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15 December 2005

THE LOVE
That's right people. Time to bring it back to One. One Love. We're getting all het up here in a few threads -- to near MeFi-proportions.

Let's all just get together and bunny-hug, rub noses and cottony tails, and take it down a few notches.
posted by papercake 15 December | 13:43
I thought my poop thread was guaranteed to do it. Wow...it's a tough crowd today.
posted by Lola_G 15 December | 13:46
My tail is not cottony, but it is soft.

observe.

I wuv you wabbit wodent cousins o mine.
posted by sciurus 15 December | 13:50
overheard in the hallway between classes: "That sciurus is a nice bit of tail."
posted by papercake 15 December | 13:51
I have a happy thought for everyone:

Maple Candy.
posted by selfnoise 15 December | 13:52
*Leaves bucket of smooches by door, sneaks along wall, gladhands self into middle of crowd, looks over at door and exclaims*

"WhY I do delclare! While we've all been here a-flappin' our gums and a-chewin' up the fat, the smooch fairy musta snuck in and left us a little present!"
posted by PinkStainlessTail 15 December | 13:53
You can hug. I'm gonna sit in a corner, drink whiskey and mumble curses at humanity.
posted by jonmc 15 December | 13:54
Just don't puke in the smooch bucket.
posted by PinkStainlessTail 15 December | 13:55
Forgive me, jonmc, for I'm not normally a pushy hugger, but I think you do need a hug, and dammit I'm just the guy to give you a big bear hug.

*BEAR HUGS JONMC*

*Then hands him a bottle of Knob Creek*
posted by papercake 15 December | 13:57
That Knob Creek stuff can hammer a man.
posted by selfnoise 15 December | 14:00
Are we drinking' and huggin' again? Woo hoo!

/Mammers a ham.
posted by tr33hggr 15 December | 14:02
I think you need another hug, to recover from the first one.

*hugs jonmc*

*Then hands him some Camel Wides*
posted by SassHat 15 December | 14:02
Ham mammaries! *vomits*
posted by selfnoise 15 December | 14:03
Heyyy guys! Look who loves you so!

::pulls a dozen pizzas of various varities from behind coat::

Pizza for everyone!
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 15 December | 14:03
Nothing makes my day like pizza, hugs and hard liquor.
posted by SassHat 15 December | 14:04
Do you have a pizza with nuts on it?

/the set-up
posted by sciurus 15 December | 14:05
/playing along

No, why?
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 15 December | 14:05
*eyes his slice of pizza, warily*
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:08
I'm not sure I want pizza anymore...
posted by SassHat 15 December | 14:09
get your hands of my ass, both of you!
posted by jonmc 15 December | 14:16
Thanks for driving "I'm gonna dip my balls in it" a la Baldwin shortly before I have to go into a meeting with our vice president.
posted by tr33hggr 15 December | 14:18
Metachat: Please don't puke in the smooch bucket.

(I think the problems we're having are a result of all the pent up sexual tension. Or maybe that's just me.)
posted by mudpuppie 15 December | 14:19
I think the problems we're having are a result of all the pent up sexual tension.

yes, if you ladies would all just admit how attractive you find me, this would be a much better place.
posted by jonmc 15 December | 14:26
Mmmm, pizza...no wait, sex....pizza and sex?

I'm sorry, you were saying?
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 14:30
yes, if you ladies would all just admit how attractive you find me, this would be a much better place.

I see that jonmc has already been at the Knob Creek.
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:31
So are you a high hugger or a low hugger, people? Do you reach up around the neck area, or down around the waist area? I'm a high hugger. (And I'm not talking about watching movies with my aunt.)
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 14:32
Ew. And I won't hug. Also, I get plenty of hot bed action. And I still hate you all. So there. Plus, I can't eat pizza.
posted by dame 15 December | 14:32
Oh, I'm a mid-hugger -- right around the chest and lift 'em off the ground!

