MetaChat - OMG OMG I CAN'T FIND MY GLASSES!!

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21 May 2007

OMG OMG I CAN'T FIND MY GLASSES!! Got home rather drunk on Saturday night, don't remember what I did with them before falling asleep, and now they're totally MIA. I thought they'd show up at some point during the day yesterday, but no such luck.

Where did I leave them, bunnies? Please send some good find-your-glasses mojo my way! At this point, I'm totally flippin' out!

post by: treepour at: 13:41 | 27 comments

See, I'm so freaked out I forgot to use the More Inside button -- sorry about that!

posted by treepour 21 May | 13:42

They're in the bathroom, sitting on the counter.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 21 May | 13:44

Tear apart your bed. Check in the linens, between the bed and the wall and underneath. You might have fallen asleep with them on.

posted by jrossi4r 21 May | 13:50

Do you have a cat? My cat knocks my glasses under or behind the bed every freakin' night.

Except last night, because I accidentally forgot to let him in from the garage, so he stayed out there all night. Poor guy.

Also, check your face and make sure you're not wearing them.

posted by mudpuppie 21 May | 13:53

Do you have a cat?

I just typed that same question! One of my cats (quite a rascal) will bite, drag and hide eyeglasses, wrist watches, etc.

posted by ericb 21 May | 13:54

Do you have a cat?

I just typed that same question! One of my cats (quite a rascal) will bite, drag and hide eyeglasses, wrist watches, etc.

posted by ericb 21 May | 13:57

Do you live near me? I'm good at finding stuff. I have to be because I am married to someone who isn't.

posted by bunnyfire 21 May | 13:59

They're stuck behind the cushion of your favorite chair.

posted by iconomy 21 May | 14:01

Be sure to update this thread when you find them. I want to know who was right!

posted by jrossi4r 21 May | 14:19

My college roommate's trick for finding lost items was to speak to them in French, and ask them where they were.

So:
Où sont les lunettes de treepour? Nous avons besoin des lunettes de treepour!

Repeat that as you search.

(Also, are they near your keys and/or wallet?)

posted by occhiblu 21 May | 14:26

If you're tall, check the top of your fridge.

posted by lilywing13 21 May | 14:29

Did you vomit? An uncle of mine once got drunk at a bar, and then sick in the establishment's bathroom. He (stupidly) drove home, realized his false teeth were missing, drove back to the bar and found them floating in the toilet.

I never asked if he put them back in, but I suspect he did.

posted by tr33hggr 21 May | 14:34

I guarantee they'll be in the exact last place you look.

posted by ikkyu2 21 May | 14:48

Thanks so much for all of the advice, everyone! It's really keeping my spirits up as I continue the search.

Great story, tr33hggr. Fortunately, I didn't vomit and the toilet's not stopped up, so I'm pretty sure I didn't flush them.

I think is going to take a turn-the-apartment-upside-down kind of effort.

For awhile this morning, I thought maybe they'd fallen off in the cab and I hadn't noticed (though I don't think I was THAT drunk). But then I just remembered that I took the dog out for a walk before I went to bed, and that I was wearing them then (otherwise the street would have been all diffuse blobs of light -- and it wasn't). Phew. So they're here. They have to be. Somewhere. Here. In. The. Apartment.

I'm going to try the French thing now, thanks occhiblu.

posted by treepour 21 May | 14:49

Check by the dog leash?

posted by occhiblu 21 May | 14:50

You just need to find your glasses so you can find your glasses.

posted by loquacious 21 May | 14:51

Just clap your hands together and listen for the beep.

What, you don't have a homing device implanted in your glasses? FOOL!

Look
In the dog bowl
In the dog food bag
Under the rug that you always trip over
Next to the computer
Behind the toilet
In your jacket pocket
In the hamper
In the washing machine

Or just ask Neil Diamond. He knows everything.

posted by iconomy 21 May | 15:25

Do the St. Anthony prayer:

Dear St. Anthony
Please come 'round
Something's been lost
And can't be found.

posted by small_ruminant 21 May | 15:31

Also, did you leave them at the bar? Or in your jacket pocket?

posted by small_ruminant 21 May | 15:32

My bet is on (in, under) the bed.

posted by eamondaly 21 May | 15:59

They're probably either buried under whatever you were wearing that night. Either that, or someplace exceptionally impractical. Check the kitchen counter, the cupboard in which you keep cups, in couch cushions, or the refrigerator.

And, small_ruminant has just used my favourite phrase!

Say it two times fast:
jacket pocket
jacket pocket

posted by the great big mulp 21 May | 16:03

I forgot about St. Anthony!

While in Italy, I was told that if one has lost something, one is allowed to steal the baby Jesus from one's St. Anthony figurine and hold Jesus hostage until St. Anthony (the patron of lost items) returns the item. So there's that route, too, if the French isn't working for you.

posted by occhiblu 21 May | 16:25

haha! occhiblu, that's horrible! And I didn't even know that St. Anthonies came with Jesuses.

posted by small_ruminant 21 May | 16:42

I FOUND THEM I FOUND THEM I FOUND THEM HURRAY HURRAY HURRAY PEACE AND HAPPINESS AND JOY OVERFLOWING ITS GLORIOUS GLORIOUS DAY WOOHOO WOOT AND ALL OF THAT!!!

iconomy had it -- behind the toilet. I'd already checked there, but not at exactly the right angle. They'd fallen from a little shelf thing besides the toilet, and were suspended between the wall a pipe.

You all are the greatest! Big smooches to everyone (or polite waves if smooches aren't your thing)!

*runs out the door to see the world in glorious 3-d and sharp detail once again*

posted by treepour 21 May | 16:53

Hooray!! Vision! It's great!

posted by small_ruminant 21 May | 17:08

YAY!

I thought St. Anthony always had a baby Jesus, but maybe that's just an Italian convention? Italians like the babies.

posted by occhiblu 21 May | 17:35

Yay!

posted by iconomy 21 May | 18:05

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