Do you think they'll notice the swap?

And are they paying you to catsit? If the answers are no (like, they aren't saving it for a special occasion) and no, I think you should do the swap, and mention it in passing when they come back- oh, I drank that other bottle of wine, but replaced it.

We catsit for them, they catsit for us. We keep keys to the other house. A very friendly arrangement.

The guy is a real beerophile so I was thinking about offering to trade him some good beer for the wine, also.

I was thinking about offering to trade him some good beer for the wine

Probably your best route overall. "Hey, while feeding the cat I noticed..."

I thought you were going to ask if you could take it back at the end of the party, or ask the guy to give it back. Both are lame.

But sneaking it away while catsitting two months later falls under the "eccentric and kinda awesome" exception to the rule.

In fact, you should replace it with something obnoxious like grape soda.

"I was thinking about offering to trade him some good beer for the wine" This sounds great. So does this "In fact, you should replace it with something obnoxious like grape soda." but I think the first is more prudent.

Would you take back any other gift that you gave someone? Use this as a rule.

I swear that I am turning into Larry David. . .

Yeah, offer the beer swap. IT was a gift, but because you are so friendly, the beer swap gives you a way to engineer a swap without being underhanded.

I serve relative swill at big parties, too. And the etiquette of bringing a bottle is that you should never expect your hosts to open the bottle at the party itself. It's a gift for them to have later. You never know - maybe they are looking forward to drinking it, saving it for an anniversary or something. Two months isn't a long time for a great bottle to sit around.

Another thing you could do is just make sure they know it's very special. Ask them if they've tried it yet, how they liked it, and tell them the story of the wine and how it's become rare. then at least you know they'll appreciate it when they drink it, or give it to someone who will. Maybe you.

What Miko said is spot on but, "Two months isn't a long time for a great bottle to sit around.", it is if it's on top of the fridge.

On top of the fridge upright!. . .And they served the Chuck, unironically, at that party.

But I think I am going with the beer swap offer. My honor (what is left of it) is more important than a one-of-a-kind bottle. Just not by much.

Beer swap offer sounds about right, if offered in the right spirit. ColdChef is spot-on about not asking for a gift back but, if you have the sense that the beer would be a better gift for them anyway, that sounds like a win-win. It's all in the way you approach them about it.

True, bad place to store wine.

Oh, I don't serve the swill to be ironic - I serve it because I'm cheap and many of my friends are lushes. The good stuff is for smaller gatherings! It's purely an economic decision.

I serve relative swill at big parties, too.

Do you do baby showers?

String included!

Hell for hot day summer BBQ's with close (lush) friends I've done Boone's Farm! But no more. Since they moved to malt based, rather than wine based, they don't sell it in Ontario any more.

Nthing miko and ColdChef. Once a gift is given, what the recipient does with it is their business. I would get something I knew they like (or thought they would) if the occasion called for it in the future.

Aaargh, I feel your pain, it's horrible to see something wasted on someone who can't appreciate it.

BUT: you made a mistake and gave an over-extravagant gift: I think now you have to just live with it. It's not very classy to try to take it back when you realise you were far too generous.

I swear that I am turning into Larry David. . .

Ha ha ha yes. You really have to be willing to go down guns blazing over it though.

You could steal it back, then buy a replacement bottle that the salesman warns you may be a little bad, but you buy it anyway because it's cheaper, literally One Buck Chuck (you're amused just saying One Buck Chuck the rest of the day, you try to share this amusement with a panhandler as you give him just one dollar), but then when your friend comes back from his trip he notices the swap right away, and you say you drank it and replaced it what's the big deal, but he gets mad that someone would do such a thing with a gift, and you can't believe he cares since he drinks swill anyway, and he gets madder and says he liked the picture on the label, and you suggest you take a big fat picture of the label and frame it for him, maybe you could get it done in velvet so it looks good next to the blinking neon Schlitz sign in his basement, then you're asked to leave, and a few days later at that dinner party (at your house) that you forgot about, he shows up and notices you've left The Bottle sitting out, so he accuses you of stealing it back not drinking it, and you deny it, but you lose the staredown, and your wife and all the other guests start to take his side, and you tell him to just get over it, and you think you make a pretty good case and escape harm (when you give The Bottle back to him with utmost sarcasm and swear you'd rather die than have a drop of it touch your tongue), but then he reveals that he's brought the bottle of One Buck Chuck to the party, and everyone sort of sees at the same time that you're going to drink that damn thing while they all share the Oregon tempranillo. So don't do that.

This is indeed a Larry David-esque dilemma!

String included!

You're hired! Bring the swill, the string, and a baby pinata.

fleacircus: That was prettay, prettay, prettay good.

You can't take it back, really. That's tacky. You might want to mention that their storing it OH-SO-Wrong!

However, this guy sounds like me, a beerophile, who perhaps doesn't even like wine. If someone had given me a bottle of red, you better believe this bottle will be hanging around forever or until two or more red wine folks have dinner at my house whichever comes first. You might get away with a swap if you find him an extravagant beer instead.

Shopping for beerlovers when you don't know what they love is tough though, especially in the US. I'd go for something organic, a beer cup winner or a beer that's released by year. And you still need to know if they like IPO's over dutch style, if they can't stand stout or if ale is their thing so that can get you into heaps of trouble.

Once at a pub in Boston, I had a (hoogarden style) wheat beer from Nantucket Island which had used blueberries in the process which was utterly awesome - if you know of a rare combo like that perhaps?

You know what, invite yourself over to hang for a nice BBQ-dinner once the cat-sitting is over. Bring him an extravagant beer. When he offers this, ask for wine. ;)

Wow, fleacircus, you've watched a lot of Curb, haven't you?