MetaChat - I just signed a card for a co-worker who is getting married

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14 July 2010

I just signed a card for a co-worker who is getting married →[More:]
But no one seems to know his future wife's name. He's one of the computer specialists for our division, so he's dealing with all of our issues and head-aches, yet it seems we really don't know much about him. The card was making its rounds, and people were congratulating him and his soon-to-be wife, the happy couple, or a more vague "best wishes" (I felt OK with that one).

He chats about sports with some other guys, but I don't follow sports, so I've never chimed in, and I've never heard anything of his personal life. In short: I feel like a jerk for not talking to the guy more.

post by: filthy light thief at: 18:40 | 5 comments

I understand your concern, but another possibility is that maybe he doesn't care to divulge much of his personal life at work. (This possibility occurs to me because I like to keep work and personal life reasonably separate, myself.) If nobody knows his future wife's name, it seems pretty likely that that's the case for him.

I don't think you need to feel like a jerk. Maybe make a point when he's back after the wedding to offer congratulations again and ask him how the day went. Give him an opening to talk about it if he wants, and even if he doesn't offer much in the way of detail, you've at least indicated that you've taken notice of a major event in his life and laid the groundwork for future conversations.

posted by EvaDestruction 14 July | 19:30

Oh...let's name her Jude!

posted by mullacc 14 July | 21:33

No, she's obviously a Laura or Lori. Or Lauren. Or Lore Sjoberg (he hasn't been opening up much lately).

posted by oneswellfoop 14 July | 23:10

"Congratulations to you and Buuuhhppaahhhhnnn. . . . . Muhhhahhhhh. . . . . ahhhnnnaaa. . nollltuuukkkaaaaralllll. . . tashabararassssssuuuuusaaaaaaa. . . nnnnnnnaaaaaannnnnnnnncccccceeeeeee Mwaaaaaa. . . . .Mahhhhhkkkkk. . . sssseeeeeen. Maxine?"

Thanks for the thoughts EvaDestruction. Good ideas! I thought it was odd that someone found out that he was getting married on a certain date, but didn't pass along the info about who he was marrying. Incomplete picture and all that.

posted by filthy light thief 15 July | 10:51

Yesterday one of my college friends changed her Facebook status from "single" to "engaged." I was all, shit, I forgot she was dating someone! What's wrong with my memory? And then I saw 50+ comments saying "What? Who's the guy?" She's been dating someone for TWO YEARS and her friends didn't know. That's just... weird.

posted by desjardins 15 July | 11:13

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