MetaChat - THIS IS YET ANOTHER SHOUTING THREAD!

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14 June 2007

THIS IS YET ANOTHER SHOUTING THREAD! →[More:]LOOK, BUDDY. YOU'VE BEEN HITTING ON ME FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS NOW. *YOU* ASKED *ME* OUT, THEN HALFWAY THROUGH OUR DATE YOU DECIDE TO LET ME KNOW THAT YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND OFF-ISLAND? WTFUCKINGFUCK? DO YOU SERIOUSLY EXPECT ME TO BUY THAT THIS WAS THE FIRST CHANCE YOU HAD TO FILL ME IN ON THIS MINOR DETAIL? GET BENT. AND GO FUCK YOURSELF. AND OTHER DIRECTIONS TO VARIOUS UNPLEASANT PLACES THAT I'M TOO MAD TO BE ARTICULATE ABOUT RIGHT NOW. GAH!

post by: elizard at: 00:51 | 26 comments

Dear Miss Elizard:

Might I suggest the evergreen "Stick it up your arse and fuck off while you're doing it"? While I have never had an experience quite like the one you describe, I must say that I've found this expression to be most satisfactory in those moments of frustration I have had the misfortune to encounter.

Yours cordially,

bmarkey

posted by bmarkey 14 June | 01:01

Karma will get him back.

Stab him with a fork just in case!

posted by CitrusFreak12 14 June | 01:05

/me stands behind bmarkey with brass knuckles...

posted by mudpuppie 14 June | 01:05

"Well. That's interesting.

The average woman has three holes a penis might fit into.

You son, are the one between the buttocks."

posted by arse_hat 14 June | 01:07

PS - Upon reflection, I can see where my intial sentence might be misconstrued as an attack upon you, rather than a suggestion of something to fling at the cad in question. I do beg your pardon for not being entirely clear, and for presuming to make such a suggestion in the first place. I only wish to be of service.

Yours respectfully,

bmarkey

posted by bmarkey 14 June | 01:08

Dear bmarkey,

Damnation, how I wish I'd thought of that. Considering that I have most of Withnail and I memorized, it should have sprung springingly to mind. Unfortunately, I was too busy simultaneously shaking my head and picking my jaw up off the floor. I will keep that witty rejoinder stapled to my wrist for future reference, however.

With profound thanks,
elizard

on preview: woo! I gots me a posse, mister. look out.

posted by elizard 14 June | 01:09

YEP. LIVING THE DREAM.

posted by ethylene 14 June | 01:11

*stands behind mudpuppie with baseball bat*

posted by dg 14 June | 01:23

*stands behind dg with monogrammed dueling pistols*

posted by bmarkey 14 June | 01:26

*stands behind dg with monogrammed dueling pistols*

posted by bmarkey 14 June | 01:26

*stands behind dg with monogrammed duelling pistols*

posted by bmarkey 14 June | 01:27

*thrice, no less*

posted by bmarkey 14 June | 01:28

*takes out baseball bat and swings it menacingly*

OKAY THIS SHOUTING THREAD TIFF IS OVER AND ITS TIME TO GET ON WITH SOME FUCKING SHOUTING ALREADY

I'LL START

FUCK ADOBE FUCK ADOBE FUCK ADOBE
ACROBAT SUGGESTS AN UPDATE, THEN TAKES OVER ALL MY BANDWIDTH (128K WI-FI), THEN SPIKES MY PROCESSOR AND DISK AND FREEZES FIREFOX, THEN MAKES ITUNES JUDDER, AND I HAVE TO WATCH HELPLESSLY AS IT INSTALLS PHOTOSHOP ALBUM FREE EDITION OR SOME FUCKED CRAP LIKE THAT, ONLY AFTER WHICH ACROBAT STARTS COMING, AND 15 MINUTES LATER IT ALL STALLS BECAUSE IT CAN'T CLOSE ITS OWN "95% INSTALLED" WINDOW ("PLEASE CLOSE THIS APPLICATION TO CONTINUE: '95% INSTALLED'") AND I HAVE TO TERMINATE FIREFOX LOSING MY PLACE AT YE GODS METAFILTER WHICH WE ALL KNOW IS AN ANNOYANCE BEYOND NOT FINDING YOUR CAR KEYS WHEN YOU HAVE TO GET TO WORK.

posted by stilicho 14 June | 02:37

*SHAKES HER FIST AT FUCKING ADOBE FUCK FUCK*

posted by elizard 14 June | 02:43

I DID MANAGE TO CHANGE THE CAT LITTER, SWEEP THE HALL, AND TIGHTEN MY OFFICE CHAIR

posted by stilicho 14 June | 02:44

DICTIONARY.COM IS A CURSE. FUCK!

posted by Citizen Premier 14 June | 05:53

OOH! OOH! I, TOO, WISH TO BE OF "SERVICE" *WINK WINK*

PS SORRY I MISSED YOU ON IRC LAST NIGHT ELLIE Z!@

posted by Eideteker 14 June | 08:58

Been there, had that happen to me, Elizard. Went out with a guy who was like, we should do this, we should do that, we should go to a baseball game, I go with my female roommate all the time. Later on IM I say, what do your roommates do? Well, uh, I actually don't have any roommates- I live with my fiance and her brother.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 June | 10:06

Is this the thread that we shout out against stupid men and computers?

I support wholeheartedly all your shouting. Shout on.

Elizard you are the awesomest. Fuck that guy. Well, clearly not actually fuck him. You know. "Fuck him".

posted by carmina 14 June | 10:12

STUPID DISHONEST PEOPLE! STUPID COMPUTERS! STAMP STAMP SMASH SMASH!!!!!!!

and TPS, ouch. holy crap. that's...um...really bad.

and awwww, thanks all. y'all really cheered me up.

posted by elizard 14 June | 12:21

FUCKING HOME DEPOT! THEY COULD HAVE EASILY LEFT THE STUFF WITH THE BUILDING STAFF, BUT WOULDN'T! FUCK THE SPOILED PRINCE GIVING THE CRAP ABOUT NEEDING TO DISCUSS THE ISSUE WITH HIS WIFE AND NOT BOTHERING TO DO SO! HIS HOUSE LOOKS LIKE A FUCKING HOTEL...ALL I NEED IS A PICTURE OF THE HALLWAY! FUCKING BRONCHITIS!!! I DON'T WANT TO BE SICK!!! AND I AM NOT A SHIKSA GODDESS!!!

posted by brujita 14 June | 12:22

Haaa, and I just found him on MySpace. Not married (this was several years ago when I met him), just "In A Relationship", and it appears the gf is not in NY. Gee, wonder why the engagement didn't work out?

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 June | 12:26

HERE IS AN OTTER WITH HER BABY! I NEED AN OTTER! A CUTE BABY OTTER JUST LIKE THIS ONE! GET ME ONE NOW!

posted by essexjan 14 June | 12:36

You could always pull his testicle off, you know.

posted by Lipstick Thespian 14 June | 20:09

I NEED AN OTTER! A CUTE BABY OTTER JUST LIKE THIS ONE! GET ME ONE NOW!
Sure, would you like that crumbed or grilled?

posted by dg 14 June | 21:02

I DON'T CARE AS LONG AS IT'S DEEP-FRIED!

posted by essexjan 15 June | 04:05

← Drunk, naked and "embracing" while driving is no way to go through life, son || This wasn't that interesting until I noticed... →

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