MetaChat - THIS IS A SHOUTING AT CASHIERS THREAD!

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11 December 2006

THIS IS A SHOUTING AT CASHIERS THREAD! →[More:]DO I HAVE 11 CENTS? NO, I DON'T HAVE 11 CENTS. YES, I'M SURE. LEMME GUESS - YOU DON'T HAVE ENOUGH CHANGE FOR ME?! WOW, IT'S KINDA EARLY IN THE DAY FOR THAT ISN'T IT?! WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WHEN THE PERSON BEHIND ME NEEDS CHANGE? PERHAPS YOU SHOULD GO GET SOME MORE COINAGE FROM THE MANAGER! NO, I WON'T TAKE THIRTY FUCKING NICKELS! SORRY, PERSONAL POLICY. WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO BUY SOMETHING ELSE AND SEE IF IT ROUNDS OUT TO A NICE EVEN FIGURE FOR YOU?! YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR JOB TITLE IS? THAT'S RIGHT - A CASHIER. BUT YOU DON'T HAVE CASH, SO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MAKES YOU? YOU'RE A BOTTLE WITH A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM. YOU'RE AN UPSIDE DOWN SPOON. YOU'RE AN AWARDS SHOW. YOU'RE A BROKEN CASHIER, AND BROKEN CASHIERS ARE PRETTY USELESS TO ME. THANKS, YOU HAVE A NICE DAY TOO.

post by: Hellbient at: 18:21 | 27 comments

YOU ROUNDED UP?! YOU CAN'T ROUND UP. YOU CAN ROUND DOWN, BUT YOU CAN'T ROUND UP. NO, NOT EVEN A PENNY! YES, I'M EIGHTY.

posted by Hellbient 11 December | 18:24

hellbient, I feel your pain. Nothing makes me crazier than when someone (even when it's through no fault of their own) can't live up to the job title.

Cashiers without cash, Cleaning Ladies who don't clean, Managers who can't manage, and so on.

Waitresses, who don't seem to want to find out what I want at all, then don't seem inclined to let the kitchen know, or even bring me whatever they DID tell the kitchen I want. They have a special circle reserved in richat's hell.

I often wonder if they've read the job description. Do they have ANY idea what the job of waiting tables entails? I'm sure there are other things, but the above mentioned tasks seem rather central to the notion.

Now, please keep in mind that I know many EXCELLENT servers, and they make a good eating experience even better.

No caps, for fear that any further shouting may result in a shooting spree for hellbient...

posted by richat 11 December | 18:28

YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO'S NEXT IN LINE?! REALLY?! IT'S YOUR LINE, YOU CAN'T EVEN MAKE A MINIMAL EFFORT TO KEEP PEOPLE FROM CUTTING?!

posted by Hellbient 11 December | 18:29

GIMME 872 LOTTERY TICKETS, NOW!!

posted by Hellbient 11 December | 18:30

I WAS AT A SO-CALLED FANCY RESORT THIS WEEKEND. WE CHECKED IN AND WENT TO OUR ROOM. I WAS THIRSTY AND REALIZED THAT THE CLERK DIDN'T GIVE ME THE MINIBAR KEY. SO I CALLED GUEST SERVICES. ME: "I DIDN'T GET A MINIBAR KEY." HER: "IT WAS OFFERED TO YOU WHEN YOU CHECKED IN." LOOK LADY, DID YOU CHECK ME IN? DID I SOMEHOW FORGET WHAT HAPPENED ON THE FIVE MINUTE WALK TO MY ROOM? I'M ABOUT TO PAY YOUR HOTEL FIVE BUCKS FOR A CAN OF COKE, SO JUST SAY SORRY AND SEND A KEY UP TO MY ROOM.

posted by pickles 11 December | 18:35

What?! No mushrooms?

posted by mischief 11 December | 18:48

YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB. KEEP IT UP. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE HERE TO SERVE ME AT 1.00AM IN THE MORNING.

