MetaChat is an informal place for MeFites to touch base and post, discuss and
chatter about topics that may not belong on MetaFilter. Questions? Check the FAQ. Please note: This is important.
If you have sufficient priviledges, install the standalone client. Or you could do what I did the last time I had similar problems: ask for admin privs. I didn't expect to get them either, but it worked.
So let me get this straight - your workplace has issued you a PC that is only allowed to connect remotely to your Citrix server via dialup? And this was intentional on their part?