I've seen these before, but I think my new favorite one is:

Small minority wanted to spoil it for the rest of us. There's always one - is it you?

Those are beautiful. The Chicago Reader always had the best "person to person" ads, and I had experience with e.g. the New York alt-weeklies too. Witty, abstruse, non-sequiturs, and long-running conversations that you were never sure were between people who had just met as "paper names" in that column of blips. It was very internet-like, I long ago noted in retrospect.