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14 May 2007

We haven't had an office bathroom post in a while. [More:]
The bathroom closest to my desk used to be nice. Before they moved me downstairs, I used Grand Central Bathroom, where it wasn't unusual to have the proverbial "full house" situation. Now my bathroom is quiet. I'm usually able to have my "morning meeting" in peace, and get in a 10-15 minute game of Bejeweled on my phone.

But, as I said, that was before. A few weeks ago, maintenance taped a sheet of paper onto one of the urinals, indicating that it was out of order. That would have been fine, except that, over time, the odor coming from thing that crawled in there and died has gotten progressively worse, to the extent that now it is impossible to go into the bathroom and breathe normally. Most communal bathrooms have a smell, but this is something else entirely.

Did I mention that two of the four sinks have similar "out of order" signs? Because the standing black water in those sinks wouldn't have given it away.
Sick. Is there a building manager that you can talk to in order to get this resolved? Maybe they think that no one uses that bathroom and so are taking their time?
posted by LunaticFringe 14 May | 11:26
It's government, LF. All the fix-the-bathroom money is going to Iraq.
posted by mike9322 14 May | 11:28
I'm still ticked that women in the complex where we have our offices think it's OK to talk on their cell phones while using the facilities. IT'S NOT OK!!!!!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 May | 11:39
Less cynical response:

Contacting the facilities manager at this building results in the same canned response: "I know. It's being attended to."

See this.
posted by mike9322 14 May | 11:41
Whenever someone is on the phone in the bathroom, I make a point to flush as often as possible.
posted by mike9322 14 May | 11:42
I am so going to start doing that.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 May | 11:50
I find cell phone use in the bathroom disturbing. However, I did get the offer for my current job while on the can.

We have these automatic air fresheners in the bathroom that smell absolutely horrid. The current one smells sort of like strawberry candy, except it burns the inside of your nose. We had one a couple months ago that made the bathroom smell like somebody farted in a Yankee Candle Workshop store.
posted by backseatpilot 14 May | 11:52
I, too, find cell phone use in the John disturbing. I've told my friends that they are to never call me when they're doing "that", seriously, it can wait. Nothing I have to say to anybody would be that important that it couldn't wait the 3 minutes.
posted by LunaticFringe 14 May | 11:57
We had one a couple months ago that made the bathroom smell like somebody farted in a Yankee Candle Workshop store.

This is genius and I am going to steal it.
posted by mike9322 14 May | 11:58
Nothing I have to say to anybody would be that important that it couldn't wait the 3 minutes.

No kidding! At the airport in Houston, I overheard a long discussion in the next stall about...someone checking someone else's MySpace page?
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 May | 12:02
heh. Okay, not being argumentative (and I don't talk on my phone in the bathroom), but why is it so bothersome for someone else in the bathroom to talk on the phone? Is it because you are reading or ahem concentrating, or ... what? Do you feel the same way if two people in different stalls talk to each other? Because I have done a modest amount of this in my time.

Basically, for me, I just feel uncomfortable if anyone else is in there, period. Anyone making gutteral voice noises (like ooohm, aagh, aarmmm... you know, any of that kind of stuff) really gets me. Fart and plop sounds make me feel embarrassed, because I would be embarrassed if I made those sounds, so in some completely insane way, I'm feeling embarrassed for them. Conversations don't bug me... as long as they don't want to have a conversation with me, beyond "pass the paper".
posted by taz 14 May | 12:03
I've decided to get rich by marketing noise-canceling technology for removing the reverb from your signal when you use the cell phone in the bathroom.
posted by drezdn 14 May | 12:03
Why is it so bothersome for someone else in the bathroom to talk on the phone

Because the bathroom is not a place for cell phone calls- it is a place for going to the bathroom. Why does there need to be any reason beyond that? I realize this is the way the world is going- we have to defend why someone shouldn't use something somewhere, rather than them defending why they should- but I don't have to like it or stand for it. I don't want to listen to people blather on their cell phones in the bathroom. Just because you CAN do something somewhere doesn't mean you should. I see people text messaging at Broadway shows! Ugh, don't get me started on that.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 May | 12:17
we have to defend why someone shouldn't use something somewhere

I would comment that MeChat is not the place to discuss toilet activities, but somehow I doubt that would fly well. ;-P
posted by mischief 14 May | 12:53
Yeah, listen up guys. If you're going to use the stall for pissing, fine by me. That's all I use; I hate urinals. But either sit or use the fucking urinal, because nothing ruins my day faster than sitting down on the john after some fucknut pisses all over it.

