MetaChat - A tribute to the 40.

Back in high school, this was me and my friends' brand.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 11:36

It's best in a paper bag, passed amongst friends, leaning against a car in a parking lot, with the 8-track goin'. Ah, sweet washback.

posted by Pips 19 April | 11:43

and some appropriate listening to accompany

posted by jonmc 19 April | 11:44

Hahaha, Young Black Teenagers. Remind me to post some of DJ Drank's Greatest Malt Liquor Hits later. I love that stuff.

posted by box 19 April | 11:50

Malt liquor? I used to wish that Miller Genuine Draft came in 2-liter bottles.

posted by PaxDigita 19 April | 11:52

YBT, man. A silly group, but that song is a great drinking anthem.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 11:52

MGD? whatta you some kinda lightweight?

posted by jonmc 19 April | 11:53

I can finish my Mickey before you can finish yours.

posted by rainbaby 19 April | 11:54

(also, in honor of this thread, I've just cracked a 40 of this wonderful swill. If anybody's got a blunt, let's go out to the parking lot and crank some tunes.)

posted by jonmc 19 April | 11:55

OE 800? Man, that's my brand--drink it in a bottle, forty, quart or can.

posted by box 19 April | 11:57

I remember waiting in line to see the Ramones at the Ritz back in '91, me and my friend Mooch killed two 40's waiting to get in, then bought two more on the way home and spent the night drinking shot galsses of beer every three minutes. There was some kind of logic to that but I don't remember what it was.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 11:59

One night while on a beer replenishment run a friend and I decided to buy a bunch of random bottles of 40's and have a blind taste test. We learned two things that night. 1) None of us were particularly fond of Malt Liquor. 2) The more ferocious the animal the beer was named after, the worst the beer tasted.

If I HAVE to drink it's a going to be a Mickey's Big Mouth - the beer's not much better than any other malt liquor, but the bottle is like a little hand gernade and throws better than anything else. Although, it's been 15 years since I've actually thown a beer bottle, so maybe there are some new contenders out there.

posted by Slack-a-gogo 19 April | 12:17

On the second date with the future MrsMoonPie, I took her to an excellent hole-in-the-wall Chinese restaurant in a seedy neighborhood. The place didn't have a liquor licence, but they allowed brown bagging, so we first stopped off at a corner store for a 40 (though it wasn't, alas, malt liquor). She wasn't too sure about the whole thing, but she was game, and that really impressed me.

posted by mrmoonpie 19 April | 12:22

Slack: malt liquors not about the taste, it's about cheap intoxication, which is why it's so popular with young folks.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 12:22

jonmc, you were in my dream last night. You were getting into acting, I had a headshot for you, but I couldn't figure out how many dang vowels were in your last name to put your name on it. You were no help. I hope you didn't get any work. *toasts*

posted by rainbaby 19 April | 12:38

rainbaby, that's freaky. Back in the Dumbco days, I was riding the elevator a maintenance guy told me (unsolicited) that I should get into acting, that I 'looked like an actor' whatever the hell that means. And there's only one actual vowel and one sometimes vowel in my last name.

*passes 40*

posted by jonmc 19 April | 12:45

CrazyHorse used to be my brand. For some reason.
I can't drink that shit anymore, the last third is always too disgusting and lukewarm.
I can't remember the last time I had a Mickey's, or Black Label for that matter.

Yeah jon, you'd be a good actor. Take a UCB class! Doowit! It's "fake" acting, and probably more fun, and you'd be good at it.

posted by Hellbient 19 April | 12:50

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Otis 19 April | 12:50

Yeah jon, you'd be a good actor.

except for the fact that I get nervous doing public speaking, sure. and if the last third is lukewarm, you're obviously not drinking fast enough. although the OE is starting to take effect, I just danced around the apartment in my undies to 'The Bitch Is Back.'

(also, has it occured to anybody that the 'strong ales' like La Fin Du Monde, Duvel etc. are basically better tasting, more expensive malt liquor?)

Otis: Billy Dee, baby. King of smoooth...

posted by jonmc 19 April | 12:54

Some thoughts on the 40.
Listen:

The 40 is actually a terrible way to deliver beer. It always gets warm unless you sword swallower chug it down. I recommend, without reservation, the humble, but rarer quart. It's only 8 oz less, but that's the warm, spitty 8.

I hate malt liquor. I still drink 40's of bud, mgd and hi-life all the time. When I'm feeling particularly gnarly I take a poke at a 40 of Ballantine ale. Hurrrgghhh.

I love the 40 because it feels like an expedition weight drink. Like if you were going to walk home alone, late at night and it was cold and rainy and someone asked you if you were going to be all right, you could say "Yeah, I got a 40."

I wish you could still walk around New York and drink 40's.