(Except with the ladies... uh, the lady... I mean, the Wife... then I'm a variable hugger, if you get me. *waggles eyebrows*)
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:34
I think low-hugging should be reserved for people you have or have had an intimate relationship with. For all others -- family and friends -- high hugging is the way to go.

I'm certain I feel fairly strongly about this.
posted by mudpuppie 15 December | 14:34
Scirius put his balls on the pizza, Frisbee Girl!
posted by SassHat 15 December | 14:34
*HUGS DAME, WHETHER SHE WANTS IT OR NOT, DAMMIT*

*Then hands her a bottle of Knob Creek*

(Everyone gets a bottle!)
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:35
I sneak up on people from behind and pounce-hug.

I don't hug strangers. The awkward semi-hug is yucky.
posted by selfnoise 15 December | 14:35
I am a half hugger. One arm high, one arm low.
posted by SassHat 15 December | 14:37
I don't drink brown liquors either. I hate this party.
posted by dame 15 December | 14:38
The awkward semi-hug is yucky.

You know what I hate? That awkward guy half-hug-half-handshake. Someone sticks out their hand. The other person looks at it, unsure whether to take the hand or hug. Your choices here are:

1. shake the hand and call it a day
2. shake the hand, then lean in for the one-handed hug (usually including a pat on the back)
3. coming in for the hug anyway (which can either be a great "yeah, we're good friends we should hug" kind of thing or a "oh, this guy is completely stiff and I finally get it -- he hates me" OR "oh, this guy is completely stiff and wants me", which can be awkward for other reasons)
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:39
*takes the Knob Creek from dame and replaces it with a bottle of Grey Goose*

(I should have remembered.)
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:39
I like to fuck and fight and as a free roaming bandito with no gods or kings, that's just what the hell I'm gonna do. That having been said, I bear hug and arm clasp full contact man* hug. (ladies do this hug if you get the chance, with someone you don't mind is gonna be crushing your boobs a little, it looks dumb but it's very satisfying).


*Handshake into hug.


Dame
I got your next three clear drinks. If it's zimas I'ma snicker though.

posted by Divine_Wino 15 December | 14:42
awwww. today I will hug.
posted by gaspode 15 December | 14:42
I'm a mid hugger and sometimes a cross hugger (one high, one low), but I'm also more of a full body hugger, unless the other person is frail and then it's more of an A-frame hug. I do my best not to touch people who don't like to be touched, but sometimes I forget.

My favorite fellow huggers run up and lift me off the ground in huge back cracking bear hugs. Those are awesome.
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 14:44
*BEAR HUGS FRISBEE GIRL*

*a crack is heard*

*Offers her: a bottle of Knob Creek or a bottle of Grey Goose*
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:45
*hugs back* RAAAAH!!

Knob, please!
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 14:50
The best are full on body hugs, when you just really try to wrap your whole body around someone you luv. That and the reverse Indian-grip hug, which only a few know about and I am sworn to secrecy under penalty of having my balls removed and served on a pizza.
posted by tr33hggr 15 December | 14:51
I think I high hug because I'm more likely to get my boobs crushed and lifted off the ground.
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 14:52
Yaaaay whuffles for all!

Man, I'm totally with Fris on this. I'm a mid hugger because I'm all short and dainty and whatnot, so it's awkward for me to neck hug most folks. (Although, if I'm being a coquette, I'll hug a tall guy around the neck so he has to lift me off the ground, thus making full body contact necessary. Also, ears are easily nuzzleable in this position.) I do the full body thing, which sometimes takes people aback. And yeah, the bear hug being lifted up thing is the best!

Fris is a good hugger, I know. And whuffler.
posted by Specklet 15 December | 14:56
*HUGS GASPODE*

*Offers: Cake or death?*
posted by papercake 15 December | 14:57
Scirius put his balls on the pizza, Frisbee Girl!

I DID NOT. I put nuts on 'em.

