That's the way all money arguments end up. I say wait for him to fall asleep, then shave his balls and draw smiley faces on his butt.

Just say, "I'm not bad! Not bad a-tall." The last part in a real hokey voice.

Bad idea. Anyway, I think you're KEWL!

At least you have a fabulous wardrobe!

Money arguments never go well.

*thinks happy swimming thoughts for dame*

dame, you are bad. In the sexiest, most delicious sense of the word. Embrace it and tell the roomie to f-off. :-)

Had one of those this past weekend with one of my roommates, who happens to also be my ex-boyfriend, and a current co-worker. Yeah, I know it's f*cked up, but what can I do?

I wish I could, jrossi. But (a) he's friends with other people I know, so I get the feeling that there could be a lot of people refusing to talk to me and (b) this always happens to me: I get in an argument, I remain the stubborn princess I've always admitted to being, and then there are ten more people who hate me. Yet, the chances of me ending up not a stubborn princess are about 1 in 8 kazillion. So . . . frowny.

I remain the stubborn princess I've always admitted to being, and then there are ten more people who hate me.

If it's any consolation, I know exactly what you mean.

Aw, dame that sounds awful. I also pay for sticking to my guns on occasion, but I don't think I could do it any other way, and I suspect the same is true for you. Ride it out dear, and it will settle down.

Roommates really blow sometimes. Mine, for example. Our lease runs out at the end of feb. So my roommies have taken this as carte blanche to act like total assholes in terms of everything, because we won't be living together for much longer. Like not paying me their share of the the electric bill until I threaten to kill them.

I feel your pain. Don't let it get the best of you.

Like not paying me their share of the the electric bill until I threaten to kill them.

Kill them with electricity. That'll teach 'em.

So my roommies have taken this as carte blanche to act like total assholes?

Really? What the fuck is wrong with everyone these days?

This is why I refuse to live with anyone who is not totally dependent on me (as I am on them) for living, as a team, otherwise there are just too many opportunities for people to be shitty.

Dame,
I have a suggestion, although it will still suck. Treat it like a game or something you do not have a stake in, purely as tactic and to get it resolved with a minimum of pain, it's cold but sometimes life calls for coldness. In other words remain convinced of your rightness and be a princess but be a cold badass sneaky princess like Neal Stephenson would write about.

Hmm, that reminds me; I still owe my roommate for electricity this month.

I'm my own roomate, and I hate myself. I most frequently fight with myself about money, or that's the way it starts, and then either I or I gets all nasty and it somehow becomes about my worth as a person. I hate it. I tried to move out, but I followed myself and so I seem to be stuck. One thing I've found to be useful is to tire myself out, then I can't bitch at myself about everything, but then I also end up wanting to sleep, so then it's just both of us asleep. At least the apartment is quiet, unlike when only one of us is tired, but I can't get anything done when I'm asleep.

I've tried, more than once, to have a conversation with myself about this stuff, but I find, frankly, that it always devolves into semantics and sophistry. To tell you the truth, and I would hate it if you repeated this to me, so let's just keep it between us, I don't think that I'm smart enough to even understand what it is that I do when these petty little squabbles start. That, coupled with my overweaning sense of pride and a certain defensiveness, which I don't even know how to mention to myself, almost guarantees a trainwreck when I try to be frank about it all.

I've gotten a lot of advice from other people, but, it's mostly been worthless. Like you, I'm in the unenviable position of having to at least preserve the semblance of civility in this relationship because I'm friends with almost everyone that I'm friends with. Worse, I have the feeling that many of our mutual friends enjoy hanging out with me more than with me, just because I'm a much more laid-back guy (which contributes to a lot of the money squabbles we do end up having) than I am. If I had to be honest with myself, I'd say that people like me just a bit better because I'm more able to just cut loose and have a good time. I'm a bit naturally morose, and I can't play pool nearly as well.

If I had to give you advice, and if you've read what I've written above, you may think that I'm in no position to give advice about this, I'd say that you should try and have a talk about getting back to the original topic. I try this from time to time, and it can work, I even tend to admit to a certain vulnerability and dread about the direction that the argument has taken, and I point out that I feel like the potential damage from the discussion is exceeding the original topic. Sometimes I listen, but also, sometimes, I'm an asshole and my attempt at redirecting things has no effect.

I'm stuck, though, because although I said that I hate myself, I've really never had a better roommate. I've finally figured out how to get myself to clean the toilet, and, man, some of the times we have when we're just sitting around are awesome. I've got this one story I tell about going to this Pepperidge Farm Outlet Store with my friend Aaron that is fucking hilarious, at least if I'm drunk enough, and I've really got the telling down to an art. So, what are you gonna do, I've got to live with myself, I'm afraid all of my friends would hang out with me if we split up, and even I can see that although I'm smarter, I'm a good guy at heart.

Good luck!

Omiewise, that is hilarious. And I only found one spelling error.

effect for affect?

OmieWise, you just made my day.

overweaning should be overweening

unless of course he's referring to the litter he just whelped.

OmieWise, that was hilarious.

overweening is a word?

Heh. If it helps, omiewise, I like you better.