Nutjob, Handjob, Punjab or Goofiness? So I had a dream last night→[More:]that I was a washed-up Daler Mendhi, Tunak Tunak Tun [RealPlayer]-ing my way through a Swedish bordello. As my various selves coalesced on the balcony of the prized whore's suite I was assaulted by an assortmant of squirrels chucking mixed nuts and fruitcake and reciting chorus lines from Aristophanes. I was rescued by The Laughing Cow, who, it turned out, was the prized whore whose apartments I had conspired to enter. I then woke up on the floor with a sheet wrapped around my foot and the scent of absinthe tumbling into my nostrils.

Please advise.