I'm a high hugger because I'm tall. Although to me they seem like low hugs cuz I hafta bend over.
posted by sciurus 15 December | 14:57
Let's be honest, speck, when are you not being a coquette?
posted by mudpuppie 15 December | 14:59
Yay. Now that I'm drunk on clear liquids, I will hug. But you better not take pictures.

(Also, papercake, don't you still owe a vodka tonic? Maybe in a few years after you get bored of your wife, you'll come to a meetup.)
posted by dame 15 December | 14:59
I'm a giant. People rarely try to lift me. And when they do, I worry, because I weigh more than you'd think looking at me. I am one of those true large-boned folk.
posted by dame 15 December | 15:01
Yeah, I do owe you a vodka tonic. Y'all just keep having meetups that I can't make it to, dammit.
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:03
Unless it's during the time when the weight of air on the boobs hurts, the boob crush is a definitive highlight of the experience.

Hugs are truly on of the best things ever. Just think of how many kinds of hugs there are:

-Dog and cat hugs are sweet.
-Baby hugs are just sublime and juicy, too.
-The monkey hugs that kids do where they launch themselves at you and wrap all of their limbs akimbo around you (bruises will result) are wonderful.
-The surreptitious hug can leave me a bit weak in the knees.

I hug you all.

On preview: "So my choice is 'Or Death?'"
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 15:10
Hi, everybody. Who does a fella have to [xx] to get a drink around here?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:13
I'm an awkward hugger who is much better at hanging out in the parking lot in ripped black tights smoking cigarettes & passing around a mason jar of clear, clear Georgia mountain liquor.

However today being a snow day and all
* I had pizza for breakfast
* I'm drinking irish whiskey & coffee & cocoa right now
* I just hugged my kid.

;-)
posted by mygothlaundry 15 December | 15:15
"Well, we didn't expect there'd be such a run on cake..."

On preview:

*BEAR HUGS IT'S RAINING FLORENCE HENDERSON*

*Offers: cake, death, vodka, whiskey, white wine (Pinot Grigio), red wine (Merlot -- quite nice, actually), or Captain Morgan's rum*
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:16
I don't think we know each well enough for a bare hug, yet.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:19
papercake you're a great hugger.

I'll take a Captains, of course. Captains and ginger, please.
posted by gaspode 15 December | 15:19
*bear hugs IRFH, runs for Knob Creek*

Let's be honest, speck, when are you not being a coquette?

I'm sure I don't know what you mean.

On preview:
Looks like your drink is covered, IRFH, but I stand by the bear hug.
posted by Specklet 15 December | 15:19
What happened to my nuts?
posted by sciurus 15 December | 15:24
Can never have too many drinks, Speck! And "bear" hugs are fine, I suppose, so long as I have time to set my beverage down first. It's the "bare" hugs I was worried about. Not cause I don't like 'em, mind you. But because I do.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:25
*puts pants back on*

*smiles sheepishly at IRFH*
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:25
*smiles sheepishly back at papercake*

What's up, man?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:27
They look fine to me, sciurus.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:29
Uh, nothing IRFH... nothing.

*puts shirt on*

*pick up booze, looks for someone to hug*
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:30
Okay - now it's time to flirt with the ladies.

So what the hell is a "whuffle," anyway?
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:30
I'm an awkward hugger myself. Human contact makes me want to cry. Except when I'm at a strip joint.

Or sometimes I'm really comfortable with hugging. Hard to tell. It's a matter of situation entirely.

It might be enlightening that I can't remember the last time I shook my dad's hand, or my brother's, for that matter. But we have an awesome relationship, so put that in your Freud and smoke it.
posted by Hugh Janus 15 December | 15:33
*Shakes Hugh Janus's hand*

*Offers: Cake, Death, Wine, the Spanish Inquistion*

posted by papercake 15 December | 15:34
*crooks pinky finger at papercake*

You know, IRFH, a whuffle! Where you put your nose on someone and breathe in and out and maybe nibble them a little. This can either be sexy or goofy. Or both.
posted by Specklet 15 December | 15:34
Hugh, if doesn't upset you too much, I'll pinkie hug you. My sister and I used to do that under the table for support when things got tense at the Sunday dinner table. Worked wonders.

