When I went down to the blood donation, I was told that I could give blood, but it wouldn't go directly to Daddy, because banking it had to be done several days in advance. After Daddy went in to be prepped, I went to get something to eat and then came back to the surgery waiting area.I was alone. The night of the reading, my mother had been nasty to my aunt--they've never gotten along; chupahija doesn't ask: she orders--so she and my uncle didn't show up until the operation was over.There's another waiting area on a separate floor and my mother went down there. One of the surgery nurses came out periodically to give me updates and to call my mother on her cell. My brother came sometime after Daddy went in and sat with my mother until about twenty minutes before the surgery ended, when they came up to where I was. He had been able to give Daddy blood, because he came several days before I did. I had emailed Adam before I left and let him know that I did not want to be spoken to in a condescending tone of voice; that I did not deserve to be treated like that. He replied that he didn't want me throwing bombs. I went over to him and started to tell him that I wished that I could have given Daddy the blood and he wouldn't let me finish, saying with condescension that I was spinning out of control and telling ME how I was feeling. I told him not to fucking tell me about my own self. He said not to speak to him unless it was life or death. My uncle said he didn't want to witness this while his brother was having major surgery, so I turned to my aunt and asked what the plans for Thanksgiving were. She told me she and my uncle were going to her sister-in-laws and I broke down--no one had said anything about my being included. My uncle started rambling on and on about how I was stressed and it was okay to cry and I ran into the bathroom.
I came out and screamed at my brother, "I told you that I fucking didn't want to be spoken to with condescension, you supercilious little shit!" and then told him and my mother that I ought to say Kaddish for the both of them. The nurse came out a few minutes later and let us know Daddy was being prepped for ICU and we wouldn't be able to see him for an hour. I went with my aunt and uncle to a deli across the street. My aunt told me she'd ask her family if I could join them for Thanksgiving. We came back to the ICU waiting room and then my mother and brother walked in. I told him to get the fuck out, that I was there first and I didn't want to fucking be in the same room as him. He glared at me and went into the hall. Daddy wasn't quite ready for another twenty minutes. When I went in he was conscious, but he couldn't talk because he had a tube down his throat. I'm going back to the hospital in about half an hour.

I want to be with my other and the man I call mama--these are two separate people; Regie and I had a falling out several years ago about his behavior when he drinks, we are able to be civil around each other now, but I miss his hugs.

Taz, could you please let us know the character limit for a new post?

I am very confused by this (maybe because I've been out of the Mecha loop?), but I hope it all turns out okay.

*hugs brujita*

Sorry this is all so sucktacious, bunny. Family stress on top of your concern for your father you so don't need right now. I hope he comes through okay. I also hope that you get some good time with supportive people around you this weekend.

((((brujita))))

My thoughts are with you this weekend and I know you have the inner strength to be the bigger person and ignore all of the surrounding shit in order to help your Dad recover.

I know you didn't ask for advice before when you first started talking about this, but I wonder if maybe willfully ignoring them might help make things a little easier for you and a lot easier for your Dad.

(((brujita)))

Family illness and the holidays bring out the absolute worst in some people. I really do wish you and your father all the best.

Huuuuuuuuuugs!

oh, brujita. Thinking of you over here, and hoping for the best outcome for everything.

{{{{brujita}}}}

I'm slightly confused also. Thanks for the update, and I hope the bumps smooth out very soon.

shit, good luck. Take care of yourself, too.

xoxoxoxoox

take care, brujita. family time on holidays is stressful by itself, even worse when the family is not getting along. Take care of your dad and yourself. The others do not matter, or at least shouldn't since they behave like that.

(((brujita)))

And what carmina wrote is spot on. Take care of yourself.

Thanks for the hugs and good wishes, bunnies! Daddy was much better when I saw him today--sitting up and having his liquid lunch: soup, jello, lemon ice, juice and fruit tea. He should be home in the next few days; my brother is staying with them but I don't know for how much longer. The house was remodeled--skylights put in and the bed and bathrooms made bigger--but they didn't replace the front door. It still has a dent from the time golden boy wouldn't let me in the house and I hit it with my lunchbox.

There's another issue with the kitchen designer that won't be resolved until I come back. I let her know that I didn't want her or any member of her staff showing up in my place while the work was going on and she claimed that it "wasn't an option". I sent an account of what has happened so far with the designer to my lawyer and she let me know that it wasn't her field, so I'll have to ask her if she knows someone who is.

I'll see Daddy in the morning and then have T-day with my aunt's family. On Friday I'll call the acupuncturist I was seeing before I moved to NYC and see if I can get an appointment with her--she also does massage.

Happy belated to small_ruminant and Happy (US) Thanksgiving to citizens, residents and expats!

Best wishes for all you go through, brujita, and hope your dad heals quickly.