this is oddly cathartic →[More:]
so here I am in the midst of finishing a gargantuan pumpkin cheesecake. it's about twenty minutes from coming out of the oven and right now the entire apartment is bathed in the heady aroma of pumpkin pie spice and 3 pounds of Philly's finest.

dibs on a slice anyone?

it's the biggest cheesecake recipe I've ever seen or made. I think this thing is gonna feed not only my colleagues but prolly all of mecha and mefi and maybe some extra for leftovers.

anyways earlier on I was following the roommate's recipe for a cookie crumb crust. like all his recipes it was pretty basic: "mash 1 box shortbread cookies, mix with 1 stick melted butter, refrigerate".

he's a really, really good cook that lad, however his recipes tend towards the spartan on the details.

sooo... there I was wandering around the living room with a box of lorna doones and a 4 quart steel mixer bowl, wondering how in the fuck I was going to mash up an entire box of cookies - seeing as we're somewhat light on kitchen gear at the mo, not to mention the food processor went tits up on us about two weeks ago.

Now, might I add that we do have nine bikes and seventeen pairs of wheels and about five thousand eight hundred seventy-two bicycle-related doo-dads and whatchamajiggers including a huge, 48" tall locking rollaway tool chest full of every bike part and maintenance option known to god (you know, those kind car mechanics have? we got one, only it's full of bike tools).

then inspiration struck as my eye lit upon ye olde 12 oz. claw hammer.

turns out a 12 oz. claw hammer is the dog's nutz for mashing cookies, especially in one of those cheapassed Target steel mixer bowls cos the profile of the claw and the bottom of the bowl marry up like peas n carrots. So I wrapped that hammer up in a floursack rag, stuck one of my old Stabbing Westward cds in the stereo and got jiggy with it. it freaked out the cat and I'm sure the downstairs neighbours wondered what the aitch I was up to, but as they say in the movie Office Space: god DAMN it feels good to be a gangsta.

I feel so much better now. thank you all for listening.