And sciurus, what's all this about your nuts and so forth?
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 15:39
*Arrives late, looks around to see if there are any hugs left*
posted by matildaben 15 December | 15:41
*BEAR HUGS MATILDABEN -- LIFTING HER OFF THE FLOOR IN A MOST SATISFYING WAY*

*Offers: chocolate milk, Sunny Delight, Jack Daniels, and a six pack of Corona*
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:44
No, but I've got a 12-gauge and bottle of Wild Turkey. Wanna party?
posted by jonmc 15 December | 15:44
*sneaks in when matildaben opens the door, hides in corner, hugs self and watches*
posted by danostuporstar 15 December | 15:45
*wraps matildaben in big hug*

But you've gotta talk to papercake about the booze.
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 15:45
Shit. Someone's going to have to go on a booze run.
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:46
Well, as an old married man, I'm far more comfortable hugging men. Because I really, really like women. So I generally avoid too much contact. And whuffling, I'm afraid, sounds right out. Yeah.

*downs drink, looks for another*

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:47
This is getting pretty festive. What with all the booze, we might be moving beyond hugs and into whuffles and smooches and stuff soon.
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 15:47
I'll do the booze run. Orders?
posted by gaspode 15 December | 15:49
*sidles up to the wall and dims the lights*
posted by papercake 15 December | 15:49
*quickly walks over to check out jonmc's 12-gauge and Wild Turkey*
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 15:50
A whuffle! I am going to start doing those! So cute.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 15 December | 15:56
*sidles up to papercake and takes off scarf*

gaspode, I'd love some red wine, maybe a pinot noir?

Also, where's the damn misletoe in this joint?
posted by Specklet 15 December | 15:57
*winks at papercake*

Excellent work on the lights.

*pulls dano out of corner*

It really can't be all that much fun over there, can it?
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 15:59
HOOOOO!!! Mistletoe??

And can we get some 'nog in this joint?
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 16:00
*does the finger-gun thing and winks back at Frisbee Girl*

*hands Gaspode a LONG LIST o' booze* (sorry man, you asked for it)
posted by papercake 15 December | 16:01
Where's the damn joint in this mistletoe?
posted by Hugh Janus 15 December | 16:04
*gives Frisbee girl a snog*

*points up at mistletoe*
posted by papercake 15 December | 16:06
*smiles awkwardly at Fris, sits as close to the end of sofa as possible*

I really don't do well at parties.
posted by danostuporstar 15 December | 16:07
Pink, you should! Me and my two best friends whuffle each other constantly. (One of the things that first endeared me to Frisbee Girl is that within two seconds of meeting her in the flesh, she whuffled my neck and told me I smelled good.) I learned whuffles from my mom, who used to wake me up in the morning by lightly snuffling my cheeks and nose. The trick to a good whuffle is to breathe in and out quickly, like a dog smelling something really interesting. If you like, every once in a while you can exhale forcefully to get rid of accumulated air, again, like a dog will do. This usually makes the whufflee giggle. To make sexy whuffles, you go slower, on more sensitive parts of the face and neck. Include the ears, maybe lick the earlobe, and say "mmmmm".
posted by Specklet 15 December | 16:10
*brings dano a drink, talks football with him*
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 16:10
Way to kick drunken Irish ass, rainbaby. Think we'll meet in the Championship?
posted by danostuporstar 15 December | 16:12
OK that's the whole liquor store I'm buying, making sure I get pinot noir. And maybe some peanuts.

Sweet.

*passes Hugh the joint*
posted by gaspode 15 December | 16:12
Enough of this fucking mushy-assed togetherness. I'm stressed to fucking eyeballs, and my online day hasn't helped. Dosen't anybody want to rage pointlessly?
posted by jonmc 15 December | 16:15
Oooo, Specklet, I liiiiiiike. I now have a new greeting for Mefi Meetups!

