I heard that Phil Collins was playing "Grand Theft Auto" and a guy broke into his house and raped his wife and Phil didn't even stop playing, and then saw the guy in real life and he was sinking in a pool and Phil Collins went R1, R2, L1, R2, Left, Down, Right, Up, Left, Down, Right, Up, and then Phil totally killed the guy with a chainsaw.

That's what I heard.

I heard that in the future, there are no guitars, and Phil Collins is the overlord of the universe.

I'm not sure where the GTA comes in, though.

well. vice city is basically grand theft auto: miami vice and that song featured prominently in the miami vice movie (the original, not that piece of shite that just came out). plus collins was in an episode of miami vice. and it was a huge huge song in the early eighties. but mainly the miami vice angle, i think.

also. my back is killing me and i can't sleep. fucking cinder blocks.

Yeah, but "he" is in the video and a character refers to Phil as having a crime for you to commit. I thought it was pretty funny and weird.

One of my doormen looks like the guy on the GTA San Andreas box.

When I googled the lyrics for Romeo Void's "Never Say Never" the only site that had the complete ones was a GTA walkthrough--huh?!


Sunsuit girls must be discreet!

Heh, yeah, weird. There's screen shots of it in this month's arena magazine. Couldn't quite believe it myself. On the subject of Arena, my brother is the features editor and blogs on their site...

Oh this is doing my head in now. What's that Phil Collins song where he totally rips on TV preachers? I can't find it on the intertubes. I suspect a conspiracy.

Aha - It's Genesis.
Jesus he knows me

I thought it was pretty funny and weird.

It's a little-known fact that all drug lords are secretly rock stars.

If you buy a third-party cheat gadget, and then run a few obscure and unofficial patches which you download from message boards, your car becomes bulletproof (but not explosion-proof), and Phil starts smacking the asses of private-school boys with a Ping-Pong paddle. Or something like that--these Rockstar games are starting to blur.

As long as I'm making a videogame post:
1. Clubhouse Games is indescribably awesome.
2. Guitar Hero 2 comes out soon.
3. Y'know, I think I might be tired of the GTA franchise.
4. That AskMe about the guy with all the MAME ROMs? Standards about posts about illegal acts confuse me.

while the mention of "phil" undoubtedly refers to gary busey's character, phil cassidy, it is certainly strange to phil collins (versus some Love Fist/Gurning Chimps equivalent) make an actual in-game(?) appearance... as gta usually stays bound w/in its own universe, of course. is it possible that kent paul the unknown 5th member of genesis??

also, im glad to see vice city's golf course will at least be somewhat functional. and swimming, finally.

Cold Chef is totally right. I read that on Snopes. Only I don't think it was a chainsaw. Maybe a katana or some other melee weapon. (God I loved Vice City.)

Guitar Hero 2 comes out soon
Have you seen the new playlist? I'm so excited I get to pretend to be Chrissie Hynde AND Nigel Tufnel.

WE ARE SPINAL TAP FROM THE UK. THIS MUST BE THE USA!

OK, here's a joke

do you know the difference between a 180-pound bag of shit and Phil Collins?


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the bag

So, y'know how Phil did that social-conscience song, 'Another Day in Paradise,' about how, when he goes to vacation (by which I mean, 'on holiday') in tropical resort areas, it bums him out that the locals are all broke and desperate and so forth? Why did that make him seem (to me) like such a prick?

Perhaps because his head resembles a penis?

≡ Click to see image ≡

To be fair to Phil, he was pretty badass back in the early Genesis years:

≡ Click to see image ≡

Isn't the conventional wisdom that Phil totally wrecked Genesis, pushing aside Peter Gabriel's artsy-ness in favor of bland corporate pop-rock? Though I suppose there's another side to that argument (and it's advanced by the protagonist of American Psycho).

That said, I like some of his videos.

Well, that's definitely true, but his drumming was still a big part of the classic prog-era Genesis sound, and he wrote and sang several of the songs on those early albums. Even after Gabriel left the band, their first two albums were pretty good, if a bit more decorous. I'd say things really started going south with Duke, and ABACAB, one album later, sealed the deal.

And that's more than I thought I'd ever write about Genesis.

Okay, you're not going to believe this, but one time when I was about ten years old I was riding in the back of our family pickup truck. The dog was back there with me and I was drinking a can of Schewppes Ginger Ale. Well, the dog was really interested in this can of ginger ale. The dog was all up in my face; she was trying to smell what I was drinking. I was like, Damn it's just a ginger ale. And I held the can down from my lips, so she get a good whiff of the Schweppes.

At that very moment "Sussudio" by Phil Collins came on the radio and my dad turned it up really loud. Guess he was into the song. Now I don't know whether it was the smell of the ginger ale or the sound of Phil Collins, but something affected my dog. She passed out on the bed of the truck and could not be revived for several minutes. True story.

That reminds me of a really bad Mad Magazine joke:

Q: Where did Phil Collins write Sussudio?

A: In his stu-stu-studio.

Atom Eyes, if that ws in Mad they ripped it from David Letterman. Letterman said that to Collins when he played on the show. (Though I guess the theft could have been the other way around.)

Or maybe they both came up with it independently, like Newton and Leibniz with calculus, only less funny.