the key), which was the cause of my trouble today - so I do need to hide a key for myself.
posted by taz 19 August | 18:52
I think what loq says is pretty true. In NJ and Philly I was always told a deadbolt slid from the inside was the only thing that would prevent entry.

I have a key in my car for convenience, but sometimes I've gone running and locked myself out accidentally. In those cases I do what a burglar would probably do -- wiggle my hand under the screen/storm window, trip the window mechanism dealie, and pull the window up from outside.

That worked for us as latchkey kids, too, though we were always getting yelled at for the way it bent the screen window.
posted by Miko 19 August | 18:53
I always meant to hide a key to my place, but could never decide where (this is the place I'm moving out of Tuesday, so the issue now nugatory). I most regretted not having done anything about this on the memorable occasion when I locked myself out on a twelve-below-zero Christmas Eve morning, when my landlords were out of town. Fortunately, I got to the neighborhood hardware store before they closed; they got me in touch with a wonderful old-school Minnesota-Scandinavian locksmith, who drove up, got me in, gave me many good wishes of the holiday season and a business calendar, and drove off. When I discovered an hour later that, in all the confusion and exchanging of good wishes, I hadn't gotten my credit card back from him after paying, I managed to reach him on the phone just before he closed up shop and went home for the holiday, and he insisted on driving *back* up to return it, apologizing profusely. He was a sweetie, and it all turned out well, but I think when I've got a place to live in Seattle, I'm just going to make sure that at least three people have copies of my key, because oy.
posted by kat allison 19 August | 19:42
So if what loq says is true, then (assuming I'm not going to invest in serious security measures and/or a large, mean dog) I really shouldn't bother locking my doors? I dunno about that . . .

Sure a locked door won't keep the more determined burglars out, but surely there are less determined ones who are looking for an easy target . . . ?
posted by treepour 19 August | 19:45
I really shouldn't bother locking my doors? I dunno about that . . .

That would be a very simplistic analysis of what I said.

I was merely pointing out that traditional locks and keys are little more than "peace of mind" and "trust" devices.

But if you analyze a traditional mechanical lock from a pure security standpoint they're terrible.

They give too much peace of mind, there's too much trust placed in them, and it's almost impossible to identify when they've been tampered with or bypassed.

You'd be better off sealing your door with a piece of tape with your signature or other monograph written on it. At least then you'd actually know if someone broke the seal.

Placing spare keys outside for one's own convenience when accidently locked out by the (dumb, mechanical) lock is a whole different sort of thing.

I was arguing that going to too great of lengths to encode your key-hiding methods was probably pretty useless in the grand scheme of things. Namely - especially considering how easy it is to pick locks. (Which is a much easier puzzle to solve from the start.)
posted by loquacious 19 August | 20:01
We kept every single found key from every single junk drawer in the house on a keychain that hung in the garage. About 30 keys. The one for the front door wasn't marked or distinctive, but the one for the house was roughly in the centre. Once you had a ballpark and knew what to look for, no problem. If you were a burglar, you'd be screwed! It's lost now because someone had to use it and it never made it back out to the garage. Also, there are many easy ways to get into my house, including a sticky lock on the front door. Oh, well. My neighbours are always home on either side so someone would have a hard time breaking in without anyone seeing.
posted by typewriter 19 August | 20:01
What I can tell you is that a determined burglar will get in and get what s/he wants. I can also tell you that in my neighborhood, the ones that try to break in aren't determined burglars - they're (in order from most to least common) kids or drunks or crack heads, so they go for the easy targets. Anything unlocked is easy by definition.

The best spot for a hidden key is a place that is out of direct view.

I've locked myself out of a few places and have broken in myself if I've had the tools. One place I went in through a window in a place that was in direct view of the street and most of the neighbors. I'm still surprised I didn't get a visit from the police.
posted by plinth 19 August | 20:06
Locks only keep honest people out. For any self-respecting thief, the average door lock is merely an inconvenience.

