(As recounted by music historian Harold Schoenberg.)

He was right, of course, zippos are totally for flamers.

As a former bassoon player, I resent the implication.

Better to sound like a bleating nanny-goat than a farting walrus.

His colleague replied, "Hei, bist du denn ein Kontrafagott?"

Thanks to a bassoonist I knew in college, I still call the instrument "the farting bed post."

you know, Bach ripped Pergolesi off like there was no tomorrow. it always breaks my heart that Pergolesi, one of the most successful composers of his era, the genius of Opera Buffa, was asked to write a new Stabat Mater for the Good Friday Mass in Naples (the Knights of the Virgin Mary wanted to replace the one they were using, written by Alessandro Scarlatti) and it quickly became a scandal because, the Church said, you don't ask the composer of sinner's music to write an ode to the Mother of God -- he was after all the man who had written La serva padrona.

of course, Pergolesi then wrote what became the most widely printed musical work of the 18th Century, his Stabat Mater, and died soon therafter. he was 26 years old.

All I can say is that all bassoonists are insane. Freaking ego-driven narcissistic megalomaniacs, they think everything revolves around them, and they'll do anything for more power.

Hey! I'm not insane!

Well... I may lust for power, but not any sort of power connected to a bassoon.

Oh, another thing about bassoonists - they will never admit their insanity. That's part of their insanity.
I suppose, Specklet, you're going to tell me you've never read this:
≡ Click to see image ≡

Of course I've never read that! I don't DO devil worship, young man!