Deal?
posted by tr33hggr 14 May | 12:59
Does that also mean that shitting in the urinal is out, tr33hggr?

Someone actually did this in my dorm freshman year, prompting signs from the RA that said "Pisser is for pissing! Shitter is for shitting!"
posted by mike9322 14 May | 13:01
The bathroom is a place for reading comic books instead of practicing violin or doing your homework.

"Hughie, do you think you're finished practicing? That was only fifteen minutes!"

"Leemealone, Ma! I'm making a stinky!"

Meanwhile, the combat-happy joes of Easy Company were fighting their way out of a Kraut doublecross as my bunghole got some recreational air.
posted by Hugh Janus 14 May | 13:10
Okay, TPS - I see that you are emphatic and feel like everyone should know it just shouldn't be done; I'm just saying it doesn't strike me the same way. I don't feel utterly creeped out if someone in another stall is talking to someone on their cellphone... especially as compared to other things that might totally skeeve me in the same situation.

I mean, I feel the same way about someone eating in the bathroom: it just shouldn't be done!!! Ever, ever, ever! Do you have to ask 'why?', you crazy person???? [NOT YOU]

But, I'm not so freaked by someone speaking (is it just the speaking? Or only speaking on the phone?).

Also, to reiterate, I'm not a bathroom phone type person, so I'm not reacting personally.
posted by taz 14 May | 13:18
I mean, I feel the same way about someone eating in the bathroom: it just shouldn't be done!!! Ever, ever, ever!

Please tell me there aren't people out there eating in the bathroom. Goodness, it's like when you see those warning labels on hairdryers "Do not use while in the shower", and you realize they only have to say it because people do it.

And it's really the phone part that gets me, not the speaking so much- if you walk in the bathroom, and Jane is there, of course you're gonna say hi, ask how the weekend is, whatever, because she's there. But you can talk on your phone anytime- why not just save it until you're off the toilet?
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 May | 13:26
I like to test the acoustics by singing Negro spirituals when I'm stalling. Is that okay?
Wade in the water
Wade in the water, children,
Wade in the water
God's a-going to trouble the water
posted by Hellbient 14 May | 13:26
I texting at the theatre. It's so much less rude than actually talking to them on the phone. And you only get half as many dirty looks.
posted by seanyboy 14 May | 13:27
But i'm still unclear about sex in the bathroom...yea or nay?
posted by Schyler523 14 May | 13:43
We have automated paper towel dispensers and the length of the paper that rolls out is too short for my comfort. So I went to the administrative assistant and asked if it could be lengthened by a couple of inches. She said that the facilities dept. was trying to economize and suggested that I take two lengths instead of one. I suggested that that solution was more wasteful than my suggestion, but she stubbornly insisted that it was the best solution. *sigh*

Also, the stall doors in the downstairs bathrooms open OUT, but the doors in the upstairs bathrooms open IN. I can never seem to remember this.
posted by initapplette 14 May | 13:46
Don't get me started on automated bathrooms.

Oh, wait, I already did.
posted by mike9322 14 May | 13:49
But i'm still unclear about sex in the bathroom...yea or nay?

Who needs a bathroom when you can get the keys to good ol' C.C. Baxter's apartment? Bud's a good sort of fellow; he won't let you down.
posted by Hugh Janus 14 May | 13:54
I love automated towel dispensers. I have perfected a strange little Bollywood type dance that I do to make the machine reward me with paper towels and it makes me feel like Parvati the goddess when I get the hand motions just right.
posted by mygothlaundry 14 May | 13:55
Okee, TPS... I guess I'm not getting it. I would find it odd, and fairly ooky, but not necessarily horribly repulsive, if somebody sat down in a public toilet and called someone. If someone in a stall answers their phone, it doesn't seem very creepy to me, unless they are doing very noisy potty stuff. I don't really see the difference between a friend in the next stall talking to you, and you answering your phone to a friend.

I mean, one doesn't demand that someone at home be fully dressed or even out of their kinky fetish suits before answering the phone or calling someone - as long as they don't make creepy noises and freak us the fuck out.
posted by taz 14 May | 13:56
Cellphones in the Bathroom, and Why They Bother Me
By mudpuppie
Mrs. Thompson's homeroom FORTH GRADE!!!


