I don't, as a rule, pray If I were to break my normal habit, and post a pony request for an imaginary sky person (who, if he does exist, merely regards us with icy disdain from his mysterious ivory tower) it would be this: →[More:]MAKE IT STOP FUCKING RAINING! GODDAMN IT! WE'RE FUCKING DROWNING IN THIS PISS! FUCKING BOLLOCKS! SHIT!

[wait, that may be a tad strident]

Really, man; we're cool on the rain. We GET IT. You're all pissed off about this carbon thing. Message received, your worshipfulness. You can stop now. Um, it's almost August.

[damn, he probably hears that shit all the time]

DO NOT WANT. WE CAN HAS DRY WEATHER?

[too hip, probably]

I'm trying to be carbon neutral. Really, I am. I don't own an SUV, I don't fly to Spain with the rest of my relatives, I recycle and reuse, I'm even going to buy a wormery because I don't have room to compost. Can't people like me - you know, people who actually give a fuck about the planet - have a little summer up in this bitch?

Please?