A popular thing to do in my younger days was to drink some OE down to the label and then pour in a bottle of Guinness to make an "8-ball" or "Kunta", still pretty gross but it had elements of chemistry.

If I had to chose I would take Colt .45 as cold as possible, but I loathe malt liquor.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 12:56

No need to drink that fast jon, no need, slow and steady wins the race.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 12:57

When I'm feeling particularly gnarly I take a poke at a 40 of Ballantine ale.

Plus the rebuses provide intellectual stimulation. What a lot of you are forgetting is that 40's were usually passed around a group of 3 or more along with a joint and possibly some DeKuyper schanpps in a park or a parking lot or the back of someone's Nova, and under those circumstances it is a fine liquid refreshment.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 13:00

Mr Bostons Blackberry Brandy.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 13:01

yeah, start early, take it slow, and finish late. More fun. Less crashing.

I'll tell you, I have that same fear jon, everyone does to an extent I suppose, but a big part of it is facing that fear. It's actually a nice rush. I know you're not shy, not as shy as me at least. And your funnier and more quick-witted. And the thing you realize is, everyone here is in the same damn boat. You can be a complete ass and it gets rewarded. Win win!

posted by Hellbient 19 April | 13:06

Ah, right.

You were using Macanudo (sp) as your stage name, though.

22 - 24 oz. delivery system is good.

posted by rainbaby 19 April | 13:07

Mr. Bostons has bad associations for me. During my year working nights in abakery after flunking out of college, I used to spend a lot of time hanging out with this ex-biker/hippie neighbor, Ted. Me, him and his wife would sit around and listen to tunes and drink beer and get high. One night me and Ted went to the liquor store and instead of beer I decided to get a pint of Apricot brandy. I guzzled the whole pint in about an hour. I wobbled on home later and I guess they were worried about me and they called my folks. Ted's wife tried to sugar-coat it, saying 'He seems stressed. Didn't you ever have a night where you just wanted to get drunk?' and apparently my dad answered 'every damn night, but I don't do it.' and my parents went up to my room worried about me and woke me and as I groggily looked around I noticed the corona of puke surrounding my head. Kinda put me off Mr. Boston.

You were using Macanudo (sp) as your stage name, though.

Ha! When I lived in Miami, my Cubano co-workers dubbed me (along with 'el gringo flaco loco') 'Johnny Macanudo.' I miss some of those guys, this one kid Pedro and I were pretty close. Him and this other kid Falco, joined the Marines in a fit of patritotism after 9/11. I've done the occasional googling and they have indeed served in country. Hope they're still OK.

I'll tell you, I have that same fear jon, everyone does to an extent I suppose, but a big part of it is facing that fear. It's actually a nice rush. I know you're not shy, not as shy as me at least. And your funnier and more quick-witted.

hellbient: you've never struck me as shy and you're one of the funniest people I know.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 13:12

well, I am kinda shy. And thanks. You should consider it, really. It's fun. It seems incredibly dorky, and I guess it kinda is, but I'll invite you to a show sometime and maybe see for yourself.

posted by Hellbient 19 April | 13:39

Woo! 40's! Only had one in my life!

But a few friends and I had a party last weekend, and you know what I saw for the first time?
"Edward 40-hands" or "Forty-Fists."

≡ Click to see image ≡

Anyone else familiar with this? You apparently ducttape two 40's to your hands/fists, thus rendering you unable to do jackshit unless you drink them both. I politely declined, for mental reasons (I wasn't dumb enough to think it was a good idea :P ). Divine_Wino summed up my thoughts on the 40. Too warm too fast is my main beef. Too clunky as well.

I did pose with a 40, however. I don't have the picture handy (a friend took it with his camera), but here is me, sans 40, looking straight up gangsta, if only to humble myself after making fun of my 40-handed friends.
≡ Click to see image ≡

I prefer a combination of beer and liquor, rather than a large bottle to contend with. Bass or Smithwicks with a small bottle of Jack Daniels is my favorite combo. Allows one to maintain a solid buzz for extended periods of time. Moderation and alternation are key, as is a backpack if you're on the go.

posted by CitrusFreak12 19 April | 13:41

Allows one to maintain a solid buzz for extended periods of time. Moderation and alternation are key, as is a backpack if you're on the go.

Those are the things you learn with experience and age. The whippersnappers go for speed and quantity and sail right past good buzz into falling down drunk.

I went the other way from the 40. We'd get cases of the Lucky Lager [10oz bottles with fun pictogram puzzles under the cap to see how drunk you are]. When you live in Arizona you want to keep the beer cold as long as possible so you want smaller delivery mechanisms kept on ice.

posted by birdherder 19 April | 15:17

The whippersnappers go for speed and quantity and sail right past good buzz into falling down drunk.

