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09 January 2006

Accessorizing... Me: Hey, you wanna crash out?
Prospective Nonexistant Boyfriend: Sure, yumz!
Me: Oh, BTW I do have to wear a mask with pressurized air flying into my nose.→[More:]I got the results from my overnight sleep study, and I've got me some sleep apnea. Stopped breathing 52 times! So, it looks like I will now have to adjust to life with a CPAP machine. Anyone else in here have one of those, and if so, are there types that are less burdensome?

post by: moonbird at: 20:25 | 25 comments

My mom got one of these yesterday, moonbird. She was having some wicked health problems because of the apnea. For a while it looked life-threatening.

Learn to love the machine!

posted by mudpuppie 09 January | 20:30

MB - don't let something like that slow you down. People who can't adapt to that you don't want around anyhow. A sleep-masked Moonbird is better than no Moonbird at all.

I have spoken.

posted by Lipstick Thespian 09 January | 20:35

I did a road trip (sharing motel rooms) with a friend who had one. Once you get used to it, it's not so strange.

Anyway, if you're lucky, your boyfriend will keep you awake all night!

posted by matildaben 09 January | 20:37

Does it look like a gas mask? If so, get your boyfriend one and you can pretend you're Marines under seige at Iwo Jima. Toy M-16's at your own discretion.

posted by jonmc 09 January | 20:38

What are the consequences if you forego the machine on special occasions?

posted by danostuporstar 09 January | 20:47

Well, there has to *be* a special occasion, and those seem to be at a premium LOL. I understand it's ok to have nights off with it. But since I'm single now, I'm not that worried about getting it at this point in my life. It's those if/when questions about how bed partners co-deal with the things that has me wondering. And, of course, more here-and-now kinda questions, like comfort, getting used to it, etc. Apparently there are so many kinds and so many masks, that there are a variety of comfort options. Yeah, I know the benefits will outweigh those things. But still, for a 33yo, it's kind of a 'wow' moment- my first medical accessory!

posted by moonbird 09 January | 20:55

holy frijoles, 52 times?! Just think how fabulous your complexion and attention span will be as a result of CRAPping. And anyone who doesn't understand doesn't deserve anyone as fabulous as you, moonbirdie.

posted by chewatadistance 09 January | 20:55

The Marine thing has untapped romantic possibilities, dude. Think of it, you're the tough grizzled cheroot chompin' sergeant, he's the scared kid from Iowa away from Mary Lou, scared and alone as he battles for his country, he turns to you for wisdom and...comfort.

Tell it to the Marines, indeed.

posted by jonmc 09 January | 20:57

Aww, you're all too kind. Really, you are all such great people.

I know this will benefit me a great deal- I sleep so pitifully that I spend a lot of my day in a zone, and am most productive when the day is nearly over. It's all because of my tonsils and an oddly narrow airway, according to my doc. My airway is 2/3 slimmer than the average. They considered surgury, but since I do voiceover work, it would change my range and sound. Besides, I'd rather do this than be all cut up, etc.

Thanks for the support all- I've haven't talked to anyone other than docs about this today, it's just kinda bursting out.

On preview: Jon, that really blows my mind. I've got to try it out. ;>

posted by moonbird 09 January | 21:01

Just don't get discouraged if it's really hard to get used to it. I'm sure you've heard that a lot. I've had mine for almost 3 months and it's wonderful to get a good night of sleep. It took me about 2 weeks before I was able to sleep all the way through the night with it on.

posted by agropyron 09 January | 21:07

Man, maybe I have a career in gay porn. Sadly that won't get me laid. Well, at least not the way I'd prefer...

posted by jonmc 09 January | 21:07

The Marine thing has untapped romantic possibilities, dude.

posted by LarryC 09 January | 21:24

That's precious!

posted by moonbird 09 January | 21:26

Good luck with the machine, Moonbird. Andrew Sullivan blogged about using one last year. He reported dramatic improvements in his levels of energy, alertness, productivity and flatulence. I'd take that deal.

posted by LarryC 09 January | 21:33

Iwo Jizm ("we must all raise the flagpole together, fellas!")
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (A black platoon comes across a deep underground bunker full of Vietnamese soldiers, everybody wins for once...)

okay, i can't think about this anymore...

posted by Hellbient 09 January | 21:35

In the immortal Ladies Man by Richard Price the protagonists long lost high school buddy (who has turned out to be gay) is taking him on a tour of the Village's gay bars. When they're outside a rough trade joint, the protagonist balks.

"It's lightweight, dude" his gay buddy says.
"Oh yeah? tell it to the Marines!"
"I'm sure the Marines already know"

(a very funny moment in a book full of them)

posted by jonmc 09 January | 21:45

Hey, my husband has one of those.

Doesn't affect our love life in the least. Quality of life in every area is way way way better. He used to snore loud enough to be heard outside, plus the snorts and gasps and stopping of breathing were horrible to have to listen to.

The noise of the machine itself is kinda like a white noise machine-in other words, not a bug, a feature.

You'll be posting here soon full of vigor, vim and vitality. You'll wish you'd gotten a cpap machine much sooner!

posted by bunnyfire 09 January | 21:49

heck, even Barbie has one.

posted by Hellbient 09 January | 22:04

Sleep Apnea Barbie is awesome. They ought to sell that to little girls so they can learn something about reality.

posted by ikkyu2 09 January | 22:11

I *WISH* my better half had one of these, moonbird... he won't get tested for it, but I swear he has sleep apnea. If I'm awake at night, I occasionally hear long pauses in his breathing from time to time, followed by a loud snort/gasp. But he won't even consider it.

posted by BoringPostcards 09 January | 22:14

OMG Sleep Apnea Barbie! That's the laugh I needed. Really, spectacular! Ikkyu2, this has been a long time coming, glad I'm finally getting something done. BoringPostcards, seriously have your partner consider it. I finally decidied to be tested after persistant rumination upon a friend who died from it. It's a serious condition, but hey, I'm diggin' the levity!

posted by moonbird 09 January | 22:51

BoringPostcards, does he know he could have a heart attack or stroke if he has it and it is untreated?

It took my husband's boss weighing in to get my hubby to go get checked-what he learned scared the crap outta him. It really is that serious.

Email is in the profile-tell him to email me, if he will. I can tell him-or better yet hubby can-the benefits of getting this taken care of.

posted by bunnyfire 09 January | 23:35

My dad wears the supercharger, and my brother is borderline. Pops reported feeling 10 years younger and 10 IQ points smarter after breathing properly all night long. I kinda want to get tested & try one out.

posted by Triode 10 January | 00:56

Mom has a machine. She's got the apnea and narcolepsy. It took a bit, but she got used to it.

posted by safetyfork 10 January | 09:06

My wife is on a CPAP. It has no effect on our lovemaking, as she does not don it until it is time to go to sleep. If the lovemaking is too effective, and she falls asleep immediately, she will wake up some hours later and put on the mask. At that point, she reports, there are rather intense dreams, as she must have been sleeping too poorly to have them earlier in the night.

If the mask goes askew during the night it can be like sleeping with Darth Vader. Or, you could get a cold wind right down your back. Worst is when the thing fills with condensation, and starts spitting.

She is healthier and more vigorous since she started using the machine a year ago.

posted by sarah connor 10 January | 11:52

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