I keed, I keed! Unless you're damn sexy.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 15 December | 16:21
*HUGS JONMC AGAIN*

*whispers: I think some people are out in the back shooting at shiny things and hitting trees with baseball bats whilest screaming expletives*
posted by papercake 15 December | 16:21
I don't know dano, but here's to it *clink*.

jonmc, raging is in the backyard I think - why dontcha take that gun out there and shoot at pie pans or something?
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 16:21
(contemplates yelling JINX at papercake, but doesn't want to get shot)
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 16:22
Specklet is damned sexy.

Hugging is the best.

Whuffling is the best, too.

Hugging'n'whuffling is to die for.

On preview: thinks appropriately naughty thoughts about papercake's and rainbaby's collective wonderfulness.
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 16:25
I brought a bottle of Grey Goose in with me. I'm too ticklish to whuffle, but I'll take hugs of any squishiness or height.

And flirts. Always flirts. Especially from jonmc if he hasn't passed out in the corner yet.
posted by matildaben 15 December | 16:26
*goes home to take a cold shower*
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 15 December | 16:28
*Gazes lovingly at Fris.*

But, but, but Fris, if papercake and I had collective wonderfulness, would someone have left the cake out in the rain?!?!

Has anyone partied enough to laugh at that yet?
posted by rainbaby 15 December | 16:30
Especially from jonmc if he hasn't passed out in the corner yet.
posted


I'm in the new thread raging pointlessly. Meet me there. Bring weapons.
posted by jonmc 15 December | 16:32
*laughs heartily at rainbaby's joke and falls off sofa*

A scenario far more accurate than I'd care to admit, but we all have our talents, no?
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 16:34
*pounces on Fris whilst on floor and crawls all over her, growling and whuffling*
posted by Specklet 15 December | 16:36
*eyes the empty room* I missed all the hugging??? Waiiii!
posted by TrishaLynn 15 December | 16:37
/Hugs TrishaLynn

Man, I go into a meeting and miss all the fun? Where's my smooches??
posted by tr33hggr 15 December | 16:41
He's only doing it because he thinks you're a tree. Run before he prunes you. Run!
posted by jonmc 15 December | 16:42
LOL jon! Curses on my ill-chosen user name. I should have been bab3hggr!
posted by tr33hggr 15 December | 16:45
But I have seen her MySpace page, and I feel assured she is no tree!
posted by tr33hggr 15 December | 16:45
*HUGS AND WHUFFLES TRISHALYNN*
posted by papercake 15 December | 16:47
I have a MySpace page? That's news to me.
posted by TrishaLynn 15 December | 16:58
THIS JUST IN: I am NOT this Trisha Lynn. Thank you.
posted by TrishaLynn 15 December | 17:03
*puts Imani Coppola's "I'm A Tree" on the stereo*
posted by papercake 15 December | 17:06
Hm. I think everyone's gone out back for the fightin'.
posted by papercake 15 December | 17:09
Imani Coppola! Is she still around?
posted by ThePinkSuperhero 15 December | 17:17
Imani: I think she put out another album or two, but I haven't heard any of it.

Alrighty fellow love bunnies, I'm off to my Thursday night poker game.

Wish me luck. I got cleaned out last time.

*KISSES EVERYONE HE CAN FIND ON THE WAY OUT*
posted by papercake 15 December | 17:20
*wakes up curled against couch, with mistletoe tucked behind ear and smelling of Specklet's perfume*

Where'd everyone go?
posted by Frisbee Girl 15 December | 18:36
*falls off chandelier into Fris's lap*
posted by sciurus 15 December | 19:30
Such a squirrel thing to do.
posted by Specklet 15 December | 20:35
*group grope*

or should that be...

*gropes group* ?
posted by deborah 15 December | 23:40
Can we talk about poop for a minute? || You Say It's Your Birthday

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