That's the problem with kids today. The drink of choice, in my dorm at least, is a big handle of Burnett's Flavored Vodka, the vilest form of alcohol I have ever had the unfortunate experience of drinking once. I don't drink this crap, and as a result many of my friends think I don't drink at all. "It'll get you drunk!" they all say. Yeah, and so will a nice cold beer or some Johnny Walker, but I drink those because I enjoy them. If you refuse to drink without "a chaser, to get the taste out of your mouth" or "to make it less unpleasant," you've completely missed the point of drinking in the first place. Kind of like how they buy $2 cigars that taste awful. You smoke cigars to enjoy them, not just to look cool.

And stay off my lawn!

posted by CitrusFreak12 19 April | 15:26

(also, has it occured to anybody that the 'strong ales' like La Fin Du Monde, Duvel etc. are basically better tasting, more expensive malt liquor?)

Yeah, but it's hard to find a strong ale in anything much bigger than a deuce-deuce. Pity, too, because slightly-warm Chimay tastes a whole lot better than slightly-warm malt liquor. (Oh, and also, 'better tasting' is, of beer's four qualitative properties (taste, price, alcohol content and availability), the only one that matters. A Lexus is a more comfortable, better-engineered Yugo, and KISS is a poppier Slipknot with better brand extension.)

I love the 40 because it feels like an expedition weight drink. Like if you were going to walk home alone, late at night and it was cold and rainy and someone asked you if you were going to be all right, you could say "Yeah, I got a 40."

The forty means business.

posted by box 19 April | 15:44

'Qualitative'? That might not've been the word I was looking for. Ah, well, pretend I'm drunk.

posted by box 19 April | 15:51

Yeah, but it's hard to find a strong ale in anything much bigger than a deuce-deuce.

and that double-duece will cost you ten bucks. whereas the 40 of OE is $3. And while it dosen't taste good, it's not much worse than Budweiser and will get you just as loaded. Worse, better?

(and do not mention Slipknot in the same breath as Kiss, please.)

posted by jonmc 19 April | 16:40

Worse, better, better for a specific purpose, who knows? I don't like the taste of let's-call-'em-macrobrews, and I'm more a tippler, or a fan of the ritual or something, than a drink-to-get-drunk type. Other folks have different priorities, and different opinions. Isn't that always the way?

(and do not mention Slipknot in the same breath as Kiss, please.)

Yeah, see, that's how I am about Budweiser and, y'know, Belgian strong ales or American craft-brewed imperial stouts or whatever.

posted by box 19 April | 17:11

well, in general I'd agree with you, box, but arguments about the tastes of alcoholic beverages...it's kind of like arguments about the qualitative differences in pornography, you know what I mean? There's good and bad sure, but the ultimate goal is still to look at boobies and get off...and the with beer, the ultimate goal...well, if there wasn't a buzz involved, would we even bother?

posted by jonmc 19 April | 17:17

I know you feel this way (or, since I also know that you sometimes like the top-shelf stuff, let's say I know you like making the argument), but I really must disagree. Otherwise, I'd be shooting up Everclear, and I don't think I'd enjoy that nearly as much as I enjoy swirling some Aventinus around in a glass, making the volatile scent-producing compounds rise to the surface, taking a deep sniff, redolent with earthy aromas and heady from the vapors, savoring the complex and multifaceted... I'm probably starting to sound like a drunk.

posted by box 19 April | 17:35

Well, that's kind of my point, box. If I had a ton of money at my disponsal, I'd drink Macallan 18-year-old with La Fin Do Monde chasers and the like, but I don't, so I drink Bud and OE and cheap whiskey, but in the end the result is still the same except for the bill.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 17:44

I know you like making the argument

again, it's not so much making the argument as being rigorously honest. Whether you're drunk on single malt scotch or Mad Dog 20/20 (and I've drank my share of both) you're still drunk.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 17:48

While box is perfectly capable of speaking for himself, I think what he's getting at is that not everybody drinks to get drunk. There are a lot of sensual pleasures to the various types of booze beyond just getting hammered.

posted by bmarkey 19 April | 18:21

Whether you're drunk on single malt scotch or Mad Dog 20/20

Also, nah, not all, totally different. One sucks and one is pretty good.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 18:25

It's a different drunk. And some of that, to be sure, is due to the power of suggestion, but it's also because MD's packed with refined sugar and artificial flavorings and whatnot, which makes the body feel one way, while single-malts are packed with other stuff, which makes the body feel the other way.

posted by box 19 April | 18:34

There are a lot of sensual pleasures to the various types of booze beyond just getting hammered.

Eh..if the worlds best whiskey, didn't provide at least a little buzz (and I don't deny that good whiskey tastes better than cheap shit) would you even bother?

and D_W, you are my brother by another mother, but I've seen you sock down enough cheap suds to not buy that. Yes, I realiz that the taste is different, but the effect is still the same.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 18:39

Eh..if the worlds best whiskey, didn't provide at least a little buzz (and I don't deny that good whiskey tastes better than cheap shit) would you even bother?

