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01 May 2007

Political notes from all over. (Batshitinsane, UT edition) [More:]

Funny they were discussing Satan's minions, but they themselves lacked a minyan.
Perhaps my favorite quote:

In a speech, Enid Greene, state Republican Party chair, announced to applause that she will remarry in a few months.

Is that a promise or a threat, Enid?
posted by rob511 01 May | 19:51
Utah County Republicans ended their convention on Saturday by debating Satan's influence on illegal immigrants.

Does Satan have a green card?

Name: Prince O'Darkness
Country of Origin: Pits Of Hades..
posted by jonmc 01 May | 19:55
That whole article reads like something out of The Onion.

Greene said she was disappointed in BYU professors who protested Dick Cheney's visit to campus, calling them "self-appointed intellectuals."

Say it isn't so! Intellectuals teaching at a university? It's a travesty.
posted by BoringPostcards 01 May | 19:58
Does that make Guinness devil's food, jon? Count me in.
posted by rob511 01 May | 20:06
Illegal aliens are in control of the media, and working in tandem with Democrats, are trying to "destroy Christian America" and replace it with "a godless new world order -- and that is not extremism, that is fact," Larsen said.

At the end of his speech, Larsen began to cry, saying illegal immigrants were trying to bring about the destruction of the U.S. "by self invasion."

Somebody's been mixing their meds...

posted by bmarkey 01 May | 20:07
Illegal aliens are in control of the media

Only Telemundo, but they're gaining. I blame Lola Hotchacha. Bent on world domination, that one.
posted by jonmc 01 May | 20:11
One speaker, who was identified as "Joe," said illegal immigrants were Marxist and under the influence of the devil.

Marxist? Really? Really??

Wow, I didn't know that was a concern these days.

Are they also worried about the Kaiser?

I know Marxists. They wear a lot of sweaters and smoke cheap cigarettes.
posted by kellydamnit 01 May | 20:21
I thought they smoked the expensive French ones.
posted by jonmc 01 May | 20:28
"If [illegal immigrants] want to be Americans, they should learn to speak English and fly their flag like we do."

I just know that's code for something, I can't figure out what....
posted by rob511 01 May | 20:28
Well, hell, I saw "UT" and assumed I'd see a link to the Daily Texan, which used to routinely scoop the Austin American-Statesman back in the day with stories of fun 'n' games in "the Lege."
posted by PaxDigita 01 May | 20:32
I thought they smoked the expensive French ones.

Shoot, I'm impressed when they don't have a can of Top and some papers!
posted by kellydamnit 01 May | 20:38
Are they also worried about the Kaiser?

Do not underestimate the rapacious Hun, young lady!
posted by scody 01 May | 21:07
The Kaiser is an illegal immigrant himself, putting American sandwich bread out of work...
posted by jonmc 01 May | 21:14 cahoots with French's mustard!
posted by scody 01 May | 21:23
you forgot Polish ham.
posted by jonmc 01 May | 21:26
And Russian dressing!
posted by scody 01 May | 21:29
German chocolate cake, the worst offender of all, displacing our glorious apple pie from its rightful place of honor on every dessert plate.
posted by casarkos 01 May | 21:34
Today, the deli case. Tomorrow, the world!
posted by bmarkey 01 May | 21:34
Arise, ye prisoners of starvation! You have nothing to lose but your cravings for delicious triple-decker sandwiches!
posted by scody 01 May | 21:47
Not to rain on the parade, because I like to mock the crazy Utahns as much as the next person, but Ken Jennings of Jeopardy! fame had some interesting things to say about Mormon-mocking.

I especially love his comment about magic beanies.
posted by brina 01 May | 23:45
The only mention of LDS was in the context of the one voice of sanity.

Joel Wright, a member of the Cedar Hills City Council, was booed as he opposed the resolution.

"This might be the most divisive issue in the Republican Party," he said. "I support President Bush but he needs to support this issue harder."

When Wright said "the economic benefit (of illegal immigration) outweighs the downside" he was jeered. He warned that the Republican Party of California had "killed themselves" by taking a hostile stance against illegal aliens.

He also said the LDS Church has studied the issue and tried to determine whether illegal aliens could be given temple recommends and allowed to serve missions but "gave up" because the issue was too complex. He ended by saying "President Bush needs to fix this now" and was booed again.

Speaking personally, I have no problem with Mormons; the few I've known socially have been cool, and my boss' boss seems like a pretty upright guy. I could do without the missionaries knocking on my door, but that's true for the Jehovah's Witnesses, too.

It's the xenophobic bigots who believe that illegal immigrants control the media and are, in fact, in league with Satan and/or Marxists to destroy America from within that bug me. Anyone that divorced from reality deserves to be roundly mocked at every opportunity.
posted by bmarkey 02 May | 00:16
Well, of course. Just that it's sort of ... hmm ... easy for one to imply that the xenophobic bigots are Mormon xenophobic bigots who believe that illegal immigrants are in league with Satan because that's what Mormons believe.

But maybe it's just what Republicans believe. Crazy Republicans.
posted by brina 02 May | 00:33
Maybe I'm just being thick, but I'm not seeing where anyone implied that being Mormon had anything to do with it.
posted by bmarkey 02 May | 00:41
Rob, thanks for the article. Husband and I read it out loud twice yesterday and laughed our heads off. You can mention Satan. You can mention minions, but you've gone too far when you mention Satan's minions

But maybe it's just what Republicans believe. Crazy Republicans
Exactly. A lot of Republicans are crazy, but Larsen and his supporters are on the absolute fringe of crazy. I'm imagining the sane people left. That's why they couldn't get a quorum. Or maybe I'm naive.

Speaking of Mormons. I work for a hospital that is owned by the LDS church. My boss was on a local radio program to promote the American Heart Association's "Go Red" program and the host asked her, "Do you work for that cult hospital?" on-air. Lovely.
posted by LoriFLA 02 May | 07:18
We should nuke Utah from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
posted by deborah 04 May | 12:36
I was a Windows Live Hotmail beta tester. || Beltane is for pansies...