MetaChat - Lettuce bring out our puns

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23 August 2006

Lettuce bring out our puns In the young adult novel I'm writing, the heroine winds up having to wear a really nasty frou frou pale green crinolined bridesmaid dress complete with butt bow for her horrible aunt's wedding. The boy next door/her love interest isn't unsympathetic but is addicted to puns and so keeps making some cracks about the dress after the heroine's father comments it makes her look like a big head of lettuce. I'd like the word play to range from the really awful to the inspired. What are some suitable lettuce/salad-related puns?

post by: Orange Swan at: 13:19 | 21 comments

Like..."That dress should have romained at the shop where you first saw it"? That kind of pun?

posted by iconomy 23 August | 13:26

I just can't seem to leave this one alone. Nice job with the dressing, by-the-way: is it ranch, or blue cheese?

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 August | 13:27

Lettuce pray...

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 August | 13:28

He could say something like "Wow. That dress is really....green. Everything's green Butterhead".

posted by iconomy 23 August | 13:30

Beware the Ides of March, there, Caesar.

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 August | 13:32

Perhaps it's a little risque, but he could always call someone a tosser.

posted by ooga_booga 23 August | 13:37

So far he's called her Princess Iceberg and "his little tossed salad".

posted by Orange Swan 23 August | 13:45

Actually, I think a better wording of the "dressing" pun might be: "How long have you been dressing yourself? By-the-way: is that ranch, or blue cheese?

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 August | 13:45

He could make a crouton joke. "I think you lost a crouton." Or "I think your crouton's on crooked."

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 August | 13:48

Are young adults going to get the tossed salad reference? Personally, I didn't know what that was until my early twenties. Am I naive?

posted by Specklet 23 August | 13:51

Goodness. I didn't know the street meaning of "tossed salad" until I looked it up just now. I'd heard the term "tosser" but had no idea what it meant. Perhaps I shouldn't use that one.

posted by Orange Swan 23 August | 13:54

So far he's called her Princess Iceberg and "his little tossed salad".

Those are puns? Not to sound snarky or anything, but that doesn't strike me as wordplay. So you just want things he can call her? How about Rebecca Romaine ;)

Argh don't use tosser or tossed salad...hehe. Don't go there!

Are young adults going to get the tossed salad reference?

Hee. My daughter told me what a tossed salad was, when she was 14. I had to ask her.

posted by iconomy 23 August | 14:03

Olive your dress, honey(mustard); the first time I slaw it! No, no, don't get mad, I really mint it!

(Make joke here about how she's going to get mad enough to stab him and something to do with Ceasar.)

posted by Specklet 23 August | 14:03

Just needs a piece of Bibb lettuce on the front.

posted by sarah connor 23 August | 14:04

Peas, baby, it's a lovely day, and I just know we're going to have bunches of fun! Leaf everything to me, as we head off to the wedding.

posted by Specklet 23 August | 14:06

I thought puns were the lowest form of humor, until I saw your dress.

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 23 August | 14:21

I learned puns at my mother's knee, a low joint.

posted by sarah connor 23 August | 14:24

"Romaine calm. I'm sure her hearts are in the right place."

Something about adding fresh-ground pepper to her dress/hair?

Do people still eat iceberg-wedge salads? "Wedge" should be easy-ish to work in.

Salad tongs?

Sorry, I know most of these are vocab suggestions! But maybe it'll inspire.

posted by occhiblu 23 August | 14:25

A question as to whether the wedding has an open salad bar?

posted by occhiblu 23 August | 14:26

"Hope it's not too hot, you might wilt."
"That's my girl, all full of oil and vinegar."
"Oh, my Green Goddess..."

posted by me3dia 23 August | 14:33

-It isn't easy being green

-If there's grass on the field, play ball?

-you're supposed to smoke grass, not wear it?

-Double your pleasure, double your fun?

I apologize for the previous comment. I am tired and brain addled. I want to go home.

posted by SassHat 23 August | 16:33

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