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TWO DAYS AGO I BOUGHT A BIG BOTTLE OF SINGHA BEER BUT IT FELL OFF MY LAUNDRY AND SHATTERED SO I HAD TO CARRY IT THREE BLOCKS TO THE NEAREST TRASHCAN, BUT I JUST NOW GOT A NEW BOTTLE, SO WATCH OUT WORLD!
not really, dan. My laundry basket tipped, the plastic bag with the bottle in it was on top, I didn't cacth it in time and it shattered on the sidewalk. I carried a foam-dripping smelly plastic bag to a...heap of garbage bags if you want to know the truth, and cursed a lot.
MY STEPDAUGHTER, WHO CAME CRAWLING HOME FROM TEXAS, KEEPS TREATING ME LIKE I'M A PIECE OF FURNITURE. TODAY, HER FOUR BOXES OF CLOTHES CAME HOME FROM HOUSTON. SHE CALLED AT 5PM, ASKED FOR HER DAD. WHEN TOLD HE WASN'T HOME YET, I ASKED IF I COULD HELP. NO, SHE SAYS, I NEED TO ASK HIM SOMETHING. HE GETS HOME, CALLS HER BACK, TO HAVE HER ASK HIM ABOUT THE BOXES. THE BOXES I WAS LOOKING AT WHEN SHE TOLD ME SHE HAD TO ASK HER DAD SOMETHING. HE ASKED HER WHY SHE DIDN'T JUST ASK ME; HECK, I WAS HOME AND LOOKING AT SAID BOXES. SHE COULD NOT ANSWER. HE BLEW UP AT HER FOR THE WAY SHE TREATS ME, AND SHE TELLS HIM HE'S TREATING HER LIKE A BABY. NOTHING'S CHANGED WITH THAT UNGRATEFUL BRAT. YYYEEEEAAAARRRRRRGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I WANT TO LAUGH AT THE RED'S STEPDAUGHTER, LOUD AND MOCKINGLY IN A TONE THAT EXCLAIM "TOLD YOU SO, DUMMY, SUCK ON THAT" AND I WISH SHE COULD WANDER AROUND THE HOUSE DOING SO FOR ME SO MY CACKLING CRIES OF BITTER VICTORY HAUNT HER DREAMS AND INSTRUCT HER CONSCIENCE.
OUR MARKETING BIPPY AT WORK IS BOSSING ME AROUND BUT THE THING IS SHE IS NOT THE BOSS OF ME AND NEEDS TO COOL IT BEFORE I ASSERT MY ORG CHART ALL OVER HER CALENDAR
IF YOU'RE GOING TO INSTALL THE FUCKING SERVER, AND TELL US WE HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT THEN AT LEAST MAKE SURE THE TAPE BACKUP WORKS IN CASE THE SERVER CRASHES.
Wait, ethylene, me, or the brat? Which one is supposed to haunt you?
And IRFH, if I remember right, it works better if you freeze the body first, then chop it up, then stuff it in the woodchipper. I don't have the freezer space.
THE BABY IS MEASURING REALLY REALLY BIG,SO BIG THAT THE OBGYN HAS STARTED TALKING ABOUT C-SECTIONS! MY BELLY FEELS LIKE IT'S ABOUT TO EXPLODE, AND I STILL HAVE 9 WEEKS TO GO! I CAN'T BREATHE! I CAN'T WALK! I CAN'T SLEEP! I HAVE HEARTBURN! I HAVE BAD CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME! I HAVE EVEN WORSE SCIATICA!!! I HAVEN'T SEEN MY TOES SINCE AUGUST!!!! SERIOUSLY, IF SHE GROWS ANY BIGGER IN THERE I'LL BURST! HALP!!!!
redvixen: I'M SAYING I WANNA SMACK THE BRAT UPSIDE THE HEAD AND WALK AWAY, BECAUSE STRANGERS CAN DO THAT AND BE DISMISSED AS WANDERING CRAZY PEOPLE YOU DON'T WANT TO MESS WITH BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE TO SEE THEM EVERY DAY.
ramix-I am five feet tall and given birth to a nine pound baby naturally-and with no real problems. So a c-section is not necessarily inevitable. Also, you will probably "drop" sooner than later which will literally give you some breathing room. IIRC I was about 8 weeks away from due date when that happened for me.
But I feel for you. Even more than two decades later, some things you just remember.
One of the most recent times I visited my parents we were loking at a family album and there was a shot of my mother looking exhausted sitting down. She told me that she was sitting on one of those rubber donut cushions after giving birth to me. She still sounded angry.
I AM SICK AND I WENT TO WORK ANYWAY AND I WORK SO HARD AND ALL MY COWORKERS SAY I'M WONDERFUL AND ASK ME TO BE ON THEIR PROJECTS SO WHY WON'T THEY PAY ME JUST A LITTLE MORE MONEY SO THINGS LIKE PAYING AN EXTRA $50 A MONTH IN MEDICAL BILLS DON'T SEND ME SPIRALING OVER THE EDGE INTO DEPRESSION. I'M WORTH MORE. I KNOW, BECAUSE I SAW THE SALARY SURVEY.
