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02 January 2006

Infanticide Bistro. I had a jokey idea for a restaurant that'd only serve "baby" foods. No I don't mean gerbers & Beech-Nut. I mean shit like lamb, veal, baby green sald, bean sprouts and baby carrots. We need more for the menu. Pony up.

(scary thing is, a real restaurant like this would probably be trendy for at least a little while)
Fertilized eggs.
posted by jrossi4r 02 January | 00:42
Baby Back Ribs, baby shrimp, early peas...
posted by taz 02 January | 00:48
posted by arse_hat 02 January | 00:54
Nuts...and I was told in eighth grade science that fruit was the ripened ovaries of plants.
posted by brujita 02 January | 00:56
New potatoes, pearl onions, squash blossoms...
posted by taz 02 January | 01:00
Eggs don't count since they're not technically born yet. I know I'm being capricious, but I've gotta draw the line somewhere. maybe they can be served at the Abortion Brunch, along with caviar. Baby back ribs and baby corn are a good suggestion though.
posted by jonmc 02 January | 01:00
New red potatoes, baby bok choy...
posted by matildaben 02 January | 01:07
Baby pearl tapioca, fried green tomatoes, roasted pullet...
posted by taz 02 January | 01:11
what about beverages?
posted by jonmc 02 January | 01:14
Alright then. In place of balut, may I suggest tater tots?
posted by jrossi4r 02 January | 01:17
suckling pig!

Beverages? Well, Beaujolais Nouveau, for one, definitely.
posted by taz 02 January | 01:21
Fetal pigs? New potatoes? Roast kid? Those tiny ears of corn?
posted by warbaby 02 January | 01:24
Veal = bad. Not necessary. Not nice to the baby cows. VERY not nice.
posted by shane 02 January | 01:32
(Sorry. I know it's a joke and all. Knee-jerk veal reaction.)
posted by shane 02 January | 01:33
Camembert and brie are considered "young" cheeses, I think, so let's have some of those.

And I think green tea would qualify for a beverage.
posted by taz 02 January | 01:44
Kid-ney beans.

Maybe stuff from a young food engineer.
posted by shane 02 January | 01:50
Eight-year-old Scotch. Unlike 12 -year-old, it's still pre-pubescent.

posted by shane 02 January | 01:57
Artichokes (basically, they are unopened flower buds; capers are also buds), summer squash, green Key lime pie, bamboo shoots, pickled ginger shoots, scallions.

Another beverage: Kefir - Fermented juice of young coconut.

(Night, shane!)
posted by taz 02 January | 02:08
Babies respond best to the taste of other babies. Duh.
posted by interrobang 02 January | 02:35
Baby chickens on a spit.
Roasted baby beets.
Wilted baby spinach (which evokes a nice image, at least to me).
Sauteed baby artichokes.
Deep fried baby crabs.
Fiddleheads (immature fern tops).

Hard part is coming up with desert.

Oh yeah, for cocktails.

This one, a Tie Me to the Bedpost, Baby sounds interesting. So does a Baby Guinness for that matter.
posted by fenriq 02 January | 02:45
I'd eat there (or at a place with a similar philosophy, Jon).

Hell, I'd make an effort to eat somewhere like that.

(If I had $xxx million bucks; I'd raise a gallary/restaurant - hire aspiring chefs on a rotational basis to create meals, rent out the upper parts of the building as studios/apartments and lease it out cheap to aspiring artists - who live in the apartments and use the studio areas to create stuff to show in the restaurant area.)
posted by porpoise 02 January | 02:53
porpoise your dream sounds like the Cameron House in the early 80's.
posted by arse_hat 02 January | 03:05
Hey eggs, are out, but what about unborn duck fetuses? You could even pickle 'em.
posted by Edible Energy 02 January | 03:56
The New vegetables (baby carrots, peas, etc) should be called Soylent Greens.
posted by seanyboy 02 January | 04:06
Man, this thread has just sent me such an awesome, yet unrelated, idea.

I need to talk to some pros this week, and flush out what's wrong with this my idea, and why it hasn't been done yet!
posted by mosch 02 January | 05:03
mosch, if it goes commercial than we'll be expecting our 10% inspiration fee.
posted by fenriq 02 January | 12:56
fenriq: if it goes commercial, i'll let you guys cover 10% of the first year's losses ;)
posted by mosch 02 January | 13:44
Neat stuff, arsh_hat - thanks!

Everything has been thought before, but the problem is to think of it again. - Goethe
posted by porpoise 02 January | 14:16
Edible energy--those ducks are the same ones I suggested, but mr. mc shot me down. Which is a shame, because then he could call the restaurant Feed Us.
posted by jrossi4r 02 January | 14:22
Oh, I didn't even notice you'd mentioned Balut before. Man, pickled Balut. That's about as gross as it gets.
posted by Edible Energy 02 January | 14:54
Somehow, baby plants do not induce hurling as much as baby creatures.

LOL @ jrossijr!
posted by chewatadistance 02 January | 15:24
Voted off the Linguistic Island || It's out with the garden gnomes