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13 July 2007

Like, Totally Gnarly, Dude One day, I went to the doctor to have a cyst removed. It was a big old lump on the top of my head, and was noticable. Plus, it was irritating my wife, so it had to go.

[More:]When I got to the place, the dermatologist had a student in the suite with her. I don't usually mind this, and it was hardly a difficult procedure (given a scalpel and a mirror, I probably could've followed her directions and done it myself). They hit me with lidocaine and told me that they didn't have to shave my head, which as a relief.

Anyway, skater boy / student doctor guy was cutting away on my scalp and the teacher lady said: "OK, now we're in. See that sac? Don't pierce it."

"EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" said skater doc. He had accidently pierced the sac and smelly pus came out.

"DON'T SAY EWWW IN FRONT OF A PATIENT!" scolded teacher doc.

"OK, sorry." I couldn't see any of this, but had a hard time not giggling even though they were cutting my head open.

So, that's it. My gross story for today.
Yeah, when I was a sophmore in college I started to notice this bump on the rear side of my left knee. It didn't hurt or anything, so I mostly ignored it, unaware at the time of the existence of cysts.

So, one day I was sitting on the pissoir and sort of pulled the skin around that area tight to get a better look at it.

The damn thing exploded with said smelly pus, seemed like tons of it, and myself, my roommate, and the other two we shared a bathroom with (inbetween our two dorm rooms) had to vacate until the smell cleared. Totally totally disgusting.
posted by tr33hggr 13 July | 07:50
When I was 12, 13 or so I had a standard vaccination at school to prevent TB. It became infected and turned into an abscess, on the fleshiest part of my upper arm.

It ended up as this huge hole, bigger than a golf ball, that kept bursting, filling up, bursting, over a period about six months. My school blouse would be stuck to my arm with the gunk and when I peeled it off it would release more gunk. Then it'd kind of heal, until it was again full of vile, stinking fluid, and then burst again.

It was horrible. And I still remember the graffiti the bullies drew of me with this big hole in my arm. Yeah, schooldays, best days of your fucking life, right? My sister used to grab my arm and punch me right on that spot, deliberately, which can't have helped much either.

Eventually it healed, but there's still a faint scar, about an inch-and-a-half across, on my upper arm.

And it never occurred to either of my parents that I might need to see a doctor about this.

posted by essexjan 13 July | 08:06
Wait.

Are ALL cysts filled with pus!?

/has a few in various locations on his nek
posted by CitrusFreak12 13 July | 13:03
Not necessarily. According to Wikipedia

A cyst may also be a sack that encloses an organism during a dormant period, such as in the case of certain parasites.

So, nothing to worry about, CF.
posted by essexjan 13 July | 13:36
A sebaceous cyst like mine is actually filled with FAT, so I'm told. Hence the smell.
posted by chuckdarwin 13 July | 14:00
(Aside to cd: You can have the sac's contents made into perkier breasts, I understand.)
posted by rob511 14 July | 01:56
When I was around 17 or so, I somehow injured my elbow. It became infected, and when I couldn't lean on the desk at school, the school nurse took one look and told me to go to my doctor. I had blood poisoning, my elbow was so swollen that the skin was tight, and it was swollen up to my upper arm and down to my wrist. The doctor told me to go home (after giving me a prescription), apply a wet washcloth to the area, wrap plastic around it, cover it with a heating cloth, and do this frequently. So I did, and I actually felt it pop. Then I was instructed to keep bending my elbow, to get the infection out. Ewwwww. Bend elbow, watch the ooze. Even grosser when I was out to dinner and it decided to pop and ooze on it's own.
posted by redvixen 15 July | 19:12
I, jason's_planet, award to all of you:


THE GOLDEN GNARLY

Everyone's a winner tonite!
posted by jason's_planet 15 July | 19:49
MOTHERFUCKING CAB DRIVERS || It's Photo Friday!

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