Go to the record store, pick up either Magma, "Attahk," or Ground Zero, "Revolutionary Pekinese Opera, Version 1.28." There's a slight chance you'll love these records from the get-go, but it's more likely they'll be an acquired taste. Don't let on that you've never heard them before (this may be somewhat difficult -- just avoid giggling).

Or listen to some Mystere des Voix Bulgares or those Alan Lomax recordings of Italian fishermen at top volume; they're beautiful, but they drive some people up the wall.

Maybe you can get some of the Finance guys over to put commas in that 654,328,987,762,345,987 for you and then, while they're working on that, switch all their coffee with Sanka. Then when they become drowsy around 11:00 you can sneak in and replace their Nimoy with Sanka, too. Unless that big number is actually a code sequence directed at a mystery Mechanism and this whole post is just a vessel for a top secret communiqué.

Hmmm... the plot thickens.

You know me... I say counter with the power of Wing. Blast her version of "Close to You" right at them & they'll do anything you say if you'll just turn it off.

I feel for you, chuckdarwin. Our marketing department, who's door is exactly 8 feet away from me, has lately taken a shine to a "funny" cd of swing music renditions of modern pop rock songs. I must have heard that friggin' Paul Anka-fied version of "Must be the Nookie" ten times in the past week! Novelty records, grumble grumble...