YOU SO DON'T WANT TO KNOW HOW MUCH I JUST HAD TO PAY FOR REPAIRS ON MY PICKUP TRUCK. OK, SO IT HAD BEEN MORE THAN 3 YEARS SINCE I DID ANYTHING ON IT EXCEPT FOR OIL CHANGES...
IF YOU QUESTION WHETHER I ACTUALLY WORKED WHEN I SAID I DID, IT'S NOT UNREASONABLE FOR ME TO TAKE THAT AS EVIDENCE THAT YOU DON'T FULLY TRUST ME! NO NEED TO GET HISSY WHEN I ASK YOU ABOUT IT. MY GOAL IS TO GET FEEDBACK SO I CAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!
SORRY.
BEEN CRABBY.
BEEN CRANKY.
THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO DON'T NOTICE ARE THE ONES THAT SHOULD.
DON'T WORRY, RAMIX. A LOT OF PEOPLE ELECT TO HAVE C SECTIONS AND A LOT OF BABIES ARE PREEMIES NOWADAYS. THEY'RE A LOT BETTER AT IT NOW AND HAVE HAD LOTS OF PRACTICE.
I AM HAVING SOME AWESOMENESS AT WORK, BUT I'M WORKING ON DISTANCING MYSELF FROM MY PARENTS AND SINCE THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES I TALK TO IN PERSON ASIDE FROM MY ROOMMATE OVER THE PHONE (WHO I JUST SAW THIS WEEKEND AT THE AMAZING HOMECOMING THAT REALLY HAS MADE ME THINK VERY HARD ABOUT SOME ASSUMPTIONS) I CAN'T REALLY TELL THEM BECAUSE I DON'T WANT THEM TO THINK THAT I'M ATTACHED, EVEN THOUGH I AM.
MY FATHER IS OUT OF TOWN AND MY MOTHER IS DOING HER ANNOYING 'I'M GOING TO CLING TO YOU BECAUSE THERE IS NO ONE ELSE HERE' AND IT'S DRIVING ME UP THE WALL. NO, I DO NOT WANT TO WATCH STANDUP WITH YOU. I GOT UP AT 430AM TO TAKE POPS TO THE AIRPORT BECAUSE YOUR BITCHASS WON'T DRIVE ON THE FUCKING INTERSTATE. IT'S 430 IN THE MORNING! FOR ONCE, 95 ISN'T A SHITHOLE! DRIVE HIM YOURSELF!
WE WERE SUPER SLAMMED AT WORK TODAY AND I FELT ALL SHITTY BECAUSE I DIDN'T GET TO FINISH OUT MY REQUESTS BEFORE LEAVING. HOPEFULLY I'LL BE ABLE TO CONTINUE MY AWESOMENESS TOMORROW BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE A GOOD WAY TO END THE WEEK, ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT DAVE IS FINALLY BACK IN TOWN.
I REALLY SHOULD DO THE HOMEWORK FOR MY CLASS, BUT IT'S NOT REALLY THAT BIG OF A DEAL, SINCE IT'S JUST AN ASSIGNMENT TO DO IN-CLASS, BUT I'M AFRAID THAT SHE'S GOING TO WANT ME TO PARTNER UP WITH SOMEONE AND I KNOW THAT JUST WON'T END WELL BECAUSE I'VE GOT A GOOD GRASP ON WHAT IS GOING ON AND BECAUSE OF MY LUCK, I'LL WIND UP WITH SOMEONE WHO IS LIKE 'OH WHAT IS THIS MEAN' (EVEN THOUGH IT IS CLEARLY SPELLED OUT ON THE PAPER IF YOU WOULD JUST FUCKING READ IT YOU DUMBASS) AND IT WILL MAKE ME WANT TO THROW THINGS. PLUS, SHE SENT OUT THE NOTICE FOR EVERYONE TO START SIGNING UP FOR THE GROUP PRESENTATIONS, WHICH I KNOW ARE GOING TO BE COMPLETE SHIT. I SIGNED UP FOR 'ENCYCLOPEDIAS' AND NO ONE ELSE HAS EVEN BOTHERED TO SIGN UP. FUCKING GROUP PROJECTS.
I WANT A GORILLAPOD. THEY SEEM PRETTY CHEAP NOW.
I WISH THERE WAS A REAL ROOM YOU COULD GO TO SHOUT IN WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT BEING SHOUTY.
I'M NOT EVEN AS SHOUTY AS I WAS. BUT DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SHOUTING IN THE SHOUTY ROOM.
I'VE NEVER SEEN PRIVILEGED BEFORE. SO FAR KINDA AMUSING.
