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23 February 2006
let's make up a new holiday. what holiday would YOU create?
TazzenMera wherein we all drink ouzo and wear grape leaves and generally do things people who do not live in Greece imagine the people who do live in Greece do.
Traditions would include:
-day off work
-gatherings at loved ones' houses
-warm beds/couches with blankies
-flannel jammies
-savory finger foods
-the whuffle whisky shot
I've mentioned this before, but Oct. 16th is my personal holiday. Rossi Day. I think everyone should have a self-declared holiday.
But I'd also like Free Foot day, where I don't have to wear shoes anywhere. Certainly, there'd have to be some concessions made for health considerations, like businesses could put down disposable walkways or something. But my tootsies like being free.
On Barry day you get to a wear a sash that says "Bitch set me up!"
if you've ever been pinched in a shitty motel for smoking krills.
Do you want to know the secret of ulimited free energy? Hook our love for Marion up to a turbine."
If today was my day for a holiday it would be "MY Bref smell like six miles of shit because when i assembled my Beef Pho I was like, a million raw onions please, I need actual stink lines coming out of my mouth day",
You get stink lines, your interlocutors get exxed out eyes, little "Ack!" and "PU!" thought balloons, and a squiggle for a mouth with a diagonally stuck-out tongue.
Me standing all alone in a desert with two buzzards circling above me.
Next monday is:
A plump National Park Ranger finds my dessicated and pickedover carcass embracing a cactus 300 yards from the road and decides not to call it in as the paperwork is just too much of a pain and all there is in my wallet is a picture of Manute Bol anyway day.
(Should probably send girls are pretty a check for my holiday stylings day)
First off, when you work swing or graveyard, everyday is Nap Day.
Also, y'all are thinking too small. One extra day a year? Let's expand the weekend instead. While I appreciate the sacrifices made by those who fought for the 40 hour work week, I think we're doing a disservice to their memory by sticking with the status quo. I propose the 32 hour week as the new standard for full-time employment. Working five days to get two off is just not the right ratio in my book. Plus, employment rates would skyrocket. Or at least bottle rocket.
How about I've-Got-My-Shit-Together Day to reward people that actually pay attention in life and, well, have their shit together. You get that day off from work or school if you remember it's I've-Got-My-Shit-Together Day. If you forget, you work. But you're not allowed to remind others that the day is coming up. If you do, you don't get the day off. And if you forget the holiday and show up for work, you have to do the work of those that had their shit together and took the holiday off. And in case the greeting card industry card needs to get involved, the tradition can be the the next day you send cards to the chumps that forgot and had to work.
Hall Pass Day would be good tho, where you get no shit for anything all day. Like having a magical Hall Pass that gets you out of trouble or excuses you.
bmarkey, I am convinced that I could work a 25 hour working week and get the same amount done as I do now. I would give up internet during work hours if my boss only expected me to be here 25/week. She, unfortunately, disagrees.
I have already invented a holiday. It is called Birthday Week, and it is 15 DAYS LONG. Basically, any day that is within a week of your birthday is part of Birthday Week. My birthday is March 4th, so my Birthday Week starts Feb 25th (this Saturday!) and ends March 11th. Benefits include asking people to do silly things for you or trying to get away with stuff, and if people protest, pouting in a cute way and saying, "but... but it's my Birthday Week!" Also: sitting quietly and suddenly realising, "it's my Birthday Week! yay!"
Not that I don't try to get away with such behaviour all year long, it just means I have an excuse.
Hammock and Picnic Day, where you get to loll all day in a hammock and eat good picnic food. People bring you things to read, the music is always good, and rain never appears.
photo by splunge
photo by TheophileEscargot
photo by Kronos_to_Earth
photo by ethylene