Actually, yeah, I would. While I won't deny enjoying a nice buzz, I also like the aroma of what I'm drinking, the body of it on my tongue, and the various flavors on my palate.

I have, in my time, drunk to get drunk. (And how.) I will probably do so again, at some point. I just happen to enjoy the other aspects of a glass as well.

posted by bmarkey 19 April | 18:51

I also like the aroma of what I'm drinking, the body of it on my tongue, and the various flavors on my palate.

as do I, but whether it's a galss of ale brewed by 3-eyed Belgian monks in a glacial cave or a 40 of Mickey's, after awhile the effect is still going to be the same. I'm just trying to be honest here. YMMV.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 18:56

Yeah, I get that, jon. Maybe I'm misinterpreting you, but you're coming across as if getting drunk were the only reason to drink, ever. If that's the case, then I've gotta respectfully disagree.

posted by bmarkey 19 April | 19:06

Maybe I'm misinterpreting you, but you're coming across as if getting drunk were the only reason to drink, ever.

Naw, but even if you're just having one or two and appreciating the taste and all that shit, you're still going to feel the effects same as if you just chugged a few cold ones and to deny that is silly, too.

posted by jonmc 19 April | 19:15

To be sure.

posted by bmarkey 19 April | 19:19

Jon
I like to drink cheap and I like to drink fancy, frankly, to my occasional detriment, I like to drink. The is a difference between one and the other, hell, I've drank single malt to get drunk, it's a hell of a thing to do...

Sometimes you lay down the law baby boy, but we don't all always follow the same laws.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 20:10

Hey, reaching back to the depths of the Ninties, does anyone remember Heather B from the first MTV real world, the rapper? She was BDP crew, had a single called "All Glocks Down?"

She had a line in a song

"And I wish they sold Snapple by the forty."

She seemed like she really meant it.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 20:13

That reminds me:

Wu-Tang Clan - Shaolin Brew

Why somebody thought this would sell malt liquor, I'll never know.

posted by box 19 April | 20:20

It's one of the craziest ads ever, ever.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 20:28

Sometimes you lay down the law baby boy, but we don't all always follow the same laws.

Don't call me baby boy, baby brother. I'm 5 years older than you, don't forget. My ultimate point was still that no matter what you get drunk on, you're still getting drunk.

(and I remember Heather B. I actually have the H.E.A.L. Project CD with her track on it)

(also, I'm on my 3rd 40, so forgive any incoherency)

posted by jonmc 19 April | 20:39

It's a wonderful and salient point to be sure baby boy. Mwah.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 20:48

Junior, you are the one man on earth I would tolerate that from.

*passes dregs of final 40*

posted by jonmc 19 April | 20:58

I'm glad jon, baby boy is a term of endearment, not a mark of hierarchy. I'm going to see if I can't handle a dram or two of Maker's Mark tonight, after my week with the flu. Wish me luck and if you can't wish me luck send cigarette money and the name of a good bondsman.

posted by Divine_Wino 19 April | 21:03

hat's the problem with kids today. The drink of choice, in my dorm at least, is a big handle of Burnett's Flavored Vodka, the vilest form of alcohol I have ever had the unfortunate experience of drinking once. I don't drink this crap, and as a result many of my friends think I don't drink at all. "It'll get you drunk!" they all say. Yeah, and so will a nice cold beer or some Johnny Walker, but I drink those because I enjoy them. If you refuse to drink without "a chaser, to get the taste out of your mouth" or "to make it less unpleasant," you've completely missed the point of drinking in the first place.

You're not being very fair to the Young People of Today. Kids always drink shit booze. Always have. Always will. This is because:

It is cheap and kids tend to be (cash) poor.

They are young and do not know any better. Their tastes have not matured yet.

The drinking part of your life will improve after you leave the dorms. I can't promise the same about any other aspect of your life. But the drinking -- yes. That will improve.

posted by jason's_planet 19 April | 21:12

Glad you're feelin' better, DW. You were surely missed yesterday. Salute!

posted by Pips 19 April | 21:16

Buy a house on a corner lot and find enough of these smashed against your side fence and you won't refer to this as a "superlative intoxicant container" ever again. I think glass versions of the 40 should be banned, prohibited and otherwise outlawed.

posted by Doohickie 19 April | 21:31

Just for you, d-dub (not the Snapple song, though)

Heather B - Mad Bent

posted by box 19 April | 21:56

40 oz for Breakfast

posted by Otis 20 April | 21:17

I'm kind of bemused to find that Crazy Horse is some kind of historical relic these days. The number of 40's of the Horse I put away back in the day would fill a small truck.

posted by ikkyu2 21 April | 01:31

19 April 2007