OH YOU'RE NOT. YOU WANT ME TO USE THE AUTOMATIC MACHINE. THE ONE THAT BEEPS ALARMINGLY WHENEVER I PUT VERY LIGHT ITEMS IN MY BAG. THE ONE THAT SEEMS INCAPABLE OF READING THE BAR CODE OF THIS BREAD AND REFUSES TO ACCEPT MY CARD. OK. I'LL GIVE THAT A GO.

posted by seanyboy 11 December | 18:53

THANK YOU, CASHIERS AND WAITRESSES, FOR GETTING THINGS RIGHT ABOUT 995/1000 TIMES. COLLECTIVELY, I CAN'T IMAGINE YOU'VE CAUSED ME MORE THAN A FEW MINUTES' INCONVENIENCE OVER THE SPAN OF MY ENTIRE LIFETIME. I'VE PROBABLY CAUSED YOU MORE THAN THAT. SO I HOPE WE'RE COOL.

posted by Wolfdog 11 December | 19:02

CASHIERS AND WAITRESSES, THANKS FOR GETTING THINGS RIGHT ABOUT 995/1000 TIMES. JUST ABOUT EVERYONE MAKES A FEW MISTAKES NOW AND THEN. BUT WHEN IT'S ONE OF THOSE 5 TIMES YOU FUCK UP, TAKE RESPONSIBILITY AND FIX IT WITH GRACE. DON'T MAKE ME FEEL SHITTY FOR MAKING YOU DO YOUR JOB.

posted by mullacc 11 December | 19:14

DEAR MS. CASHIER OF THE MONTH:
WHY DID YOU PUT THE PAPER BILLS IN MY HAND AND DUMP THE COINS ON TOP OF THEM? WHY DID YOU ASK ME IF I WANT THE RECEIPT IN THE BAG, AND THEN TRY TO HAND IT TO ME? I HAVE MY HANDS FULL, LADY, CAN'T YOU SEE THE PILE OF CHANGE IN ONE HAND AND MY WALLET IN THE OTHER? CAN YOU SEE "BAGGER-BOY BLUE" THERE TRYING TO HAND ME MY GROCERIES AT THE SAME TIME? HUNH? CAN YOU SEE THAT? THIS IS TOO MUCH PRESSURE! NOW I HAVE TO DO A WHOLE COIN TRANSFER/BILL CRAMMING MANEUVER, COUPLED WITH A BAG-GRAB AND RECEIPT-POCKET SHUFFLE, JUST SO MS "CHOWING A CANDY BAR IN THE LINE BEHIND ME" WILL STOP TRYING TO PUSH HER CART UP MY ASS!

GOD I HATE SHOPPING.

posted by disclaimer 11 December | 19:22

I'm sorry, sir, but if you're going to continue to shout at me, I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

I kinda wish they'd let me keep a shotgun behind the counter, but then I think having a button which actuates a trapdoor would be more fun.

posted by Eideteker 11 December | 19:37

What mullacc said. Yeah. We could all benefit from a little grace.

posted by richat 11 December | 20:36

I would just like to say that I would never, ever treat a cashier badly. I was one at a pharmacy for a while, and while the job isn't really that tough, the CUSTOMERS ARE A REAL PAIN IN THE ASS sometimes, and therefore I have a lot of respect for the work that cashiers and waitstaff do.

GOD I HATE CUSTOMERS.

posted by disclaimer 11 December | 20:57

BOO! YOU DON'T GET IT! THIS BE A SHOUT AT CASHIERS THREAD! YES FINE, WE'RE ALL CASHIERS, YOU HIPPIES! GRACE IS FINE, BUT NOT IN THE "SHOUT AT CASHIERS" THREAD! TAKE IT TO THE "THANK YOU CASHIERS" THREAD!

posted by Hellbient 11 December | 21:01

THIS JOB WOULD BE OK IF IT WASN'T FOR THE FUCKIN' CUSTOMERS!!!

posted by Eideteker 11 December | 21:05

OH MY GOD I JUST SHOUTED AT A CASHEW ON ACCIDENT. APOLOGIES ALL...

posted by Divine_Wino 11 December | 22:03

*fingers the trapdoor button, waiting for Wino to stagger a bit more to the left*

posted by Eideteker 11 December | 22:07

THE CASHEWS DESERVE YOUR WRATH, WINO. THEY HAVE POISONOUS SHELLS AND SEEK TO KILL US ALL.

