MetaChat - Maid it up

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08 June 2007

Maid it up A certain ex of mine is going to be staying in town for two nights later this month because he has to attend a conference. I asked ExMan if he’d like room service and offered to show up at his hotel room door in a French maid outfit. He said no, he finds those costumes so cheesy. I then offered to show up in a genuine maid’s outfit — I’d wear a polyester overall and arrive at his door with a cart stocked with cleaning solvents and rubber gloves. He nixed that idea too and said to just show up. Obviously my creativity is underappreciated in this world.

post by: Orange Swan at: 10:32 | 33 comments

*blows a raspberry toward ExMan and his lack of imagination*

posted by Joe Invisible 08 June | 10:38

*boggles*

posted by jonmc 08 June | 10:39

Yeah, freakin' women with their offering to show up in sexy clothing and all. What are they thinking?

posted by cortex 08 June | 10:44

Show up normal/dressed up, but do knock on the door and say "housekeeping." He'll be scared, then relived to see normal you!

posted by rainbaby 08 June | 10:47

Er, dressed up like, nice dressed up, not as a maid.

posted by rainbaby 08 June | 10:48

cortex: I'm not objecting, it just seems...out of character with the shy, quiet Orange Swan I know. Plus I thought scenarios like that only happened in my movies. Of my exes, well, one would aske me to bring toys for her baby while me and her husband went over old times, another would ask me if I'd accepted Jesus Christ as my persoanl savior and the third would ask me if I knew any cute girls, so the whole thing is outside my frame of reference.

posted by jonmc 08 June | 10:55

A friend of mine has suggested I do the trench coat without much underneath thing, and flash ExMan when he opens the door. I better not tell him about it in advance, though, in case he wet blankets that one too.

posted by Orange Swan 08 June | 10:57

It seems like there is more to this scenario than meets the eye.

posted by Miko 08 June | 10:59

Fuck that, show up dressed as a cop.

posted by Hugh Janus 08 June | 11:01

And arrest him for being a dork.

WHY ARE YOU IN CANADA?

posted by loquacious 08 June | 11:04

Also, why are there so many cute girls in Canada?

posted by loquacious 08 June | 11:06

There are so many cute girls everywhere.

posted by Hugh Janus 08 June | 11:11

My only reaction is that if you DID show up dressed as a maid, and the staff knew that you were not on THEIR staff, they might call the cops (mounties, whatever) and say that there is a prostitute working their building.

Other than that, I have trouble understanding why he's not biting on it.

posted by danf 08 June | 11:16

And if you showed up as a cop (mountie, whatever), they might call all the rooms to tell the prostitutes to leave.

posted by Hugh Janus 08 June | 11:18

Whever people say 'mounties' I always picture this guy:
≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by jonmc 08 June | 11:34

[geek alert] In my teens, I did cast for the local Rocky Horror, which entailed a makeshift maid's uniform. Since I just added the apron and lace cap to a black cocktail dress, my outfit was, ahem, a bit flouffier and racier than Magenta's.

Eventually, my father nicely asked me to wear something over it around the house while I was getting ready to go. I infer that he found the concepts of "maid fantasy" and "daughter" colliding unpleasantly in his head.

posted by Elsa 08 June | 11:34

I'm not objecting

Heh. I didn't even read your comment that way, jonmc—I presumed you were boggling at ExMan. Go figure.

posted by cortex 08 June | 11:37

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Hugh Janus 08 June | 11:41

Show up dressed as a pizza delivery person. They are always welcome.

posted by Triode 08 June | 11:47

they might call the cops and say that there is a prostitute working their building

If hotels did stuff like that, prostitutes would have to go out of business.

Though they might call for security reasons.

posted by Miko 08 June | 11:50

Pizza, now, he would go for.

posted by Orange Swan 08 June | 12:07

Show up dressed as a pizza.

posted by Divine_Wino 08 June | 12:09

what toppings?

posted by jonmc 08 June | 12:16

He sounds like a sad sad man with no sense of fun.

I never get offers like that, dammit.

posted by King of Prontopia 08 June | 12:48

Nobody does, KoP. Not in my experience.

posted by jonmc 08 June | 12:50

Oh, he's lots of fun. The maid idea just doesn't turn his crank, that's all. The trench coat with very little underneath he probably will love, so I'm just going to surprise him. He'd also really love for me to show up with deli sandwiches and or homemade cookies in hand, so that's a possibility too.

posted by Orange Swan 08 June | 13:06

Show up normal/dressed up, but do knock on the door and say "housekeeping." He'll be scared, then relived to see normal you!

Because housekeepers are so scary!

Seriously, what is wrong with this guy?!

I'm not sure why you're offering this tantilizing scenario to an ex, though. What gives?

posted by Specklet 08 June | 13:12

Oh, he's lots of fun. The maid idea just doesn't turn his crank, that's all.

Just the offer of something like that should turn his crank near to breaking, and he has the nerve to be picky! The cad. He obviously doesn't deserve you.

posted by King of Prontopia 08 June | 14:00

But, as Clint Eastwood once said, "deserve ain't got nothing to do with it". Right?

posted by King of Prontopia 08 June | 14:06

He'd also really love for me to show up with deli sandwiches and or homemade cookies in hand, so that's a possibility too.

So make some cookies and show up at his door as a girl scout....

posted by dersins 08 June | 15:40

My ex that i see regularly now likes to do stuff like this...i never complain...ever.

my favorite is a certain skirt and shirt and some other stuff(my memories are kinda fuzzy though as i'm usually NOT thinking about the clothing)

*sigh*
*looks at watch, 6 hours to go*

We are going to go to a rollerskating party tonight and we are totally awesome at rollerskating, so we are totally gonna rock the house.

posted by Schyler523 08 June | 16:21

I think you should save your 'creativity' for what happens after you arrive, ken?

posted by black8 08 June | 18:17

I'm not sure why you're offering this tantilizing scenario to an ex, though. What gives?

I'd much rather be doing stuff like this with a current guy, but there's no one around, so... We have to work with what materials we have.

posted by Orange Swan 08 June | 20:10

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