I feel that when other people talk on there cellpones in the bathroom it is they are being rude and invadeing invading my piratecy. Because if I am in the bathroom and I am doing THINGS I do not think it is right for you're friend to hear it because I do not know them and I would not broadcast you doing THINGS to my friends because it is rude. You can just go outside or if you can't hold it you should call them back later.

The end.
posted by mudpuppie 14 May | 14:28
My specific complaint is having to listen to other people on their cell phones in a public restroom. All I want is peace and privacy while I use the facilities. Something about hearing someone else blather on about something unimportant disturbs that peace. Listening to them talk to someone else in the room is also sort of weird, but more understandable. I don't care what people do at their homes while calling others, or even while calling me, as long as I don't have to know about it ("Hold on, I've gotta wipe").
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 14 May | 14:29
A+, mudpuppie.
posted by jrossi4r 14 May | 14:32
I have to share a bathroom with a storefront church and every Monday it's filthy. The trash was not emptied over the weekend, and I suspect there's a diaper in there. It smells like campground toilet. I've left a burning stick of incense on the sink. I'll probably go use the restaurant's facilities later...
posted by krix 14 May | 14:32
All I want is peace and privacy while I use the facilities.

I'm pretty much dash-in and right out, as much as possible; I don't really spend enough time in the bathroom for that sort of thing to get to me, I guess.

Privacy is the best - nay, the ultimate dream that we all wish for in a public loo - the holy grail! ... but, forsaking that, "peace" is never something that I expect to find there.
posted by taz 14 May | 14:46
sorry; I meant "even forsaking that"
posted by taz 14 May | 14:51
I get better reception in the bathroom.
posted by mullacc 14 May | 15:06
the bathroom is for sending TEXT MESSAGES, not talking.

:)
posted by By the Grace of God 14 May | 15:51
I'm still ticked that women in the complex where we have our offices think it's OK to talk on their cell phones while using the facilities.

Damn. Women do this too?

Unbelievable.
posted by jason's_planet 14 May | 16:18
I was gonna say what mudpuppie said, but not as funny.

I'm annoyed by hearing people talking in the bathroom stalls, period, even if the person they're talking to is in the next stall.

But I'm severely weirded out by hearing someone on a cell phone and not knowing how much background noise is being transmitted, and therefore whether people not present are listening to me pee or blow my nose or flush the toilet. Even if they can't actually hear anything, someone being on a cellphone causes me to worry about how private my bathroom activities really are, and is therefore an invasion of my privacy.
posted by occhiblu 14 May | 17:00
What about calling phone sex numbers while on the shitter?

"I am sitting down with my pants on my ankles..."
posted by qvantamon 14 May | 18:12
If somebody in the next stall is talking on the cell phone, I try to fart as hard as I possibly can to get that wonderful resonance that flatus can get off of hard porcelain and tile surfaces, then add, a touch too loudly: " 'Scuse me."
posted by PaxDigita 14 May | 18:38
I've never once heard someone on the phone in the toilet. You guys work at strange places.
posted by octothorpe 14 May | 19:04
If cell phones aren't enough, they go ahead and use the stall while talking on a hidden bluetooth receiver. Do you have any idea how confusing it is to have the guy two stalls down from you just start talking and laughing to himself?
posted by spiderskull 14 May | 21:31
I'm talking about urinals here, actually. I don't know why I said "stalls."
posted by spiderskull 14 May | 21:32
I HAVE heard people on their phones while peeing and shitting and find it disgusting--but my godparents had an extension next to their toilet in the 70's, and in How to Save Your Own Life Erica Jong describes one in "Britt's" (Julia Roberts) suite bathroom in the Beverly Hills Hotel.
posted by brujita 14 May | 23:39
if you walk in the bathroom, and Jane is there, of course you're gonna say hi, ask how the weekend is, whatever, because she's there.
Nope, no way - don't even make eye contact with me in that room, let alone talk to me, because you will get the minimum response to indicate that I'm not being rude, but I won't interact any further than that. I know it's weird, but I don't even want to acknowledge another person at that time. It's totally me time.
posted by dg 15 May | 18:34
Babe the Blue Ox @ Magnetic Field on Friday || THIS IS THE EPONYSTERICAL THREAD.

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