Is it something that's going to spoil soon? How territorial is your roommate regarding food?

I guess my take on the ethics end of it would be to take the "you gonna eat this?" route. That gives him the chance to claim the food if he's still interested in it, or to give it to you if he's not.

I have pondered this exact question. I ended up eating it, then saying to the roommate, "I ate the [whatever] in the fridge, that wasn't yours was it?" This gives them the chance to say that it was and have you replace it, but chances are they either won't remember or won't care.

Like bmarkey said, how territorial is your roommate? If you don't know, defer to asking. I made the mistake of not asking with my last roommate. He went nuts. For the next several weeks, he was always making comments under his breath about how he was going to go make himself (some food product that belonged to me) and that perhaps later tonight, he'd take a nap on my bed and if he got too bored, he'd take my car for a spin. It was weird. It took a lot of pot to iron that out.

I don't really intend to eat his food. But it pisses me off that he frequently buys, say, a carton of milk when there's already one of his in the fridge (unexpired, and of the same size anyway). Or to find produce that's started to go bad. And the like.

Why not ask, generally, how he wants the food thing handled? He may be buying for more than himself - like specifically buying extra of some stuff (like milk) "for the house" or something.

In my shared living space experience, some people can be completely laissez-faire about their food, a very few people can be very nitpicky about certain favorite or special foods, and some other people can just fly off the handle, get paranoid, and start leaving "I spit in this milk" post-its around.

Yes, you're supposed to write "So did I" on the note.

bmarkey's got it...how wound up would he get if you did eat it?

If your roommate doesn't care (sounds like he doesn't), eat it. If he might care a little, tell him "dude, manage your produce a little better or I'm going to throw away your stanky mushy cucumbers."

Why does it piss you off? It's his money and his food, he can do or not do what he wants with it. Unless he's taking up more space than is his fair share and preventing you from using said space for your own exacting grocery inventories, what difference does it make to you? As for the rotting/expired items, toss them and tell him. It takes, what, maybe 30 seconds to do so?

Seriously, if this is the worst of your compliants about your roommate, you are in a highly coveted situation.

I think my roommate and I are an anomily. We tend to shop together and all food is prety much communal.
Easier that way, tiny kitchen, tiny fridge, why have two seperate food supplies? We basically like most of the same foods, anyways.

It would piss me off cos I just fucking hate wasting food. I have been known to eat some fucked up dinners just to use up food that's on the verge of spoiling. And now poor mr. gaspode has to live with me itemising everything and never spontaneously buying produce if it's not in the weekly eating plan.

I kind of suck sometimes.

I don't have an answer to your question, so I swiped one from The Onion.

"Mmmph, mmph, mmmmmph... MMPH! (gasp) MMPH! Mm-mmm-rrrrrr-nnnnn-mmmm-rrrumph oompth mmph rrrmmm-nnnn-OOF! (pant, pant!) OOF! Urrrrrgggghhh-gggrrgle oompth-mmph! MMMPH! MMMPTH! Brrr-oooooo-nnnn-yowww-rrrrrummmm-nummm.... Nnnnnph! NNNPH! NNNNNNNNPH! Oh God... MMMMMMMPH! (gasp!) (pant, pant, pant...) (gurgle!) MMMPH!"

Well, in addition to this, which is still my best advice... Eating and food and the buying and storing and partitioning thereof is always a really idiosyncratic thing. Sometimes I might leave two or three bites on my plate, but when I wake up after my nap, I really want to eat those two or three bites... or I get a dessert from the pastry shop - but maybe I save it 'til I definitely have a craving.

In my house, my husband will definitely eat all stuff like that, unless I explicitly tell him "DON'T TOUCH", because his thing is like "you got it? you eat it, NOW. No? Guess you don't want it, then." Followed by mr_crash_davis noises, above.

But food, however it's handled, is really pretty primal to most people, one way or another, and it's just not logical or predictable. I went out and bought expensive ingredients to make a big special dish for houseguests, that took me hours to prepare, and which they loved and praised and gobbled completely - and that made me very happy...

But then I woke up one morning to find that they had consumed almost all of my special tea that I'm totally addicted to, and that (for me) is a bit of an indulgence price-wise, and which I'm always afraid the one place I get it from will stop carrying. And so I felt this secret, low-level resentment... And it doesn't make that much sense, really; I spent more than I could afford for the other thing (the special meal), and had only happy feelings about it, but this one little silly tea thing bothered me a bit.

So, I'm strange,yes. But I'm strange in the way that all people are strange - I have little particular food associations/preferences/habits/rituals/&tc. That's why, especially with a roommate, it's probably best to just get all your food preference stuff on the table.

Back in school, things were pretty lean for a couple years. I was living on popcorn and bulk lentils. My woman worked in one of the school cafeterias, and she'd kife a small calzone or slice of pizza every now and then. I can't explain that anticipation I had each night, waiting for food service pizza sauce.

Anyway, my dorm roommate fancied himself a body builder, though reading Men's Health was as close as he ever got to the gym. He always kept big jars of bulking powder and unopened cases of Power Bars under his bed. I'd been eyeing those Power Bars.

One day around midterm my hunger was unbearable. And finally I tore into the box, but I was so enervated by hunger that I couldn't rip through the mylar wrapper. I went through my roommate's desk to find his scissors. I was totally compelled by hunger.

Power Bars are unpalatable; they look and taste like modelling clay. It didn't matter. I was so happy to have something to stop my malnourishment headaches. And I have to say that any feeling of guilt disappeared too.

If you just wait to experience this level of unbearable hunger, you will be certain that eating your roommie's food is the right thing to do. The ethical doubts about stealing won't occur to you at all. Food is the first thing, morals follow on.