MetaChat REGISTER   ||   LOGIN   ||   IMAGES ARE OFF   ||   RECENT COMMENTS




artphoto by splunge
artphoto by TheophileEscargot
artphoto by Kronos_to_Earth
artphoto by ethylene

Home

About

Search

Archives

Mecha Wiki

Metachat Eye

Emcee

IRC Channels

IRC FAQ


 RSS


Comment Feed:

RSS

03 September 2005

Modern Rules of Advertising. Can anyone think of any more?
At any meal, all members of the family will all be squashed together on one side of the table.

Everywhere you go, there is always a white person, an asian person, a hispanic person, and a black person.
posted by iconomy 03 September | 16:54
That "not-so-fresh" feeling is the number one topic of conversation between mothers and daughters.

Even the schlubbiest man will have numerous hot women falling all over him if only he drinks the right beer.

Only women eat light/diet foods.
posted by sisterhavana 03 September | 17:36
THere's always a blonde, a brunette and a redhead.
posted by puddinghead 03 September | 18:47
Technology adepts are always skinny, funless dweebs with belted chinos, short spikey hair and tucked in polo shirts.

It's like Madison Avenue never met any of the countless tie-dye wearing, overweight, long haired, bearded and mushroom munching unix/linux admins. Then again, this one is pretty bad, too.

Superstar DJs are never pasty, geeky white boys.

Car commercials never have traffic. The roads are always wet and shiny like it just rained. Buying a new car fresh from the lot is an act of supreme rebellion, not an act of financial stupidity that puts you in debt for years and devalues your "investment" the moment you drive it home. Buying a new luxury sedan or SUV frees you up from the burdens of everyday traffic and commuting - as well as the responsibilities of safe defensive driving.

I really, really loathe the "STOP. THINK. TYLENOL!" advertisements. Seriously. They make me want to throw bricks at the TV. Tylenol isn't a very safe OTC, for starters. And the tone of commercials is so life-and-death strident, like taking something other than Tylenol could somehow be bad for you, when statistically taking Tylenol with any regularity could set you up for kidney failure, especially if you forget and have a drink, even just one or two.

In fact, I hate almost all drug advertisements, OTC or prescription. There's very few of them that actually do what they claim to do without severe complications, risks, or side effects. And most of them, especially cold remedies, merely alleviate symptoms and do nothing for the body's immune system or other defenses, and usually weaken them.

There's many more, but I don't keep a notebook like some advertising wonks I know. Usually going "OMFG that is so terrible!" is sufficient.
posted by loquacious 03 September | 20:48
Apparently, menstrual fluid is blue.
posted by briank 03 September | 21:12
So is baby urine, apparently. I wonder if using a yellow fluid violates the FCC's ever so fuzzy OPI rules. (Obscenity, Profanity and Indecency).
posted by loquacious 03 September | 22:17
All bodily fluids are blue. That's because advertising people are ALIENS FROM ANOTHER PLANET.

There is no surface in the known world that cannot be improved with the addition of large advertisements or numerous logos.

Prime Time television is a much better time to discuss the utility of perscription medications than doctors' appointments.
posted by wendell 04 September | 00:29
Carmina Burana! (or see this thread where we beat overused "ideas" to death, it's kinda funny.)

Yellow and red fluid has been tested in focus groups and been deemed by 'regular folk' (who go to this sort of thing to get free sandwiches) as "gross". I've always wanted to get some princess as a spokesperson for tampons, only then would the blue stuff make sense. ;P
posted by dabitch 05 September | 06:43
At that point, Mr. Ballmer picked up a chair || The Calamari Wrestler

HOME  ||   REGISTER  ||   LOGIN