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Fake LV Speedy Bag from Chinatown
1 Liter Bottle of Kiehl's Creme de Corps
Long shirts
Lip Gloss
Scented Candles
Gift Certificates to: Express, Ann Taylor Loft
The willpower to lose 25 pounds, and a universal cure for pain. The Brand upon the Brain on DVD since it's never going to show around here anyway.
Time enough to finish my plan to read all of Sir Walter Scott's "Waverly" novels, so I can get back to reading John Ruskin, so I can get back to reading Gene Wolfe. I AM SICK OF BEING A GODDAMN MAGPIE.
Really good peppermint bark made with peppermint sticks that aren't too hard but aren't totally powdery either. Astonishingly difficult to find.
I actually get to BE SANTA this year so you all should just talk to me about what you all want in this world.
As for myself, there are simply too many things right now to ask for and conceivably get by the 25th. I think a Warm Welcome would be nice, followed by a Great Phone Call and a side of I Miss You would suffice.
* A nicer house closer to my work.
* One of them slick new Nanos.
* A 12" Mac Book Pro (yeah, I know they don't make them, that's why it's a wishlist!)
* Rebel XTi with an assortment of lenses
* Canon SD800 IS (yes, I need two cameras)
* 36 inch plasma or LCD (I'm not picky)
* My wife's client list to double every month until
* Peace on earth and goodwill towards all men and women (except jerks like Dick Cheney)
I want another “HEY! GOOD GAWD! GIVE DA DRUMMER SOME!”
And another girl ’cause my ex gave the plumber some
Plus another hit ‘cause I ain’t seen number one
Since I sent Bootsy up to Harlem on a number run
And a mistletoe where my old one always hung
“YAAAAAAAAAOWWW!”, sorry gotta go. Damn almost lost a lung!
I dunno. You know, I can circle stuff in catalogs, send e-mail hints, but nothing out there is an overwhelming "I GOTTA HAVE IT!!" Everybody getting along for longer than a day would be really nice. And kids who pick up after themselves without being nagged. Heck, while I'm wishing, I wish they'd chip in more around here, and help each other out.
God, if I could get the kids to pick up after themselves (with or without nagging), I would be glad to forgo each and every Christmas present fate has in store for me for the rest of eternity. I have plenty of socks anyway.
I want people to take me seriously when I tell them they better send me their wish lists by Thanksgiving, because I'm not going Christmas shopping after December 5th, and giving people tons of stuff that doesn't fit, is the wrong color, and/or isn't cool/duplicates stuff they already have/isn't age appropriate sucks. Anybody that doesn't get their written wish list for Xmas 2007 to me by Oct. 31, 2007, complete with accurate sizes and real color/material/style preferences, allergies and medical restrictions, is permanently Off My List.
photo by splunge
photo by TheophileEscargot
photo by Kronos_to_Earth
photo by ethylene
