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19 February 2009

Tales From a Flower Shop: Episode II-Men Can Be Stupid.→[More:]

I got a call this morning at work. The lady on the other end of the phone had a question for me:

She had received a dozen roses for Valentine's day. So far so good. So had the ex-wife. Which she knew about and didn't mind (uh,okay, whatever.)

But she was wondering about that THIRD charge on the bank card she shared with her husband.
Who, pray tell, got those?

At first I thought, okay, our credit card system went blooey that day for a bit, maybe a double charge? I couldn't do a computer search for a third recipient so I told her my boss would have to check and we'd call her back.

Well, the boss lady checked all right. It was a third woman. And it wasn't his mama or his sister, if you know what I mean, and I know you do.

My boss also checked re legalities, and apparently we were not permitted to tell wife who this person was as she was not the person who ordered this third set of roses.

Boss lady did tell her the...charges...were ....legitimate. Anyone with half a working braincell could do the math.

Speaking of working braincells, how stupid does one need to be to a) order flowers for another woman and b) use the joint bank card, c) leave a paper trail a mile wide, using the same florist and the same clerk for ALL THREE TRANSACTIONS WITHIN MOMENTS OF EACH OTHER?????

(I wonder if I should check the obituaries in the morning?)

post by: bunnyfire at: 21:08 | 22 comments

Back in the twentieth century, we had this wonderful thing called "cash" that allowed you to make purchases that were more or less completely untraceable. Yep, it was just between you and the merchant. Nobody else had to know. Not a faceless credit reporting agency.

posted by jason's_planet 19 February | 21:58

Not an internet marketer. It was just between you, the provider of cash, and the provider of goods and services.

posted by jason's_planet 19 February | 21:59

My SO always uses cash because it's untraceable ... :-)

posted by Susurration 19 February | 22:12

how stupid does one need to be

Sometimes people really want to be caught. Consciously or subconsciously.

posted by Miko 19 February | 22:56

omg, happy VD day indeed.

posted by eatdonuts 19 February | 23:08

My father's a jeweler. One of the bench jewelers who used to work for him once sold his next door neighbor a custom ladies' bracelet for Valentine's Day. A few weeks afterward he ran into him in the driveway and called out "Hey! How'd your wife like that new bracelet?" At which point the dude made frantic and panicked shushing gestures.

When you sell jewelry, you learn discretion, but like Miko said, some guys act like they really want to get caught.

posted by middleclasstool 20 February | 00:02

I bet it was for his mom, you little gutterminds.

posted by taz 20 February | 02:48

What confuses me is that the credit card had three transactions on it. Did he go onto the shop three times? Do Americans buy all things individually?

I'm also suprised you even considered giving the woman the information she asked for. Isn't there a shopkeepers code.

Anyway, any man worth his salt can finagle his way out of this. "my mate was with me, needed flowers and didn't have cash", "they were for the girl at work, as she's feeling sad and we did it to cheer her up", "the first set of flowers were not very good / left on the bus". The list goes on.

posted by seanyboy 20 February | 02:53

This moron was set up by some rival football fans. He seems more annoyed about having made a long drive for nothing than his wife finding out. It goes without saying that she's better off without him, in that case.

posted by essexjan 20 February | 04:11

@taz: She said it wasn't for his mama or his sister, although how can you really tell? His mom could have remarried and gotten a different last name from the husband.

posted by TrishaLynn 20 February | 06:49

I know because I saw the card message. ( We type those out and print them with the order. Again, he should have chosen the option of writing on his own little card-we have those, too and they are also free.)

posted by bunnyfire 20 February | 07:17

And let me point out that wife already had suspicions as she already had a name in mind when she called. Wasn't the same name but again, we couldn't tell her that.

I suppose we could have lied and said the third charge was a mistake but that would have cost my boss almost a hundred dollars. She is really nice but no one would expect her to be THAT nice.

posted by bunnyfire 20 February | 07:19

Seanyboy, that is also a puzzlement to me-he could have rung them up all at once for one total but chose to do three transactions. My office manager was the one who waited on him-she certainly would have known how to do this (involving printing three cards, delivering to three different addresses, etc.)

But he did do this all at one time. She remembers him!

posted by bunnyfire 20 February | 07:22

And let me point out that wife already had suspicions

Of course she did. Women without suspicious don't go calling around trying to find out what their husbands spend money on.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 20 February | 09:01

suspicious = suspicions

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 20 February | 09:02

While we're generalizing....

Women can be such gossips and busybodies. But I am sure you have everyone's best interest at heart while you are talking about people behind their back on the Internets, it still doesn't sound like a very nice thing to do.

posted by terrapin 20 February | 16:20

Oh come on, terrapin. Seriously? Isn't the internet founded on telling anecdotes behind people's backs?

posted by muddgirl 20 February | 16:48

Terrapin, I'm not using names or identifying details. I left a lot out. I'm sorry if you have a problem with these stories. I don't as I see them as either slice of life, or cautionary tales.

posted by bunnyfire 20 February | 16:56

I don't want to put words in terrapin's mouth, but my interpretation is that his beef isn't with the story per se, but rather with the 'Men Can Be Stupid' title.

posted by box 20 February | 17:22

Well, men CAN be stupid. So can women. This particular time it was a man.

posted by bunnyfire 20 February | 20:08

Well, then, that particular man can be stupid.

posted by occhiblu 20 February | 23:24

Of course men are stupid - just ask any woman. Or is it just me they say this about?

posted by dg 21 February | 06:45

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