We are putting a fingerprint-activated deadlock on the front door of our new house and there will be no direct access to the mechanical part of the lock from outside the door - I'm not sure if it's any more secure, but it will be pretty cool to be able to lock and unlock the door in this way and that's what really matters ;-)
posted by dg 19 August | 20:08
Nice story, katallison!

oooh, dg! How fun!

I just put a key outside in a not-final hiding spot, because I figured I'm tempting fate by talking about it and telling stories and saying I'm going to do it tomorrow, blah blah. How silly would it be to lock myself out before hiding a key after all this song and dance? Also, I don't think I could get loquacious over here to pick my lock in less than 12 hours, and I'll be dying to use the bathroom by then.
posted by taz 19 August | 20:10
plinth: I called the police once because I saw a guy climbing through the window. They didn't seem to care that much.
posted by grouse 19 August | 20:11
in my neighborhood, the ones that try to break in aren't determined burglars - they're (in order from most to least common) kids or drunks or crack heads, so they go for the easy targets.

When I lived in New Orleans, I swear that if it wasn't locked, we would have had tourists walking in the front door. Some of them just didn't "get" that people were actually living in those cute houses in the French Quarter. One day I walked from the kitchen to the living room to see a couple on my porch, pressed up against the window trying to peer inside. Creepy.

We also had tons of drunks, crack heads, and during Sugar bowl, Frat guys. I believe everyone should keep their doors locked just on account of frat guys. I think there's also some kind of spray you can use around the perimeter of your property to keep them away.
posted by taz 19 August | 20:31
I used to sneak over to my first boyfriend's place a lot early in the morning on the weekends, and he kept a key for me on the inside of his windowsill. To get in, all I'd have to do is get up on my tiptoes and reach in the open window, pull the key off its pushpin, and unlock the front door.

One day, though, it had rained the night before and his window was closed. Luckily, he told me the other way to get into his place, which was to go into his grandma's backyard next door and through the connecting gate. From there, I could get to his back door in the kitchen where they had a doggie door for his mother's English sheepdog. It was "locked" though, via a board that they slid into place at night... which of course a resourceful person could slowly and quietly slide upwards, lift out, and carefully lay it on the floor.

Then, a small person such as myself could go in through the doggie door with my right leg first, bent in half and twisted so that my butt went in next, then my torso and head, and then my left leg.

All without bruising or scraping anything, and being quieter than a mouse.
posted by TrishaLynn 19 August | 20:33
Like richat, I leave my front door unlocked when I leave the house half the time. Don't tell my husband.

I've been locked out as a latchkey kid more than once. I have memories of sitting on the front porch , waiting for the parents to arrive. Oddly this wasn't until I was a teen. As a tween I was more responsible with my key.

I've fetched the paper in my pajamas only to discover that I'd been locked out by my own children. It's a desperate feeling to plead with a three-year old to let mommy in. ;)
posted by LoriFLA 19 August | 21:00
So, TrishaLynn, you get to tell everyone your first boyfriend treated you like a dog ...

We used to have a magnetic thingy inside the garage, which can be opened via keypad. But there are easier ways inside the house including a basement window you can sort of shove out of alignment and then out of the way.

One day, my dad used it to get in when my nephew and one of his "friends" were present. That weekend, the "friend" broke into the house that way to steal my nephew's Yugi-Oh card set.

Oh, the key thing? No idea. You sound like a more creative person than anyone here. ;-)

And security just means being more secure than the place next door, right? Like only needing to run faster than the next camper -- not a bear.
posted by stilicho 19 August | 21:05
On both my vehicles, I keep a set of keys for both vehicles and house keys for both houses. They're wrapped in plastic baggies, and taped to the tops of the frames of the vehicles using fiberglas tape. There is enough mud and road film on these areas that you'd have to be very familiar with vehicle frames, and looking very, very carefully to recognize that they are not factory frame profiles, from the underside of the vehicles, with your nose 6 inches from the keys.

