MetaChat REGISTER   ||   LOGIN   ||   IMAGES ARE OFF   ||   RECENT COMMENTS




artphoto by splunge
artphoto by TheophileEscargot
artphoto by Kronos_to_Earth
artphoto by ethylene

Home

About

Search

Archives

Mecha Wiki

Metachat Eye

Emcee

IRC Channels

IRC FAQ


 RSS


Comment Feed:

RSS

05 February 2007

Have you ever done something sketchy at work? Dreadfully boring story inside. [More:]I recently went back to work. Once a week to get out of the house. I was at work at the hospital last week -- on Wednesday -- for the first time in a long time. We were incredibly busy and I forgot to note when I wanted to work in the upcoming weeks. I work flex-pool, so I can work when I want. I told my supervisor a while ago that I wanted to work Mondays. I only worked last Wednesday because I am still getting acquainted with the floor and the computer system.

Boring backstory: I used to work full-time before I had children, then very part-time, and then not at all for nearly four years. I decided to go back to get my foot back in the door. I also thought it might be good for my mental health.

Over the weekend I told myself I would just show up on Monday, even if I didn't note it earlier, since my supervisor was probably expecting me. I've been feeling generally depressed and regretful that I returned to work in the first place. My job generally sucks, it's a 13-hour day, and I have mom-guilt that I am away from the kids this long, even though my husband is with them. Have I mentioned that I'm crazy?

I was having a internal pity party in bed last night. This morning when the alarm went off, I said, "Screw it. I'm not going. I will work some other day, or figure it out later."

When the brain fogginess cleared the guilt settled in. I showered and put on nice clothes. I drove to the hospital to mark when I wanted to work, and to get a feel for the situation. My supervisor saw me, said hello, but was reserved. She told me she marked me down for Mondays, but if I wanted to work other days just let her know. Her tone was sort of annoyed, impatient. She has been warm and friendly in the past. I knew then that I most likely screwed up, and she probably was expecting me. Although, when I quickly scanned today's assignment, I didn't see my name.

This is so unlike me. I don't miss work, ever. I feel incredibly guilty, and am very concerned that my supervisor thinks I am a flake.

Out of guilt I marked myself down to work all day Thursday and Saturday. This was stupid, because I didn't need to work these days if I didn't want to. Somehow, in my warped brain I thought it might make up for missing today. For all I know they may not need staff on these days. I have this anxious, guilty feeling.

Sorry if I am not making sense and apologies for the ramble. I needed to talk.
Talk to your boss and tell her what you just told us.

If she's a good boss, at very the least it'll clear the air, if not help communicate more effectively and more.

However, if she's a bad bass, she will likely reveal herself as such dealing with this and you'll know you probably don't actually want to work there.
posted by loquacious 05 February | 20:54
I second loquacious. Just be honest that you're suffering from guilt, and that you feel bad for any misunderstanding. She's probably seen lots of people who come and go, some who don't care what tailspins they're abscenses cause. So, unless you really feel that going back to work was a mistake (and that's okay too, you gave it a shot) clear the air with the boss and start fresh.
posted by redvixen 05 February | 21:35
It seems you know when to show up for work and do. Don't guilt yourself into anything.
You want to work¿ You work. Want off¿ Off then, especially if you're getting your feet back in the door. Take it at your pace if you can ie: your work schedule.

Don't assume anything till you get the facts straight from the horses mouth, so to speak.
I think your child is in good hands, but separation anxiety is natural, especially after all this time.
I don't think you're rambling though. Just joining the work force again./ Welcome to work./
posted by alicesshoe 05 February | 21:36
Thanks so much guys. After she told me she had put me down for Mondays, I apologized. I probably should of mentioned this fact upthread. I tried to play it as if I had forgotten to mark myself down, and wanted to work an alternate day. I told her I was sorry a few times.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I'm sorry."

I don't know how convincing I was. Actually, I probably looked like an idiot.

My husband tried to convince me that she doesn't give a rat's ass. I need to get a grip, go in on Thursday, and forget about it.

Thanks for listening to my neurotic tale.
posted by LoriFLA 05 February | 22:00
Next time you're not sure, just call in. You could have a confederate you can ask to check whether you're marked or not. Or you could just speak to your boss directly -- "I think I may not have marked myself down, but if you need me, I'm ready to come in. It's up to you."

Or just get up and go in and wait for your boss to say, "Oh! I didn't know you were going to be here today."

It's a variation of the adage that your boss never notices when you work late, but always notices when you come in late. If you want to work extra hours, get in before the boss does.

As a part-timer, they're a bit suspicious of your commitment as it is.
posted by stilicho 06 February | 00:08
Thanks stilcho. These are good points.
posted by LoriFLA 06 February | 09:37
Crazed architect assaults bunny! || Spoon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HOME  ||   REGISTER  ||   LOGIN