I think we just think they are. I've noticed in my area that it's all about the show the parents put on for their little darlings. My sister-in-law and brother-in-law did that for their firstborns' first birthday. The bouncy, inflatable thing, a huge tent for adults. The kid was a year old, she knew and remembers nothing.
I've given up doing those things. The most we've done is maybe a bowling party, but even then, parents around here don't rsvp, don't show up, don't call. So birthdays around here consist of the honoree picking their favorite dinner, cake for family (aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, but that's it). If they'd like to do something special with a friend (movies, etc.) we do that. But no more big parties that get ridiculously expensive, where you have no idea just how many will show up.

A bowling party! I love it. I used to go to skating parties. Those were the best.

I think you're right redvixen. The suburban moms are trying to outdo one another. We usually do family parties. Now that my oldest child is really into his friends, I want to have a kid birthday party. I've had kid birthday parties for them when they were toddlers and preschoolers. They remember nothing of course. :)

A pinata is fun. My friend does this with her kids (ages 5, 3, and 3 months). She gets the type of pinata where the kids pull ribbons, instead of possible black eyes with sticks. Other than that, she does home parties. She does have the advantage of an inground pool for her daughter's August party, though. My kids are older - 10, 14, 16, and 17, so we've escaped the kiddie parties for the most part.

It's partially competition and partially because so many suburban moms are absolutely terrified of their kids not being "popular." I can't even tell you how many parties we've been to where the party favors cost more than the present we gave. It's insanity.

We had a "jungle" party for the girl's fifth. I bought a bunch of inflatable jungle animals from Oriental Trading Company and hid them around the house and made the kids go on "safari" to find them. Then they made foam animal masks and chased each other around the house growling. Some Pin The Tail on The Donkey, a little Chicken Limbo, a lion pinata full of crap and everyone was happy.

I baked the cakes myself--a chocolate one that looked like Scar and a vanilla one that looked like Mufasa. I was pretty damn proud of that.

We always had home parties as a kid. Although my mom would go all out, everything was homemade, no clowns or magicians for entertainment. And the parents never stayed. Her cakes and invitations were the best. I remember my 'fiesta party' - the invitations were made out of construction paper and looked like tacos. The cake was in the shape of a little cart that was being 'pulled' by a ceramic donkey she just had lying around the house.

I want to have parties like that. Homemade cakes, hand made invitations. Just a time for the kids to hang out and run around together. I can't imagine spending thousands of dollars on a birthday party. I can think of lots of better things to do with that much money.

Yeah, the only event birthday party I ever went to when I was a kid (believe I was in third grade at the time) was at a roller skating rink. And the only reason the party was there was because the girl's mother worked the concession stand and they didn't have to pay for the party. Most of the kids at the party would have been at the roller rink anyhow.

I was at the roller rink about 3 times a week when I was a kid because I loved roller skating and it was pretty cheap entertainment...at that point I think admission was $2 and that was for the entire damn afternoon. [sidetrack:I wish we had a roller rink in town NOW because I would freaking love that.]

My mom has always (still does) made a big deal about birthdays but only in the way of letting us pick what we wanted to eat. We normally were allowed to invite a friend or two but never went insane with parties or anything.

My nephew normally wants to go to Chuck E Cheese for his birthday but even then - it's just so he can play the games...nobody ever pays for the party package. He's getting to an age where I expect we've only got one more birthday at Chuck E Cheese.

Great birthday party idea jrossi. Sounds like a blast. We've made those jungle animal foam masks. They are so much fun. I think I've even bought them ready-made. A tiger, a toucan, etc.

youngergirl, your mom sounds great. I had a great mom, but she wasn't the homemade type unless you count Duncan Heinz as homemade.

FBK, I love to skate. We have a rink up the street. I skate the entire session. My kids ask, "How do you know how to skate so well, Mommy?" It's so cute. They forget I was a kid once.