2 blocks from my main house, a good hearted gal keeps another set of house keys, just in case. The alarm system and my dog that doesn't like the smell of her cats on her clothes keeps her honest. My brother, a certified madman of sweet and gentle disposition, generally, who is well known in the neighborhood, with access to a number of Mossberg 590 shotguns, and a propensity for odd hours, keep the neighbors respectful. Gettin' in my house, for me, takes a good 3 minutes, if I haven't lost my key, for good reason. When both my brother and me (and the dog) go out together, getting back in the house is somewhat faster, since we don't need to recognize one another (or pass the dog's inspection).

Defense in depth is our philosophy. We've yet to have problems of any kind with strangers. Our friends and relatives make sure to call ahead, when they are coming. We've been asked, more than once, to keep valuable things for other people, but we don't, not wanting the responsibility.

And I agree with loquacious that relying on locks for security is not a good strategy. Since I work from home, and am around a lot, I've picked the locks on 3 of the 8 nearest neighbor's houses, in the last two years, at the request of their kids, who only begged me not to tell their parents. I figure if anyone in the neighborhood gets robbed, the cops are coming here first, but I've got nothing to hide.
posted by paulsc 19 August | 21:57
Last time I locked myself out I found out that one of my window locks is busted. I left it that way, because entry by that window puts a person smack dab into the area covered by the motion sensor that sets off my security system. And also, the lock doesn't look broken, so you would have to actually try pushing the window to get it open.
posted by Doohickie 19 August | 22:26
Maybe hide it in a MeCha Emcee? Post the Emcee to MeCha. Nobody'll ever think to look there.

;-)
posted by shane 19 August | 22:51
paulsc, I can't tell if you're kidding or not.
posted by shane 19 August | 22:54
paulsc, that clip is one hell of a way to toss the salad before dinner.
posted by trondant 19 August | 23:13
A few years back we had a mentally handicapped girl living in our neighborhood, and she was going into people's unlocked houses and taking showers, and she'd take something from one house and leave it in the driveway at another. Lock your doors!
posted by IndigoRain 20 August | 00:39
I don't worry too much about security because my neighbors have better stuff to steal than I do. My PC and stereo are old. I have no TV or jewelry.

I keep a spare key to my house inside my car. I have a spare key to my car magneted on my car in one of the 4 places everyone else in the universe uses. In these days of mostly-plastic cars you don't have a lot of magnet options. It would be hard to tell which apartment building my car belongs to, since it's parked on the street, and it would be hard to tell which apartment once you got through the front door.

If I had a gun collection I would feel obliged to be much more secure.

Security though obscurity, and no problems so far.

On a side note, there seems to be less theft here than in my last neighborhood, which was ritzy liberal. And notoriously anti-gun. You rip someone off in Oakland, and you'd better mean it. Or be really high, I guess.
posted by small_ruminant 20 August | 11:57
I am guessing paulsc isn't kidding, because a lot of people where I grew up have similar security systems.
posted by small_ruminant 20 August | 11:57
I just have a screenshot of that bayoneted cabbage on my unlocked front door; nobody bother me!
posted by Hugh Janus 20 August | 12:22
I'm on the opposite end of the security spectrum than paulsc. When I'm home, the doors are double dead-bolted from the inside. Otherwise, I rely on locks or sometimes nothing at all. My belongings are covered by renter's insurance in case of theft, and nothing I own costs more than $500 (my new refridgerator), besides my car.

In other words, I'm not afraid of theft, I'm afraid of B&E that ends with me getting shot or raped or something.
posted by muddgirl 20 August | 12:44
Locks only keep honest people out, that is certainly true.
posted by ikkyu2 20 August | 14:07
I have a porch door and a front door. The front door's on a latch and the porch door is on a bolt. I've locked myself in my porch by accident (once). That was embarrassing. Luckily, I keep a spare set of keys with friends, so they were able to come and save me.
posted by seanyboy 21 August | 01:22
I'm resigning from the job tomorrow. || Personal canon

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