Hunh. That sounds like something Bokonon might say, but as I'm packing I don't know where I've stowed Cat's Cradle. Otherwise I can imagine it would be in Breakfast of Champions, possibly said by Mr. Rosewater. I don't know where that book is, either.

I can look more later. Can you give us a starting point by telling us what Vonnegut you have/have not read? That might help.

I'm vaguely remembering it being from Deadeye Dick. The main character decides to live the later part of his life as "a neuter" and I seem to recall being really polite was part of it.

Thanks brina. That's the thing, I've read pretty much all of his fiction, and a couple of books of his essays/speeches. I seem to remember it in the context of a failing relationship. A marriage gone south. (yeah I know, another frequent theme) I'm pretty sure it was from a novel. Lentrohamsanin might be on the right track, but I haven't read Deadeye Dick for 20 years probably.

I'm pretty positive it wasn't Breakfast of Champions, but it could be God Bless you Mr Rosewater. I have that here and I'll start reading it.

Hmm. See, then it could be Galapagos, maybe something between the husband and wife who were unhappy together?

Dang, my copy of Galapagos is out to lunch apparently. To whom did I loan that? I'm thinking it's earlier than Galapagos. I'm also pretty sure it wasn't Bluebeard. I'll have to start reading with God Bless You Mr Rosewater, then find a copy of Deadeye Dick. I was hoping it rang a bell with someone. Perhaps I'll try the hive mind at MeFi. It's something that's been at the back of my mind for several years now.

Could it be, "Love may fail, but courtesy will prevail"?

That might be it occhiblu! I have Jailbird here, I'll look for it.