MetaChat - Kisskisskissy boys

MetaChat is an informal place for MeFites to touch base and post, discuss and chatter about topics that may not belong on MetaFilter. Questions? Check the FAQ. Please note: This is important.

10 September 2005

Kisskisskissy boys I always knew Maxim was a magazine for gay men who don't know they're gay ... yet. NSFW coz it's got guys kissing. GROSS!

post by: WolfDaddy at: 18:17 | 30 comments

Now my only goal in life, wolfdaddy, is to make you vomit.

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by mudpuppie 10 September | 18:41

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by mudpuppie 10 September | 18:43

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by mudpuppie 10 September | 18:44

Great. Encourage him. I bet he's all naked and stuff now.

Hey, wait. I'm naked. AAAAAAH!

posted by loquacious 10 September | 18:47

(of course, the AC is out and it's 105 outside.)

posted by loquacious 10 September | 18:48

Uh, you'd have to try a bit harder than that to make me vomit.

Though K/S slash pics come pretty close ;-)

posted by WolfDaddy 10 September | 20:14

K/S slash? Dare I ask?

posted by loquacious 10 September | 20:23

Kirk/Spock?

posted by interrobang 10 September | 20:28

That'll be Kuro5hin / SlashDot slash fiction.
K's the self proclaimed streetwise politico who has a secret and torrid affair with the nerdy guy who likes penguins. I believe that Apple macs are involved.
...
As is Lego.

posted by seanyboy 10 September | 20:29

Oh Great - now I've got myself imagining what *exactly* could be done with a Technics kit.

/shudders.

posted by seanyboy 10 September | 20:31

Wolfie, my brotha, my ace, my main man. We've had this conversation before.

I don't begrudge anybody their male on male kissing. i'm not even grossed out by it. I just think it looks....stupid. And I've seen it in person, too. Girls kissing girls is a whole other story. But this dosen't make me homophobic, merely heterosexul.

Tangent question: if you're hanging out and you run into a fellow gay man, who's not a lover or a potential one, just a buddy, what do you do when you greet him?

Shake hands? Pat-on-the-back man-hug? Mafia style cheek kiss? Full on kiss like your grandma? I'm not being a wiseass (well, maybe a little) I'm honestly curious.

posted by jonmc 10 September | 21:40

Also, there was a Howard Stern show awhile back, where they offered this extremely straight guy (I mean extreme, compared to this guy, I'm Carson from Queer Eye) the chance to meet Haether Locklear if he made out with a gay guy for 5 minutes on camera. He did it. Afterwards he said "That was awful." "It was no picnic for me either," the gay guy said.

A funny moment.

posted by jonmc 10 September | 21:43

jonmc, I think you might have missed my point. I've read Maxim and enjoyed it immensely as a gay man. I find lots of homoerotic innuendo in the magazine and think it quite amusing that it seems to sail over the, uh, heads of most of the d00ds that read it. I doubt they'll be able to live in denial that once they've seen this commercial. ;-)

As to what I do when I greet a buddy, most often it's a big bearhug, full of all the friendly affection I can communicate. If it's a real good buddy, a big smack on the cheek (ON THE FACE GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THAT GUTTER) is not inappropriate. And if it's someone for whom I'd lay down my life, a kiss on the mouth. And this applies to gay and straight men. I'm fulla love like that.

Oh ... and I have made out with Heather Locklear. And Dennis Rodman. So there. I miss California.

posted by WolfDaddy 10 September | 22:18

I find lots of homoerotic innuendo in the magazine and think it quite amusing that it seems to sail over the, uh, heads of most of the d00ds that read it.

Well, that much is obvious. It's also the same reason why I'm surprised they're aren't more gay heavy metal fans. It's all about rooms full of hyper-masculine guys shoving eachother around and sweating. That's the dictionary definition of homoerotic, isn't it?

Oh ... and I have made out with Heather Locklear.

Heather's not really my type. Too bleached blonde used-up hooker looking. If you made out with Alyson Hannigan or Rachel Ray, I'd have to kill you. I wouldn't like doing it but it'd have to happen for the good of the Empire.

(actually this relates to a conversation I had with my gay boss. I mentioned that I had graduated high school a virgin, and had sat there in my cap and gown pissed that all the Porky's movies had lied to me. He said, "really? I had pussy thrown at me, man." I took that as more proof that the world is a fundamentally unjust place).

posted by jonmc 10 September | 22:28

as a gay man

wolfdaddy, i hereby apologize for wrongly interpreting your "GROSS".

