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17 August 2005

I got an asspocket full of whiskey...
and a front pocket full of gin.
posted by Divine_Wino 17 August | 16:28
Is that a wedge of lime in there, or are you just happy to see me?
posted by Specklet 17 August | 16:29
I'm just happy to see, I just drank a whole jar of white corn and I'm about to go down to the swimmin' hole and get in a fistfight with a dude name a' scurvis.
posted by Divine_Wino 17 August | 16:32
If Scurvis had sucked on a little of that lime, maybe he would have ended up with a better nickname.
posted by taz 17 August | 16:34
Do you need some nickels so you can go buy a bag of potato chips?
posted by PinkStainlessTail 17 August | 16:35
I got a jacket pocket that's just a flap, sewn on to look like a pocket.

I mean, what the fuck is up with that shit, scurvis?
posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 16:36
Ooh, never mix whiskey and gin.
posted by me3dia 17 August | 16:37
fake pockets is bullshit yo. Yes I need nickles please, a sockful of nickels, scurvisa big motherjumper. Also Scurvis is his christian name, Scurvis Cleethorpes Nicholson.


me3dia:

No worries I do it all the time, I make a special cocktail, 2 parts Whiskey, 2 parts gin, a dead bug and an alkaseltzer. I call it a sinkshitter.
posted by Divine_Wino 17 August | 16:40
Well, if whiskey makes you frisky and gin makes you grin, what makes you pregnant?

Two highballs and a squirt.
posted by jonmc 17 August | 16:41
what makes you pregnant?
Alien abduction.
posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 16:51
In a proper Fight Club style hand-to-hand fight, who would win? Scurvis? Or Vlad the Impaler?
posted by taz 17 August | 16:53
MC Hammer.

Proper!
posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 16:54
When I was 16, two of my equally booze-naïve friends and I made an improvised coctail in a 1-liter bottle to drink while wandering the neighborhood one moonlit night.

Ingredients:
1 bottle beer (MGD, if I recall correctly)
1 can of iced coffee (warm)
Vodka to fill (I think we used Smirnoff)

We called it a Russian Beer Belly. The iced coffee was meant to cover up the vodka taste, but it didn't work. We managed to drink about half of it, I think. One of my buddies got tipsy enough to think his mom could hear us a half-mile away, and proceeded to loudly tell us to keep quiet so she wouldn't wake up. Later he peed on himself while laying in the grass in a neighbor's yard.

Fun times.
posted by me3dia 17 August | 16:54
Mc Hammer from his semi-comeback video "Pumps and a Bump" where he's wearing a pair of jordans and that banana hammock and nothing else and he sorta waves his semi-erect johnson at the camera a lot or regular MC hammer?


Russian Beer Belly is such a good name, wow.
posted by Divine_Wino 17 August | 16:58
I...there....are no words, me3dia. Except that I just retched some.

(from the person who in college used to steal ethanol from the lab when she was poor). heh.
posted by gaspode 17 August | 16:59
I kind of had the pastelly 2 Legit 2 Quit Hammer mode in mind, but whatever floats your banana hammock.
posted by Hugh Janus 17 August | 17:02
I...there....are no words, me3dia.

Hey, we were 16, what did we know?
We never made it again.
posted by me3dia 17 August | 17:05
Something that sounds scary but actually tastes quite good:

Hop Skip and Go Naked!
Equal parts (equal parts, mind you) beer, gin, and lemonade.

If Scurvis had sucked on a little of that lime, maybe he would have ended up with a better nickname.

That totally made me snarf, taz.
posted by Specklet 17 August | 19:06
There is a bottle of Pimm's that I have owned for over 8 years now which is still unopened. No one knows what to do with it, but I think I know what to get the Divine one for Boxing Day now.
posted by DeepFriedTwinkies 17 August | 21:51
Cool, that way I can make pimms cups when I take out my 64 paddleyacht the Lord Byrons Tacky Bullybag for the Sheepshead Bay Regatta.
posted by Divine_Wino 18 August | 11:39
I've got a drink for ya:

2 shots scotch
2 shots tequila

pour in tumbler over ice and serve.
I call it a 'Scotchila.' My buddy calls it a 'Mexican Bagpipes.'

As the old bluesman said in Weird Science..."DRINK IT!"
posted by Fuzzy Monster 18 August | 13:38
Fuzzy
Do you know how often I say that? "Driiinggg iddd".

Mexican bag pipes indeed.
posted by Divine_Wino 18 August | 13:41
Glaysgey Sombrero!
posted by Hugh Janus 18 August | 14:50
I'm just a blank sheet of paper... || Tonino Delli Colli: Lifetime Through the Lens

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