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Each time the cat does not eat, it creates a parallel universe where it does eat. Simply accelerate the cat to the speed of light (I recommend the swing-by-the-tail method) to shift one universe over. Problem solved.
Cats CAN starve themselves to death. It's not the lack of food that kills them, but Fatty Liver Disease. I learned this the hard way after almost losing my feral cat. So fwiw, your advice, and that of most of the responders to the original post, and that of the poster's vet sucks. Force feeding may be in order.
It's much funnier on the front page, without all the [more inside] to distract from the poster's name.
And cortex, you're welcome for the restraint. I knew my jokey comment would be deleted as not helpful, so I took it to MetaChat! Whee! Playing by the rules is almost as fun as quantum physics!
"Of course it's stupid advice - it's a joke." I get that kyleg's response is a joke. I'm just pointing out that the rest of the advice may not be good.
It's hard to tell what people mean as serious and what they mean as a joke. The response of people to that kind of question can be really fucking stupid so I thought you were serious. It didn't help that cortex mentioned that he'd deleted similar responses. Just pretend I did a funny dance with a hat and cane after my first response. TA-DA!
But accelerating a cat's molecules to that speed would cause the cat to heat up to temperatures off the scale! How would you compensate? posted by MonkeyButter
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