SO I WENT TO THE GLACIER WATER DISPENSER THIS AFTERNOON TO GET WATER FOR MY PLANTS (THEY NEED R/O WATER) AND WHILE I'M FILLING UP MY WATERJUGS, THIS GUY PUSHES UP HIS CART WITH HIS EMPTY WATERJUGS AND THEN WALKS BACK TO HIS CAR. HIS CART STARTS TO ROLL OFF THE SIDEWALK INTO THE STREET SO I GRAB IT AND STEER IT BACK BEFORE IT HITS A CAR. THE GUY TURNS AROUND AND SHOUTS "HEY! THOSE ARE MINE" (LIKE I'M GOING TO STEAL HIS JUGS AND RUN AWAY FROM THE 10 I HAD ALREADY FILLED UP) AND I'M LIKE "YES, I KNOW, THEY WERE ROLLING INTO THE STREET!" AND THE F-ING JACKASS DOESN'T BOTHER TO APOLOGIZE FOR YELLING AT ME OR THANK ME FOR SAVING HIS STUPID BOTTLES.
THANK YOU FOR THIS THREAD! THAT LITTLE INCIDENT MADE ME UNREASONABLY CRANKY FOR THE REST OF THE DAY AND YELLING ABOUT IT HAS MADE ME FEEL MUCH better.
Ethylene, I've seen GorillaPod knockoffs at Walmart for cheaps, although I haven't looked at them closely enough to determine if they are crap or not (they are hermetically sealed in plastic pods, making inspection difficult).
I'M SORE FROM THE WORKOUTS AND THE DOGGADMNED LAWN THAT MUST BE MOWED DOWN OR THE CITY WILL BUST A CAP IN MY SORRY ASS. EVERYTHING HURTS. AND IT'S RAINING. AND IT WON'T STOP. AND I DON'T FEEL LIKE USING THE FRIGGIN BACKSPACE KEYTODAY SO YO U ALL ARE JUST OING TO HAVE TO LIVE WITH ME UNPLUGGED.
AND THEY PUT THE STUPID ROOM NO ROOF ON THE POOL AND I HAT HATE HATE IT! IT'S HELD UP BY AIR AND IT HAS A HORRIBLE DOUND. IF I DDN'T HAVE A BUDDY I WOHLUND'T GO TA ALL.!
YA, I NEEDED TO HELL TOO. much better.
some things you just remember.
Yeah, I remember every bit of my birthings. They say you forget, but you don't. You just don't think about it because they're MUCH bigger pains in the ass now.
And Miko. "Marketing Bippy" "Org chart all over her calendar". Classic! I got tears here!
I HAD SOME FROOFY PERSONNEL TRAINING TOMORROW AND THURSDAY, WHICH WOULD HAVE BEEN AN AWESOME LEAD-IN TO THE THREE-DAY WEEKEND. BUT LAST MINUTE MY BOSS REALIZED THAT I WOULD BE OUT OF THE OFFICE AND TOLD ME TO CANCEL BECAUSE I WAS NEEDED THERE TO DO END-OF-PAY-PERIOD TIMESHEETS BECAUSE THE PERSON I ASKED TO DO THEM FOR ME HAS NEVER DONE THEM FOR OUR SECTION EVEN THOUGH SHE USED TO WORK IN EFFING PAYROLL AND I'VE ONLY DONE IT ONCE BEFORE. I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO WEARING JEANS AND TEES FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK AND NOW I NEED TO IRON PANTS. GODDAMMIT.
I COULD HAVE TOTALLY USED THIS THREAD YESTERDAY WHEN EVERYTHING I DID FROM ABOUT 9:30 AM TO ABOUT 3 PM WAS NEGATED WHEN MY BOSS CHANGED HER MIND ABOUT THE DIRECTION OF THE PACKAGE SHE WANTS TO SEND A CLIENT. THAT'S SIX HOURS OF WORK THAT WENT COMPLETELY OUT THE WINDOW AND NOW I'M SIX HOURS BEHINDN GETTING THIS PROJECT FINISHED TO HER SATISFACTION.
AND WHY THE HELL DOES SHE THINK A COOL GRAY COLOR CONVEYS CLASS AND SUBTLETY? IN TEXT, ON THE CREAM COLORED CARDSTOCK WE USE FOR PRESENTATION PACKAGES, IT CONVEYS ILLEGIBILITY! AND WHEN SHE DIDN'T BELIEVE ME A FEW WEEKS AGO ABOUT HOW BRIGHT RED LETTERING ON A COOL GRAY BACKGROUND IS A COLOR CLASH, I WANTED TO SCREAM BUT INSTEAD I ROLLED MY EYES SO HARD I THINK I SPRAINED SOMETHING.
However, I'm still kicking ass today and I'm soooooo glad that I'm doing what I'm doing now, so... yay!
And why does preview want to fuck up my HTML, huh?
photo by splunge
photo by TheophileEscargot
photo by Kronos_to_Earth
photo by ethylene
