OH NOES! I WILL WRITE BACK WHEN YOUR EMAIL BOX HAS SETTLED DOWN!

MY NECK IS STIFF FOR NO GOOD REASON!

I HATE DEALING WITH PARKING IN SAN FRANCISCO. SUCKS!!! THIS MORNING I ENDED UP HAVING TO PAY $12 JUST TO PARK FOR MY ARABIC CLASS! IT'S JUST WRONG!

I'M TIRED OF GETTING SPAM TELLING ME THAT MY LOAN HAS APPROVED OR THAT MY GIRLFRIEND HATES MY TEENY WEENIE!

I HAVE TO DEAL WITH TAX JUNK THIS WEEKEND AND I SUCK AT IT BEYOND ALL THINGS I SUCK AT IN LIFE!

Yeah, that's about it for now.

I had to cover 9th period gym yesterday. I'm too tired to shout.

MY BROTHER HAS BEEN SCREWING UP, BIG TIME. WEDNESDAY, HE MISSED AN APPOINTMENT WITH HIS PSYCHIATRIST, BECAUSE HE SLEPT THROUGH IT. THURSDAY, HE FELL, OUT ON THE PATIO, PLAYING WITH THE DOG, AND COMPLETELY TRASHED MY GAS GRILL. HE NOR THE DOG WERE HURT, BUT THE GRILL IS TOTALLED. FRIDAY, HE PICKED UP HIS MEDS AT THE DRUGSTORE, BUT DIDN'T CHECK THEM, AND GOT THE WRONG MEDS. TODAY, WHILE I WAS OUT TO THE PHARMACY, TAKING CARE OF THAT, HE BROKE THE LAWNMOWER (AND I HADN'T ASKED HIM TO MOW).

AND IT'S POINTLESS AND CRUEL TO YELL AT THE MENTALLY ILL.

GRRRRRRRRRR.

MY ISP SEEMS TO HAVE GIVEN UP ON FILTERING SPAM. LUCKILY TERRAPIN RECOMMENDED SPAMSIEVE FOR THE MAC AND IT'S ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. IT'S FILTERING ABOUT 1,200 SPAM EMAILS A MONTH FROM MY INBOX. WHY CAN'T MY ISP FILTER SPAM AS WELL AS GMAIL? ANSWERS ON A POSTCARD, PLZ

I HAVE DECIDED THAT THERE ARE THREE LEVELS OF THE PHRASE "EXCUSE ME" (A PHRASE THAT I USE WITH HIGH FREQUENCY BEING IN RETAIL AND SCHLEPPING BOXES AND HANDTRUCKS AND DOLLYS LADEN WITH BOXES AROUND A CLUTTERED AND CROWDED STORE).

LEVEL 1: "EXCUSE ME" = "KINDLY REMOVE YOURSELF FROM MY PATH, FELLOW CITIZEN."

LEVEL 2: "EXCUSE ME" = "REALLY, GET OUTTA MY WAY, MAC!"

lEVEL 3: "EXCUSE ME" = "LOOK, FUCKHEAD, I'M REALIZE YOU'RE HAVING AN IMPORTANT DAYDREAM, BUT I'M TOTING A HUGE LOAD OF BOXES HERE, SO GET OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY OR I WILL SPLIT YOUR HEAD OPEN AND DINE ON THE FAT AND SMALL AMOUNT OF BRAINS CONTAINED THEREIN, GOT ME?"

I WAS STUPID ENOUGH TO REGISTER FOR A 10K RACE AT THE END OF SEPTEMBER AND I'M OLD AND FAT AND OUT OF SHAPE. I'VE RUN 27 MILES IN THE LAST WEEK TRAINING FOR THIS AND IT SUCKS. IT DOESN'T HELP THAT IT'S BEEN HOT AND HUMID AS HELL THIS PAST WEEK. THANK GOD TOMORROW IS A REST DAY IN MY COOL RUNNINGS SCHEDULE.

I AM SO ANXIOUS FOR NO REASON!!!

I FEEL LIKE THERE ARE ELECTRIC EELS RUNNING THROUGH MY WHOLE BODY!

I JUST THREW A TANTRUM AND IT DIDN'T DO ANY GOOD, BESIDES WHICH I DIDN'T KNOW WHY I WAS THROWING IT!!!

THE BOYFRIEND IS DRUNK AND SPILLED A TRIPLE ESPRESSO ON MY PANTS!!! I HOPE IT COMES OUT IN THE WASH!!!!

I AM DRUNK TOO!!!!

I WOKE UP THIS MORNING WITH THE MOST FRIGHTENING UNDEREYE BAGGAGE I HAVE EVER SEEN. IT LOOKED LIKE I HAD BEEN PUNCHED IN THE FACE.

STOP MOANING ABOUT SPAM.
I GET 30,000 SPAM MESSAGES A MONTH.
DO YOU SEE ME MOANING.

THE DESIGNER HASN'T FUCKING GOTTEN IT THROUGH HER HEAD THAT I DON'T WANT HER IN MY PLACE!!!! SHE WANTS TO SHOW UP WITH THE CONTRACTOR ON TUESDAY OR THURSDAY; NEITHER OF WHICH ARE GOOD FOR ME--THURSDAY IS ROSH HASHANA. MY TOOTH HURTS AND I DON'T LIKE MY DENTIST'S NEW HYGIENIST WHO REPEATS MY NAME EVERY 30 SECONDS!!! I ONLY WENT TO THE GYM ONCE LAST WEEK!!! I AM A ROTTEN SLOB AND I NEED TO FOCUS!!! THE STOCKBOYS AT THE UNION SQUARE WHOLE FOODS SLAMMED THE PEACHES ONTO THE DISPLAY SO THEY GOT ALL BRUISED. THESE WERE LOCAL ONES WHICH ARE THE LAST OF THE SEASON.


MISS LYNNSTER, WHAT DOES THE "KRS" ROOT MEAN IN ARABIC?

SO I WENT TO THE LUSH STORE AT OAK BROOK AND BOUGHT A WHOLE BUNCH OF STUFF, INCLUDING A COUPLE GIFTS FOR PEOPLE, AND THEN I WENT TO SEARS BECAUSE THEY WERE HAVING A HUGE CLEARANCE. MY ARMS WERE FULL SO I PUT MY BAG DOWN FOR LESS THAN A MINUTE TO CHECK A PRICE AND SOMEONE WALKED OFF WITH IT! THERE WAS ALMOST $40 OF LUSH STUFF IN THERE! GRANTED, AT LEAST IT WASN'T MY PURSE, BUT STILL! I HATE THIEVES! I HOPE THE PERSON WHO TOOK IT IS ALLERGIC TO EVERYTHING IN THAT BAG AND BREAKS OUT IN HUGE HIVES!