MetaChat - Today's question:

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13 April 2006

Today's question: You are given the opportunity to ask one question to anyone in the world, and you're guaranteed to find out the absolute truth. Who would you pick, and what would be your question?

post by: sisterhavana at: 08:55 | 34 comments

I'd ask my crush if it is merely circumstances that keep us apart.

posted by dame 13 April | 08:56

I'd ask the entire population of the world: this was a joke, right?

posted by jonmc 13 April | 08:58

I'd ask OJ if he did it.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 13 April | 09:07

Ask the pope if he really believes he's the mouthpiece of God.

posted by seanyboy 13 April | 09:10

The next stranger I meet. The question would be "how are you going?".

(Or Stephen Hawking - "You're making that stuff up, right?").

posted by GeckoDundee 13 April | 09:14

Good question. I'd probably ask the appropriate top U.S. military person if UFOs are extraterrestrial... or basically, the real question: "do we have physical proof of intelligent extraterrestrial life"?

posted by taz 13 April | 09:18

well, taz, the big question is do we have any proof of intelligent terrestrial life.

posted by jonmc 13 April | 09:21

I'd ask myself why I'm no good at these thinking questions.

posted by mike9322 13 April | 09:24

I'd ask ask a multi-billionaire "what can I say to you to make you happily give me 10 million dollars?"

posted by Capn 13 April | 09:28

jon, that one's already been answered to my satisfaction; for reference please see: every war since the dawn of man.

Ah, Capn!!! I thought about something like that, but then got distracted by shiny aliens.

posted by taz 13 April | 09:33

I would ask a horse, "why the long face?"

posted by Divine_Wino 13 April | 09:33

I'd ask this one particular woman if she'd like to dance.

posted by Hugh Janus 13 April | 09:56

I'd ask what dame asks. To a different person, I hope. dame, you and I need to drink up to our crushes next time we get together!

posted by carmina 13 April | 09:57

Hugh, ask her! Pleaaaaseeee! There is nothing worse than missed opportunities.

posted by carmina 13 April | 10:01

She's thousands of miles from me.

posted by Hugh Janus 13 April | 10:06

Hugh, I find in these situations, screaming FUCK GEOGRAPHY doesn't help at all.

posted by mike9322 13 April | 10:11

Hugh, what carmina said... Definitely ask.

And, I'd ask Dr. Ruth if she ever actually used any of that stuff. And my 90-year-old rather adorable adopted mom who makes amazing matzah balls, how in the world, after all that Dr. Ruth, did I still have to explain (rather red-facedly) what a dildo was (don't ask).

posted by Pips 13 April | 10:12

Hmmm... thousands of miles. Definitely complicates things (or not).

posted by Pips 13 April | 10:17

Another vote for Hugh asking.

posted by Miko 13 April | 10:19

My questionee would be J.J. Abrams. My question would go something like this:

"Okay, what I want to know is . . . well, lemme see, where do I start, okay, what do the numbers - no, hold on, where'd desmond disapp - no, wait, not that either, oh, I know, what's Cereb - hold on, no, my question is definitely this: who or what is "he" - no, that's not right. Just a second. Let me get my thoughts together."

(Pause.)

(Gives up.)

"What the fuck, man? I mean, what the fucking fuck??????"

posted by deadcowdan 13 April | 10:28

I would ask a horse, "why the long face?"
And I'd ask a Polar Bear "Why the big ............... paws?"

posted by seanyboy 13 April | 10:28

I think I have a letter to send first.

posted by Hugh Janus 13 April | 10:29

I'd ask Jesus what he'd like to say to to folks these days.

posted by Specklet 13 April | 10:32

I'd ask my ex-wife why she fucked me up so badly for so long.

But then again, I hope to never talk to her again. So, lemme reconsider.

I'd ask Specklet what Jesus said.

posted by tr33hggr 13 April | 10:38

Let me take this opportunity, however, to tell you all how terribly sick I've been the past week, during which I've also been switching over to my new position and moving (at my job, not home). It's all kept me away from MetaChat for the most part.

And I'll be damned if I didn't really miss you all.

posted by tr33hggr 13 April | 10:39

I'd ask Jesus what he'd like to say to to folks these days.

It'd probably be along the lines of "OMG, WTF! LOL!"

posted by Capn 13 April | 10:41

I'd ask myself how I really feel about stuff.

posted by omiewise 13 April | 10:43

tr33 I'm so sorry you've been sick! If I'd known I'da sent chicken soup!

and yeah I'd ask specklet what Jesus said, too.

posted by chewatadistance 13 April | 10:51

I'd ask Jesus what he'd like to say to to folks these days.

It'd probably be along the lines of "OMG, WTF! LOL!"

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by essexjan 13 April | 11:22

I'd ask Thomas Merton what really happened in Polonnaruwa.

posted by tommasz 13 April | 11:23

Jan, that pic makes me laugh!

posted by Specklet 13 April | 11:35

And on a seasonal note ...
≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by essexjan 13 April | 11:57

That's ok chew, I'm coming out of the sickness now. Veggie soup would be appreciated though! :)

posted by tr33hggr 13 April | 12:54

I'd ask my crush if it is merely circumstances that keep us apart.

I agree with dame and carmina.

posted by halonine 13 April | 15:17

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