posted by jrossi4r 11 December | 22:20

THANK YOU, CASHEWS, FOR GETTING LITTLE BITS OF YOURSELVES STUCK IN MY TEETH ABOUT 995/1000 TIMES. COLLECTIVELY, I CAN'T IMAGINE YOU'VE CAUSED ME MORE THAN A FEW MINUTES' INCONVENIENCE OVER THE SPAN OF MY ENTIRE LIFETIME, EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE TIME WHEN THE LITTLE BIT WOULDN'T COME OUT EASILY AND I HAD TO GET INTO MY CAR AND DRIVE TO THE NEAREST CONVENIENCE STORE FOR A PACK OF THOSE COOL LITTLE PLASTIC FLOSS/PICK THINGIES AND THE CASHIER THERE WAS A COMPLETE MORON AND A TOTAL ASSHOLE. BUT BESIDES THAT TIME YOU'VE BEEN GREAT AND I HOPE WE'RE COOL.

posted by iconomy 11 December | 22:41

I DON'T WANT TO SHOUT AT THE CASHIER! SHE KNEW WHAT ALL MY MUSHROOMS WERE! I WANT TO SHOUT AT THE CUSTOMER BEHIND ME WHO PUSHED HER CART INTO MY BUTT WHILE I WAS HELPING THE BAGGER LOAD MY GROCERIES SO NOW I'M TRAPPED IN A ONE FOOT SPACE BETWEEN MY CART AND HERS AND CAN'T GET MY RECEIPT! AND DID I MENTION THAT SHE HIT ME IN THE BUTT? SO I'LL SHOUT AT HER, BUT POLITELY! EXCUSE ME! EXCUSE ME, COULD YOU BACK UP PLEASE? THAT'S BETTER!

posted by found dog one eye 11 December | 22:55

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Hellbient 11 December | 23:15

The cashiers of Greece and I have come to a detente - they're still mean to me, but I've stopped crying.

posted by taz 12 December | 02:12

I don't think I've ever had a bad cashier experience. It's because I excel at picking the best line in stores, the fastest line with the most knowledgeable cashier. You know, the cashier that can count up your change, instead of reading off the register and handing it all to you in one lump. Sorry guys.

posted by muddgirl 12 December | 10:41

THIS JOB WOULD BE OK IF IT WASN'T FOR THE FUCKIN' CUSTOMERS!!!

One of my favorite quotes from college was from a beloved professor: "A University without students is like an ointment without flies." I don't think she made it up, but it still makes me laugh and is easily transferable to other customer-service situations.

Oh, erm...

HEY, WHEN THERE'S A LINE OF 10 PEOPLE WAITING, AND YOU OPEN A NEW LINE, DON'T LET THE ASSHOLE FROM THE END OF THE LINE GET IN THE NEW LINE FIRST!

posted by Rock Steady 12 December | 10:53

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by jonmc 12 December | 10:58

Just Because They Serve You, Dosen't Mean They Like You.

posted by jonmc 12 December | 11:00

I HAVE DREAMS, NAY NIGHTMARES ABOUT BEING A CASHIER AGAIN. THEY USUALLY START WITH ME IN A GROCERY STORE ON A SLOW DAY AND THEN LINES START PILING UP AND THEM SOMEONE HAS TO KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THE PRICE IS ON THE SINGLE LEMON HE'S BUYING BUT SINCE I'VE ONLY MEMORIZED THE CODE FOR LEMONS BUT NOT THE PRICE, I DON'T KNOW OFF OF THE TOP OF MY HEAD, SO I HAVE TO ASK SOMEONE ELSE AND THEY START SHOUTING AT ME AND I CRY.

IT'S EITHER THAT, OR I HAVE NIGHTMARES ABOUT WORKING CUSTOMER SERVICE AT BEST BUY AGAIN. SOMEONE THREW A MICROPHONE IN MY DIRECTION ONCE AND IT ALMOST HIT ME. I DON'T THINK HE WAS TRYING TO HIT ME ON PURPOSE, BUT IT MADE MY ADRENALINE LEVELS GO UP JUST THE SAME. HAVING WORKED THE CUSTOMER SERVICE DESK AT BEST BUY FOR FOUR YEARS MADE ME HATE CHRISTMAS. I'M JUST NOW GETTING OVER THAT.

posted by TrishaLynn 12 December | 16:25

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