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25 February 2007

Hey, you know what's funny? Making fun of the millions of people whose excitement and devotion to you fund your art, your trade, and your Armani.[More:]I really didn't mean to watch one second of the Oscars, but while waiting for our brownies to cook, we turned them on for a moment. Clearly a mistake.
Well, there's one way to stop them: stop watching. (seriously, dude, the Oscars, like all awards shows is where the rich and beautiful get together to lick eachothers butts and the rest of us sit on the couch and watch. I, for one, say no, at least until they start making good flicks again)
posted by jonmc 25 February | 22:31
Yeah, I need to get paid to watch the Oscars.

Jon, did you ever catch the connection between oscar and osculum, the Latin for "kiss"; as in my big black ass? Tonguing each others asses indeed. Oscar = ass-kiss-fest. Don't need it, wish the people whose hard-earned money these folks take would stop talking about it. Turn the TV off and fingerpaint with your kids or something. Or don't; it ain't my call.
posted by Eideteker 25 February | 22:44
awards shows are meaningless, stupid and unbearable to watch.
posted by weretable and the undead chairs 25 February | 22:47
I repeat my oft-metioned prediction that there eventually will be an Award Show Awards. Broadcast on the USA Network. And Joan Rivers and her mutant fucking daughter will be outside at the red carpet. or linoleum, as the case may be.
posted by jonmc 25 February | 22:51
Some of you are WATCHING the Oscars? Me, I'm just checking in on David Spade's Showbiz Show's live blogging of the event twice an hour. Not only do I get a whole week's minimum requirement of Snark, but they finally reveal which jokes are actually written by Spade (entries by writing staff beating entries by DS 7-to-1 ratio, actually funnies running 4-Zip for the writers - but that's out of about 80 entries so far). Also, Spade and his writers double-posted a "Jennifer Hudson's Jiffy Pop vest" reference - the writers did it first.
posted by wendell 25 February | 23:05
David Spade was beaten too much as a child. or not enough. I can never decide.
posted by jonmc 25 February | 23:07
This made me laugh:
"An Inconvenient Truth" Wins
Posted By: theshowbizshow
Okay, Al, let's make some smart choices after this. Don't pull a "Catwoman."
posted by wendell 25 February | 23:08
Wait so what happened? Who made fun of who for what? How?

Huh?
posted by CitrusFreak12 25 February | 23:15
hm, I don't know about that blog. Seems like you'd need to be watching the oscars to know what the fuck these people are talking about, which I do not.
posted by court siem 25 February | 23:19
Just discovered that MSNBC.com is doing an Oscars Live Snark Blog too... Dave White, who I fear is funnier than I, is doing it... recapping highlights...

It starts with a clip show of nominees being “natural” and “off the cuff” and, of course, the tech people are the coolest ones. The stars aren’t used to being human beings anymore.

Philip Glass says nothing: he’s minimalist!

Ellen looks cool. I like that velvet tux. She looks like a magician.

I want her to start pulling out rabbits, pouring milk into her fist, sawing Portia in half. That would be fun.

Al Gore and Leo!

Leo wants to know if Al has something to announce.

Al says, “Yes, I want to announce that my face is huge.” Okay, just kidding. He announces that he is grateful to Hollywood. Jerry Seinfeld is making a freaky face in the audience.

Well played, camera operators. Now Leo is talking about how the show is now “green” and everyone is applauding how incredible they all are for minimizing this year’s show’s methane emissions.

Honestly, he's funnier than I would've been.
posted by wendell 25 February | 23:27
Who made fun of the millions of people?
posted by taz 25 February | 23:32
Commenters on the Showbiz Show blog are now getting funnier than the writers... (for a while they were just more obnoxious). After "Inconvenient Truth" won:
flangum said:
Interesting fact: The director's breasts? Fluorocarbon.

chorl said:
Supreme Court just ruled that Jesus Camp really won the award.
posted by wendell 25 February | 23:33
everyone is applauding how incredible they all are for minimizing this year’s show’s methane emissions.

What, all the movie stars have stopped farting? they're just going to explode at age 50 or something?
posted by jonmc 25 February | 23:34
During the 45 seconds we watched, Ellen was doing some bit where she was pretending to be an annoying fan of Clint Eastwood's. It really really rubbed me the wrong way.
posted by eamondaly 25 February | 23:37
Does this picture sum up the state of Oscar Fashion this year? Is that George Takai in a dress behind Meryl Streep? (It should be) Mr. Blackwell is so lazy, he bases most of his '10 Worst Dressed List' on pics from the Oscars red carpet. This will make his year!
posted by wendell 25 February | 23:44
Oscar? Oscar who?
posted by Doohickie 26 February | 00:36
I was snarking with the folks at Defamer. It's one of the few nation-wide events where we can all snark in unison.

posted by psho 26 February | 00:47
I watched "The Fearless Vampire Killers" on DVD. Polanski rules.
posted by mischief 26 February | 00:48
Is this something I would need to know about the Oscars to know about?
posted by agropyron 26 February | 00:56
During the 45 seconds we watched, Ellen was doing some bit where she was pretending to be an annoying fan of Clint Eastwood's. It really really rubbed me the wrong way.

I don't think she was making fun of people in a mean way. I think that sort of "humor" is her M.O. (look at me, I'm Ellen, I'm so silly, weeeeee). All I can say is, if she posts the picture on her MySpace, it's all good by me :-)
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 26 February | 01:33
I'm with TPS. If you've seen Ellen's standup act, or her talk show, she's all about the self-deprecating "everywoman", and she's done the starstruck fan thing before. Sort of a "Me? a celebrity?! Stop. Stop. I mean it. Stop. No, you don't say?" angle.
posted by stilicho 26 February | 02:49
It's too bad she's not really funny.
posted by court siem 26 February | 03:01
It's too bad she's not really funny.

::shrug::
I think she is.
posted by CitrusFreak12 26 February | 08:51
Ellen's hilarious.
posted by deborah 26 February | 09:18
I'm with court siem- I've never found her ultra funny. Great talk show host, though.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 26 February | 10:07
Ellen on her own is somewhat tedious; Ellen with a good writer puts her in my Top 10 Greatest Living Comedians.
posted by mischief 26 February | 10:43
Ellen can be funny. She is a good interviewer, and she's cute as hell.

Besides, she's got Portia de Rossi. God knows *I've* always wanted her.

I say, good for her!
posted by mmahaffie 26 February | 11:29
I watched some episodes of Ultraman and then read some more of The 13 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear because I find the Oscars too childish.
posted by Lentrohamsanin 26 February | 14:07
Ultraman.... yeah....

That takes me back to my first experience with non-network TV, before cable existed. Channel 29 was started up in Buffalo as an independent station with no affiliation. They aired a lot of syndicated reruns and..... Ultraman. I was all WTF? But I watched it, even though it made no sense.

Ultra.

Man.
posted by Doohickie 26 February | 15:40
Yeah, I need to get paid to watch the Oscars.

Heh. The bf and I tied (as a team) for first in the Oscar pool at the party we went to, so we actually did get paid to watch. (And we would have won the whole damn shebang if he'd just listened to me when I said that the Forest Whittaker juggernaut was going to overtake Peter O'Toole's sentimental favorite status. *sighs*)
posted by scody 26 February | 16:34
Okay - I wanna be the first person to say this.... || I had my first 500 point Scrabble game this weekend!

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