I started it.

Sorry.

posted by mudpuppie 10 September | 22:29

It's also the same reason why I'm surprised they're aren't more gay heavy metal fans.

I RESEMBLE THAT REMARK! During the 80s, I was all about hard rockin, even if you had to have hair to go with your metal. Guns'n'Roses KILLED synthpop and thank god for that. Though Kenna's (COOL SITE ALERT) me a little wistful for it.

posted by WolfDaddy 11 September | 01:13

Silly mudpuppie. What did you think "wolfdaddy" means?

posted by stilicho 11 September | 02:59

As a straight man, I would just like to add
≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by Capn 11 September | 03:10

Silly mudpuppie. What did you think "wolfdaddy" means?
posted by stilicho 11 September | 02:59

I don't care. I'm on Capn's side.

posted by mudpuppie 11 September | 03:33

I never did understand magazines like Maxim and their ilk, now I know why.

posted by eekacat 11 September | 03:42

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by taz 11 September | 04:16

Aww! I heart taz to the infinite power of heartingness (which is nothing new).

And just for the record, big fan of guy-on-guy kissage here. Although the two guys in the clip didn't look like they were actually having all that much fun, which is (a) probably the point, from Maxim's perspective, and (b) sad.

posted by kat allison 11 September | 08:33

Yes, katallison, but that was obviously their first kiss. Now that their girlfriends have run screaming from the sight, there will be more. All the while looking at pictures of unattainable women, of course. ;-)

posted by WolfDaddy 11 September | 08:48

I find lots of homoerotic innuendo in the magazine

isn't macho bluster a classic symptom of homosexual impulse in deep denial? I actually like how most of the ass-slapping, boys-will-be-boys ethos is just a way some nmen rationalize their craving for male company, for contact with male bodies, and, well, their ogling other guys in locker rooms

I love love love my gay friends many stories about their closeted fuckbuddys who insist that, well, they love their girlfriends and anyway unless you take it in the ass you're not really gay. it's funny in a sad, sad way.

I'm -- boringly, I know -- heterosexual and massively attracted by women's bodies, have always been, but I just hope that if in the future I get a bad case of teh gay I won't be in denial like these guys are and I'll embrace my newfound gayness. not that I look forward to it, but if it happens I just hope I can be truthful with myself about it

posted by matteo 12 September | 07:28

isn't macho bluster a classic symptom of homosexual impulse in deep denial?

I seem to remember there was a study done where a whole bunch of guys were shown several images while wired to a machine that measured, ahem, "penis circumference". There were some pictures of gay porn and unsurprisingly the guys you were most homophobic responded to these with higher numbers than guys who were less homophobic.

It's pretty amazing the levels of denial you can encounter. There was one person I knew who claimed that because he was hetrosexual he couldn't tell if one man was better looking than another. How he came to the conclusion that he wouldn't be able to tell John Merrick from Cary Grant I don't know. This guy so obviously had the horn for his best friend it was hilarious.

posted by dodgygeezer 12 September | 07:58

Yay matteo! Good observations. Here's another one.

Room full of young men, aged 24-29. They're watching an early "Man Show" where Adam and Jimmy are "huh huh'ing" over their ability to get females to eat corn dogs as lasciviously as possible.

Most of the young men were "huh huh'ing" right along with Our Hosts, until I said, "You realize you're not watching the women eating the corn dogs ... you're watching the corn dogs being eaten by the women."

The red faces could have illuminated a small town for at least a day. Talk about cheap power!

posted by WolfDaddy 12 September | 10:36

So that whole room full of young men were gay? And all the other "macho" guys are gay, but don't know it yet? And of course the effeminate ones already know they're gay...so my question is:
Who's straight?

posted by rocket88 12 September | 11:53

So that whole room full of young men were gay? Who's straight?

No, they weren't gay. I just made them realize--in an extremely funny (to me) and uncomfortable (to them)--that they mythologize their own penises.

Who's straight? I AM. STRAIGHT TO BED BABY OH YEAH!

posted by WolfDaddy 12 September | 12:12

I heard Kevin Spacey is even straighter than Wolfdaddy.

posted by gigawhat? 12 September | 12:28

...they mythologize their own penises.

As do I.

BTW...does anyone actually *read* Maxim? I thought you were supposed to just look at the girlie pics at the newstand and then not buy it.

posted by rocket88 12 September | 13:00

← Absolutely ginormous || The 50 Greatest Independent Films →

HOME || REGISTER || LOGIN