MetaChat - You people crack my shit up.

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23 December 2005

You people crack my shit up. Will you be my friends?

post by: mike9322 at: 08:14 | 41 comments

Yes, I will be your friend. But first you have to go through the initiation ceremony. I'm not sure what it is, but it probably involves cilantro.

What does it feel like when your shit gets cracked up? Does it hurt when it comes out?

posted by iconomy 23 December | 08:20

On the contrary! It greatly eases elimination.

I love cilantro!

posted by mike9322 23 December | 08:31

What's up, mike9322?

posted by sciurus 23 December | 08:36

Well, sciurus, I'm at work. Whee. But no one's actually *exaggerated quote marks in the air* working, and I scored two tickets to the matinee Lion King musical tomorrow. So it's not all bad.

posted by mike9322 23 December | 08:43

I'm at work too, the only people here apart from me are the people who are here before I come in and leave [if they leave at all] after I go home. I'm bailing early today and making the four hour drive to Connersville for some of my mom's vegetable stew.

posted by sciurus 23 December | 09:13

I'm working from home today. I will be your friend only if you wear a brown button-front cardigan.

posted by chewatadistance 23 December | 09:17

Normally Friday is donut day at work.
But today, apparently, is cupcake with 2" neon green icing day.

posted by danostuporstar 23 December | 09:18

But today, apparently, is cupcake with 2" neon green icing day.

Well, that should do something interesting to your shit.

posted by Frisbee Girl 23 December | 09:20

My boss just announced we could all go home!
She was just fucking with us.

Then she started bitching about the cupcakes.

posted by danostuporstar 23 December | 09:24

sciurus: Yum. I'd like some mom's vegetable stew too please. My email's in my profile.

yoga: Then I suppose we shall be sworn enemies. I only have black zip-up cardigans.

danostuporstar: Is it the delectable sugar icing or the vile whipped icing?

posted by mike9322 23 December | 09:31

Sugar vs. whipped? The cheaper one.
Delectable vs. vile? Very possibly both.

posted by danostuporstar 23 December | 09:43

I'm at work too. Not doing anything particularly productive. The bus was empty today!

posted by sisterhavana 23 December | 10:17

I at work, too. Half day. Then I gotta do all my Xmas shopping in one big crack-like burst.

Lucky, lucky, lucky me, I'm a lucky son of a gun...

posted by jonmc 23 December | 10:20

Give everyone you know coupons for "One Hour of jonmc Love". (Ninety minutes for the really special ones.) People love that. And if they don't, call them "materialistic" and then they'll feel bad. What could go wrong?

posted by mike9322 23 December | 10:41

They're all getting gift cards this year. That's all they usually get us. We don't even need to bother visiting, really, we could just slide our gifts under the door like chinese menus.

posted by jonmc 23 December | 10:43

I made all of my presents this year. Homemade stuff is the shit.

posted by iconomy 23 December | 10:45

I wish I could make shit for people.

posted by danostuporstar 23 December | 10:54

Today you can make neon green shit for people. Heidy-ho!

posted by mike9322 23 December | 10:55

Will you be my friends?

What's in it for us?

posted by mudpuppie 23 December | 11:55

Coupons for "One Hour of mike9322 Love". Or gobs of cash.

This offer subject to change.

posted by mike9322 23 December | 12:08

Do the gobs on the cash have anything to do with the coupons?

If so, thanks but no thanks.

posted by danostuporstar 23 December | 12:11

I will be your friend only if you wear a brown button-back cardigan.

Really, I'll be your friend just because. And you like cilantro!

posted by Specklet 23 December | 12:37

So, by my count, I have 2 new confirmed friends and 1 new mortal enemy, to go with several noncommitals. That's a net win!

posted by mike9322 23 December | 12:54

Loving cilantro is NOT something to be proud of.

*shudder*

posted by bunnyfire 23 December | 12:58

I didn't say I was proud of it. I just like it. Mmmm, garlic cilantro chicken enchiladas...

posted by Specklet 23 December | 13:16

I'm proud of it. *waves cilantro flag*

I'll be your friend, mike9322. Now hand over the gobs of cash and make with the lovin'.

posted by LeeJay 23 December | 13:36

*stuffs cash into pocket*

Hey Mike, ol' buddy, ol' pal!

posted by deborah 23 December | 13:37

Now hand over the gobs of cash and make with the lovin'.

OR! I said "or".

posted by mike9322 23 December | 13:39

I like mike9622 better.

posted by danostuporstar 23 December | 13:39

OR! I said "or".

No deal! I demand financial AND physical gratification!

posted by LeeJay 23 December | 13:41

Fine! Who needs ya anyway! Not me!

Psst! Hey LeeJay. Don't tell the others. *Hands over cash gobs with lovin' coupons hidden cleverly within.*

posted by mike9322 23 December | 13:49

I'll be your friend, on condition you email me a cup of coffee to keep me awake at work!

posted by ramix 23 December | 14:00

Awesome. Hello new best friend.

posted by LeeJay 23 December | 14:08

Although I love being the distinguished mortal enemy, I would be willing to accept the black cardigan, but you must remove the buttons.

posted by chewatadistance 23 December | 14:11

ramix: Done.

LeeJay: I guess this has to be a clandestine friendship.

yoga: No buttons. It's zip-up. I also enjoyed having you as an arch-nemesis but I've got LeeJay now. WINK, WINK, LEEJAY.

posted by mike9322 23 December | 14:18

NUDGE NUDGE

posted by LeeJay 23 December | 14:21

*watches with great interest*

posted by Frisbee Girl 23 December | 14:41

Okay, new friends, the glorious quittin' hour has arrived. Merry Extended Weekend to all who are receiving one. Feel free to carry on in my absence.

posted by mike9322 23 December | 15:05

Listen, there are already 9321 other mikes on the site, so you'd better stand out. mike7295 is particularly good, and mike4514 will stop at nothing, so watch your back.

posted by stilicho 23 December | 18:58

Ah, but can any of those losers do this?

What do you mean you can't see me? I'm totally doing it.

I believe this is where I say "suck it, haters".

posted by mike9322 23 December | 20:08

Somebody needs to tell this dude how evil cilantro is before he gets too comfortable around here.

posted by bunnyfire 23 December | 22:07

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