Three other prisoners were also found with phones in their colons, including one who also had a charger.

Charger? These people are kinky.

Officials said they were using the phones to direct criminal activities on the street.

Yeah, STINKY criminal activities!

"This phone was in your Daddy's pocket when his gang was picked up down in San Salvador. He was captured and put in a El Salvadoran prison camp. Now he knew if the cops ever saw the phone it'd be confiscated. Taken away. The way your Daddy looked at it, this phone was your birthright. He'd be damned if any pigfaces were gonna put their greasy hands on his boy's birthright. So he hid it, in the one place he knew he could hide something: his ass. Five long years he held this phone, up his ass. Then, just before he died of dysentery, he gave me the phone. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of plastic up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the phone to you."

Heeee!

"Naw, dude, 'salright. Y'all can make the calls..."